Punching in a Dream

I awoke in my room, the shades were pulled down tightly, Grayson was by myside snoring. I got up slowly, trying to remember what exactly happened the night before. My stomach growled as I made my way through the house to the kitchen. Daddy was frying up some eggs, the smell over whelmed me. I wanted to vomit.

"You're awake." He said softly. I kept my gaurd up as he walked closer to me. "You hungry?" Not anymore. I shooked my head, locking my gaze with his. Grayson was behind me now.

"I am." He said joyfully. What the fuck is this?

"What do you think you are doing?"

"Making eggs?" Daddy looked back me, the look in his eyes frightened me.

"You haven't gained back my trust, therefore you can leave."

"You are still my daughter-"

"I am an adult now, Daddy. I can take care of myself. Please, get out."

"Juniper, you need me." His voice was strained. My heart skipped in fear. "Get out of my house!"

"Juniper. He is right. After everything that happened last night, with the truth being revealed & all, I think you do need him." Grayson's voice was unconvincing. The fact that he took Daddy's side in this made my stomach turn more.

"Fine. But I am going to work. I'm late."

I made my hair up in a nice long poney tale with a bright red bandanna, ripped up light blue jeans, & a white tank top with some navy blue TOMS. I ran out of the house & started the truck, trying desperately to get away from here. Schizophrenia? Split personality disorder? That can't be right. I grabbed my phone, looking at all the unread messages from Pieper & Gabe. I hit send.

"Blick's Art Studio, this is Gabe speaking, how may I help you?"

"Gabe! This is Juniper."

"Juniper? Where have you been? Where is Grayson?"

"It's a long story. I'm not coming in today. Okay? I will work over time when I get back. I just really need to do this."

"Do what?"

"I'll explain whenI get back." I hung up the phone & hit Pieper's number.

"Juniper?"

"Pieper...hi." It took her a moment to respond to my voice. Tears burst in my bottom eyelids, I held to hold my hand over my mouth to keep from sobbing. "Where have you been? Why haven't you returned my calls? Did your dad find you?" Her voice was frantic but filled with elation. I took a deep breath, trying to calm myself. "Yeah, he found me."

"Is everything going to be okay now? Are you coming back home?"

"Did you know?"

She paused. I could hear her breathing through the cell phone, "June..."

"Don't all me that. That isn't who I am!"

"You know now?"

"I know everything. How many days has it been since I left Detroit?"

"It's been two months."

My breath caught in my throat, my lungs began to ache. My finger nails dug into my thighs, things became fuzzy. "Juniper, I called him. I called him to go get you. I was worried something like this would happen, or worse."

"It is worse."

"Why? What happened? What did you do?"

"I'm pregnent." Tears rolled down my cheeks fast, I realized I was still in the drive way. Pieper's breathing stopped, I could hear her trying to contain herself. All the pain that I felt, all the struggles that I endured, were a lie. I am not Juniper. I am not June. I'm a fucking freak. "Pieper, I need you to listen to me. Okay?"

"Okay," she whispered. "I am going to get help. I want this baby. I want to be with Grayson."

"Juniper, you need to understand that the reason why no one believed you about your dad is because they knew your condition. You slept with many & claimed that all those people were one as your father. I stood by you because I knew that one day you'd realize that the stories that you constituted were all a plan to try & forget that dark passenger of yours." She was contempt, even confident.

"They were not lies!" The world was darkening, I couldn't breathe. "I'm not speaking to Juniper anymore. When she comes back, be sure to call me." The line went dead. I screamed in anger, my hands slapped against the horn, eveerything was going red. I felt Grayson's grip around my torso, I kept screaming, trying to fight the darkness that I was pulling me under. "Make it stop!" The voice in my head is taking over, I don't want a life like this. Everything that I have lived through was a lie, a story line that survived off of calamities, I'm not a real person, I am a mental who can't live a normal life. I am endowed with the inability to feel real happiness. What about my baby on the way? What will happen to him, or her? Will they get that schizophrenic gene from me? I could never let someone else live through that, let alone my child. "Kill me! Kill me now!" I was pushing & shoving against Grayson's chest, trying desperately to end this. Grayson didn't say a word to me as Daddy restrained me, he couldn't even look at me. Daddy grabbed my jaw, making me look at him.

"Juniper, you need to listen to me. This isn't healthy, we need to get you help."

"What are you talking about?"

Daddy lifted me up over his shoulders & took me to the copper. Grayson was right behind us, soundless. I've caused enough trouble, I've caused enough pain & disappointment, there is no point in me trying to live in normality. I tried that, got pregnent, & broke Grayson's heart.

When I awoke, the clouds were blackened & covered the sun. It was a dark dawn. Grayson & Daddy were talking softly, strain tainted their voices.

"Do you think this will help her?" Grayson's voice was doubtful.

"This has to help her. She will get treatement, she will give birth, you will be able to live a happy life with her, if you choose to stay, when she gets out."

"What happened with her in Detroit?''

"Her mother died of cancer, & Juniper went through a series of rebellions & isolation issues. She had no friends for 7 years of her life, she relied on violence & sexual contact to keep her other side contained peacefully. Eventually when she was old enough to do what she please, she slept with many people, most of them dangerous strangers, & claimed that I was the one who she was with. It ruined my reputation as cheif of the police station for a while, but finally, I got her tested & found out the issue. It was a shock. I was never the best father, I was distant from her because of how much she resembled her mother, & how I could never relate to any of her social problems. She pushed farther & farther away from me. She came up with this plan to get away from Detroit. Her only friend is Pieper. She knows just as well as I do what is wrong with Juniper. He other side has many of her own qualities, but has this malicious, sinister craving. It's a sociopath. When she left, I was worried that something like this might happen. Not the pregnency, but her falling in love."

"She loves me?"

"At first, I was convinced that she was incapable of loving someone. But when she met you, I knew that you might break that theory; & you did. Your only hope of ever being able to fully love her is getting her through treatement. If you give up on her, who knows what will happen. I know that there is a ton of pressure on you, Grayson. But she needs you. I need you. The baby needs you."