Without You, I'm Just Me

It was a blur when the arms were slipped away and everyone was beginning to speak at once. I saw Naomi kneeling and holding both of the boys while she cried. I was stuck, again, in shock, just watching her with them.

Then, she waved her hand up at me, "Wentz, are you all there?"

I blinked, "Yeah."

She sniffed, her arms opened and she hugged me, wrapping them around me. I exhaled and wrapped my arms around her, her hair tickled my face, her hands rubbed up and down my back. I felt choked up, "I missed you."

"I know," she whispered back. "I missed you too."

I didn't want to let her go, I just wanted to be selfish and keep my arms around her until I got tired, and even then I would want her close to me. Naomi pulled back, just a little and then kissed my cheek, "C'mon, baby, lets go home."

Naomi had smiled at me and it made me stomach flip. I kissed her and nodded, "Yeah, lets go home."

I drove us to our house; me, Naomi, Benji and Lewy in our car. Our family was following us. The ride was filled with Naomi talking to the boys about what we planned to do. Naomi wanted to go to Navy Pier when the weather cleared, then she wanted to take Benji, Lewy and Abbey somewhere for Benji's birthday, and then she wanted to build a fort and watch movies. Naomi talked excitedly, you could hear the excitement and happiness in her tone of voice. She had tears in her eyes too, but she didn't cry.

At a stop light, she put her hand on my thigh, "Me and you need to do something together too."

I nodded, "I was thinking the same."

She kissed my cheek, "I can't wait to sleep with you...and not in that way."

I chuckled, then whispered, "So you don't want to practice making babies with me?"

"Yes, but I can't wait to sleep in bed with you."

"God, I've been so lonely."

She kissed my neck sweetly, "I owe you."

I shook my head, "Nah, I owe you, I didn't know being a single parent was so rough."

She giggled, "It's over, you'll never be single again."

I could only smile and kiss her before heading off.

When we got home, there was more hugs and laughs, smiles and tears. My mom and Amy were crying and hugging her tight, and Benji broke it up, "She's my mommy! I gets ta hug her the most, gramma!"

My mom laughed, "Geez, I'm sorry, bossy pants."

Benji had smiled, "'S okay. I missed mommy most."

Naomi had picked him up and hugged him, "Oh baby, I missed you too."

The little reunion ended not long after. It was all such a big blur because things went by me so fast. One minute our family was here and then they were gone. Then Naomi had kissed the boys and announced she was going to shower, "When I get out the shower, we'll make hot chocolate and each pizza, sound good?"

"Sounds good!" Benji announced.

Lewy had stayed quiet, but you could see he was happy to have Naomi back.

She kissed their heads and headed off to our bedroom. I had turned the TV on for the boys and let them make a little nest of pillows on the floor while I went to the bedroom. I'm not sure why, but I just went to the room to be alone with Naomi. I found her there getting undressed; she had been wearing this nice blouse and blue jeans that my dad picked up for her for the court hearing. She was just in her underwear now; they was ultra thin, white and see through, leaving nothing to my imagination, "Hey."

She turned and faced me, laughing softly, "Sneaky, sneaky. What's up?"

I looked at her body, seeing everything I had missed in 155 days, "I dunno. I just...wanted to see you."

"See me naked?" She smirked.

"I haven't had none in months, can you blame me?"

She laughed again, "Well, buddy you're not getting any until those two monsters are asleep."

"I know that."

I looked at her skin now, noticing her scars and the fact she was a lot thinner than before she left. I went over and ran my hand over the surgical scars below her ribcage. I winced at the thought, then ran my fingers beneath her belly button where Rob had stabbed her; the skin was smooth, "I'm kinda trippin' out because you're finally here. I was still all messed up because you were gone...it's all jumbled up in my brain right now."

Naomi took my hand from her hip and held it in her own, "There's nothing to be jumbled and confused about because I'm here now, baby."

That's when the tears came. My eyes let loose, tears rolled down my cheeks. Her arms pulled me into the third hug of the day, her hands fisting my shirt, her face buried into the crook of my neck. I cried against her's, silently. I swallowed and let the tears fall and wet her skin, "Shit, sorry," I mumbled thickly.

She hushed me, "It's okay, Peter."

Again and again my stomach flip-flopped. I squeezed her against me, "Please don't leave again."

Naomi giggled, "I'm never going to leave unless I have to. I love you guys too much."

I pulled back a little, "I need reassurance because I love you so much and I can't trust my mind. I feel like this is a dream and when Benji comes in here jumpin' on the bed and wakes me up I'm gonna be really mad."

Naomi cupped my cheeks, her eyes boring into mine, "I'm right here, Pete. This isn't a dream. I promise."

She leaned forward and kissed me, breaking any fear and worry I had. I exhaled and kissed her back, my hands grabbing her bottom and pulling her closer to me. It was a rush to be so close to her, having not had a moment like this in ages, I needed this.

Then we heard, "Ew!"

Naomi broke away and laughed, "Get out of here."

Benji made a face at me, "You is gross."

"You are, babe," she corrected him.

Naomi slipped away from me and I groaned inwardly. I looked down at my crotch, "Shit."

Again, she laughed, "Benji, go to the living room, okay? Daddy'll be out in a second."

"You's not gonna kiss again, is you?"

"No, we just need to talk for a sec," Naomi ushered him out and shut the door.

"That kid, man, he's gonna kill me," I exhaled.

Naomi returned to me and kissed my cheek, "Go easy on him, he's nosy like you."

"Well I knew when my folks went into the room together, and closed the door, I wasn't supposed to go in there."

Naomi shook her head, "We weren't gonna do anything anyway."

I sighed and looked down at my crotch again, "I have to go to the bathroom and deal with this."

Naomi hummed, her eyes casting downward, "Sorry about that, love."

I was ready to retort when she kissed me. I sighed against her mouth, groaning, feeling her tongue roll against mine quickly. She broke away with a small giggle, "That's all I can offer you right now."

"I went 5 months, I can go another night."

She kissed me really quick, "Just a few short hours - if Benji doesn't want to crash with us."

"Oh God, please Benny Boy, do daddy a solid," I prayed to myself.

Naomi laughed, "Get goin', I hate keeping them waiting. Like you, they've waited 5 months to have me."

I nodded, "Sorry."

She shrugged, "No harm done."

Naomi and I parted, I left the room, trying to hide my crotch, hoping the boys wouldn't see. It's hard to explain this, especially since they're so little and just learning about their own anatomy. Lew would've understood, but Benji, he loves to ask questions. Sometimes I think he knows more than he actually does and likes to see me squirm, which makes me laugh when I think about it.

"Daddy!" Benji jumped out at me from his room, "We playin' now?"

"Tell Lew to make some popcorn, I'll be out in a second."

Benji hummed and hopped away, yelling, "Lewis, daddy said make popcorn!"

I shook my head and rushed into the bathroom.


The boys had fallen asleep at the end of the second movie we watched. Naomi and me carried them to their rooms, tucking them in before retreating to our room. My stomach was doing flips again, all throughout the movies I couldn't stop myself from watching Naomi and wanting to kiss her. I felt like I was in a dream still, I was sure of wake up at any moment and she'd still be in prison and I'd be by myself. But it felt real when Naomi grabbed me by the hem of my shirt.

The door closed behind us, I locked it with fumbling hands, rushing to touch her. The door locked and my lips met hers, we kissed heatedly, stumbling to the bed. My stomach was in the worst tilt, I was so full of love, I could've thrown it up.

Naomi was in complete control, her body was ahead of mine, but she managed to push me against the bed. Our mouths broke apart, we were both panting, her eyes were on fire and it made every sense in my body heighten, "Shit," I mumbled.

Naomi pulled her long sleeve t-shirt off, revealing her bare chest. I swallowed, watching her; she pulled her grey sweats down, leaving her in just her polka dot underwear, it made me smile. She smirked at me, "Your turn."

I pulled my shirt off and kicked my jeans off. We were both bare chested, our bodies radiating lust in the worst way. Her body made me crazy, I could barely stand it, "Do something, baby," I begged her in a wanton tone of voice.

Naomi smiled wickedly, pulled her underwear off and tossed them away; I groaned at her smooth, hairless skin. She stepped to me, immediately straddling my waist, I sighed deeply, "Oh God," I kissed her neck, nipping at her skin, my hands held her hips, squeezing, marveling over every inch. I trailed my hands down her backside while kissing my way up her jaw to her mouth, kissing her softly. Naomi's fingers raked down my back, but I could only focus on what I was doing to her. I just wanted every part of her closer to me, I wanted to be inside of her, and her inside of me, it was such an anxious feeling.

"I want you so bad," she murmured against my mouth.

I picked her up and lay her on the bed, hovering over her. She smiled at me, a real happy grin, again, my stomach was in the worst shape. "You're killing me, Navy," I grunted like a fucking animal.

"I've been dying to kill you," she giggled at me. Then she sat up, "Do what you want to me, Pete, I'm all yours."

I kissed her just as the words left her mouth and began to kiss down her chest. My mouth moving to each of her breasts, paying little attention to them, I had my eyes on a different prize. I couldn't stop the feelings bubbling in me, I was like an animal, I only wanted one thing and I've waited 5 months to get it.

I kissed around her belly, my hands had been holding her hips, I moved them up her sides, rubbing her skin. I kissed along her scars, wanting to feel every perfect part of her. Her legs opened for me, I slipped my body between them, feeling the heat of her against my chest. I swallowed, feeling feral and wound up, ready to devour everything in front of me. I got to her pelvis and bit her skin gently, working her up; she was already murmuring under her breath and sighing, "Goddammit I love you," she spat out.

I slipped down, off the bed, lower between her legs and kissed her left thigh, moving along to her pussy. She moaned, "Fuckin' tease," I only smiled and kissed along her right thigh, moving closer. I even rolled my tongue across her smooth pelvis, earning more moans from her.

"I hate you right now," she breathed.

"Be patient."

"Screw patient," she grumbled, "fuck me."

I chuckled deeply, my throat warmed, "Whatever you want, Navy."

I pushed her legs further apart, my fingers dove in, spreading her wetness open to sink my tongue in. Immediately Naomi moaned loudly, her fingers sink into my hair that was in need to be cut; right now she and I were happy to have it this long so she could pull it. Her nails digging into my scalp only fueled as I continuously sucked and licked my way to getting my girl off. She cried out, one hand left my head; she had gotten a pillow and held it against her face to quiet herself. I buried my tongue as far as it would go, I wanted to taste and feel her so bad, it was an obsession.

Her legs shook and locked against my shoulders, her hips rose and rocked against my face. Her hand left my head, I couldn't see where they went, her whole body convulsed. Then she threw the pillow to the floor, sat up and said, "Get your ass up here."

I got off my knees, wiped my face and climbed over her; she opened her legs and wrapped them around my waist. She didn't hesitate to kiss me and wrap her hand against my throat. Her tongue slipped into my mouth, tangling with mine, exploring so deep, it was like we were trying to swallow each other whole. Naomi broke away, her fiery eyes staring into mine, I could only feel love and lust, "Fuck me."

I only nodded and guided myself into her, her eyes still locked onto mine as she moaned. Her mouth dropped open and that sweet sound poured out, then her eyes closed over, "Fuck me," she repeated, only murmuring it softly.

I buried myself deep into her and began to thrust hard, rocking the bed with our bodies. Naomi's eyes shut tight, she bit down hard on her bottom lip, her nails found their way onto my shoulders and dug in. I grunted and held all I had in, I couldn't came so fast, I didn't want to; I had to make it last.

I knelt on the bed, on my knees, sat up and grabbed her hips. I slowly rocked, building our climaxes, but it was hard from how fucking crazy I felt and how good Naomi felt around me. I leaned over her again, on top, hovering and propping up, I moved my hand to cup her jaw and kiss her deeply, building the tension in our bodies. Naomi broke away, grunting, "I can't take it, it's...so--fuck! Right there!" Her head fell back and her nails ran down my back and gripped my hips, "Faster!"

I did as she said, abandoning all control. We both needed a rush and to get off and patience was gonna work here. I threw all the slowness out; I picked up the pace and fucked Naomi, just like she wanted. I buried my face in the crook of her neck, muffling my own groans and moans by sucking. I was leaving my mark, my hips rocked harder, the bed hit the wall hard, and Naomi cried out, "Fuck! Fuck!"

She tightened her muscles around me, my stomach flipped and I couldn't take it anymore, "I'm gonna cum, Navy," I panted deeply.

Naomi whimpered, "Go ahead."

I pulled out and came on her stomach, grunting and fisting my hands in the sheets. Naomi whined, "No, I'm--"

I entered her again, hearing her laugh and moan, "I love you."

"I love you too," I panted even more.

My hips rocked against her fast until her hips rose, she cried out again as she came. Her muscles were like a vise around my dick, I came again, deep inside her. We were both spent; I laid on top of her, making a mess between our stomachs.

Naomi kissed my forehead and cheeks, "I missed this so much."

"Shit, me too."

Her fingers brushed through my hair, the sweat on our bodies made us stick to each other. I looked at her and smiled, she smiled back, "I can't believe I'm home."

"Me either, baby."

She sighed contently, "I'm so tired."

"Me too, we gotta save some energy for tomorrow."

"What're we doing tomorrow?"

I bit at my lip, "We're gonna go see all your friends and shit right?"

I didn't want to tell her about the welcome home party. It was a secret and everyone was gonna be there. Naomi had no clue.

"Yeah," she nodded, "I needa see Rae and get my hair cut, she'll be happy to chop it up," she giggled at her own joke.

I smiled, "I'm so happy to see you laugh, Navy."

Her fingers scratched my scalp, "It feels good."

I sat up and then looked down between us, "Fuck I made a mess."

"You sure did," Naomi sat up, and climbed off the bed, "Oh my god, my thighs hurt."

I grabbed my boxers from the floor, "Sorry."

"Don't be sorry, I loved it," she winked.

I got up and helped her to the bathroom where we got into the tub to wash ourselves up. We had laid in the hot water, quietly enjoying alone time together. Naomi had laid with her back on top of my chest, my arms around around her waist, and her hands rested on mine.

She began to play with my fingers, "I want to get married soon."

"When?" I asked.

"April," she murmured, then giggled, "April Fool's Day."

I laughed with her, "That'd be awesome. But, I was thinking about Valentine's Day."

Naomi froze for a moment. I was a little worried I had done something wrong. She looked back at me, "I don't want to...not that day."

I thought for a moment, "Why--" then it hit me. "Oh...shit. Sorry."

"I don't want that day to intermingled with the day we marry. I don't want to be reminded of the worst day of my life with one of the best."

I nodded before she looked away, "I understand, Navy."

"This Valentine's Day, I don't want to watch TV or get online, I don't want to be reminded of that day. It's bad enough I have scars."

I kissed the back of her head, "Yeah, okay, Naomi. You got it."

"Thanks," she murmured.

"I only wanna make you happy, Navy, that's all," I told her softly.

"I am happy," she looked back at me again. "I only want to be with you, and our boys. That's when I'm the happiest."

"Ditto."

She laughed softly and faced forward, "You know what else could complete my happiness?"

"Yeah?"

"A new puppy."

I chuckled, "A puppy?"

"Yep, a little dog. Another addition to our family."

"Sure, why not?"

"Maybe you can take care of a dog until we have another baby."

I grinned, "I can deal with that."

"Good, we'll get one this weekend."

I kissed her head again, "For sure."