You Can Fight Fate, You Just End Up Losing

TANNER

She looks insanely beautiful on the ice. Her hair blowing around her face as she skated around the rink a puck on her stick. She was thinking about something, her brows were furrowed and her tongue stuck out slightly from between her lips. She kept the puck on the edge of the stick pushing it around like it was nothing, hockey came second nature to her something that I had been jealous of when we were younger. She had all this talent and the furthest she could go with it was the few colleges that had women’s hockey. It wasn’t fair. She actually loves this sport, and has more talent than the majority of the guys playing today and she can’t do what she loves.

She’s beautiful.

“Hey” she said stopping in front of me. “What’s going on in that pea sized brain of yours?”

“Pea sized?”

“Shhh. What are you thinking about?”

“You” I said seeing her smile.

“Well then” she replied kissing me, “aren’t you just a charmer?”

“I learned from the best.”

“Don’t blame Uncle Max for this one. This is all you Tanner” she joked. “You’re smarter than people give you credit for. You are.”

“When you say things like that I actually believe it” I admitted holding her to my chest. She’s my best friend. Our mom’s would always say that we were made for each other, that it all worked out like a divine plan for us to have each other our whole lives.

“Because I don’t lie to you Tanner. I have no reason to lie to you.”

“I know Addie.”

“Tanner” she said her finger nails scratching my neck lightly something she did to comfort me when we were younger. Or was it to comfort her?

“Why do you do that? You’re putting me to sleep.”

“It relaxes me. Do you not like it?”

“No I like it, but you’re putting me to sleep” I said sighing sleepily. “I want to see your costume.”

“You want to see my costume?”

“Yes.”

“When is the party?”

“Tomorrow after the game.”

“Then I think that you can wait until tomorrow after the game” she said moving towards the boards. I skated behind her placing my hands on her waist. “Hey.”

“Hey” I whispered pinning her to the side of the rink. “Are you sure that I can’t see the costume early?”

“Yea I’m sure. You’re not going to charm your way into seeing it early either” she replied as I smiled against my neck. I shook my head slightly moving her hair out of the way before kissing the back of her neck. “Tanner. As much as I love this, really I do, it’s not going to work.”

“Damn” I whispered, “Are you hungry?”

“Yea, a little. Let’s go to the store and I’ll cook” she said before pausing a while. “Tanner, you’re making my heart race.”

“You’re making my heart race, Addison” I said turning her in my arms. She slid her arms up around my neck again letting her fingers run into my hair. She’s great. I’m an idiot for waiting this long to be with her, if we would have gotten together in high school then we would have gone to the same college, and been together every day. Hell we might have even been engaged or married by now, thinking about having babies. Babies with Addison. My heart is going faster now, if possible, but not in fear like I would have thought. Babies with Addison would be wonderful, little green eyed bronze hair carbon copies of my Addie.

“Are we just going to stand here?” she whispered. “Not that I have anything against just staying like this for a while.”

“I’m just enjoying the moment Adds.”

“Me too Tan” I smiled against her hair. “I almost don’t feel bad for having to break up with Neil now. I love this too much to feel bad Tanner.”

“You’re not the only one Addie” I said.

“What are you thinking about?” she asked pushing my hair back.

“You, me, us.”

“Oh, yea?”

“Yea, just wondering if we would have gotten together sooner where we’d be.”

“Like what?”

“If we would be together still, engaged maybe married by now.”

“What?” she smiled, looking up at me.

“If we got together when we were younger would we still be together? Married or about to be?”

“Tanner” she cooed. “Why don’t we just focus on the dating thing first then talk about the future in the future. . .”

“Yea that’s probably a good idea.”

“Although the thought of little carbon copies of you, Tanner.”

“Yea? Because copies of you Addie, would be amazing.”

“Shhh, little Tanner’s not me.”

“Adds, I want copies of you. I want so many little Addison’s running around.”

“Tanner, we just agreed to try this relationship and you’re thinking about babies and marriage. It’s a little much.”

“Sorry.”

“Just slow your roll Tan” she said hopping up to sit on the wall by the benches, her feet dangling a foot from the ice. “Our mom’s are going to freak out when they hear about this” she added with a smile.

“Yea they’re going to love it. Your dad might not be as receptive” I said resting my hands on either side of her.

“Yea daddy isn’t the biggest fan of me dating what so ever. But I think that you might be the exception. Daddy knows how much you care about me, like in high school when you punched that jerk Justin in the face”

“He was a bully and kept talking shit in the locker room” I said getting angry just thinking about it. “You went out with him for a month and he was going around telling everyone he banged Sidney Crosby’s daughter.”

“I never did Tanner. . .”

“I know.”

“I’ve never . . .”

“What? Never Addie?”

“Never. It didn’t ever seem right Tan” she said looking away from me.

“Wait, you’re a virgin?” I asked wrapping my head around it. “How is that even possible?”

“Well Tanner I just haven’t had sex alright!” she said looking at me like I was accusing her.

“Whoa Addie. Sorry that came out wrong. I’m just surprised is all Adds. I can’t imagine anyone not wanting to have sex with you. You’ve had relationships. Why not do it?”

“Unlike the majority of the population Tanner sex isn’t just a means to an end for me. It’s way more than that. I’m not a person who just sleeps with someone to sleep with them. I’ve never felt that comfortable with anyone. . .” she said trailing off, “This is awkward now Tanner.”

“Hey, I’m sorry I reacted that way” I said holding her face in my hands. “It’s not awkward, if it is it’s my fault. I shouldn’t be surprised that you would want it to mean something special, not just sex.”

“Well yea . . .” she said still avoiding eye contact with me.

“So, Garrett, you guys were dating for what 4 or 5 months. And you didn’t ever. . . Nothing.”

“He never really wanted to, then I found out he was really into boys so yea.”

“Oh wow. Well damn. That sucks. Not really but.”

“Why exactly are we talking about this?” she said finally looking at me. Her eyes searching mine.

“Addison, just because Garrett didn’t want to sleep with you doesn’t mean that others don’t. It doesn’t mean that I don’t want to. I’ve wanted to for a while, mostly since the beginning of summer.” She laughed slightly. “Seriously, you looked gorgeous Addie.”

“Shut up.”

“What?”

“Shut up. You’re a bad liar . . .”

“Not lying. I seriously was trying to not think about how hot you got. It was difficult.”

“Tanner, I thought we were going to go have dinner and then we start talking about me never having sex and how hot you think I am, which is bull. Seriously Tan.”

“What you’re hot ok. I think you’re hot. Smokin’ hot. I hope that we do get married and have lots of kids because that means I get to . . .” I said pulling her towards me her legs on either side of my waist, being careful with the sharp skates on her feet.

“Tanner! I am not having sex with you!” she said loud enough for it to echo a little. She wrapped her arms around my neck holding me as close as she could her lips hovering over mine for a millisecond before she pulled away laughing softly.

“Hey now” I said pulling her back to me, pressing my lips to hers. She sighed backing up a little a small smile playing on her lips. She placed her hands on my biceps as I lifted her off the wall setting her on the ice lightly. “Let’s get dinner Addie.”

“No cooking?”

“No, restaurant. I want to take you to dinner. Then possibly drinks. . .”

“Which means you’re going to dance with me” she said her smiling widening.

“No, you know I don’t dance . . .”

“With anyone but me” she winked.