Status: Complete
The Randomest Collection of Stories about Pretty Much Anything You Can Create a Story About
Chapter 5 of That-Story-I-Don't-Have-Cuz-Emma-Stole-It-And-Hasn't-Given-It-Back-Yet.
Once upon a random time, Flea of the Red Hot Chili Peppers was walking through an enchanted forest full of unicorns, fairies, dwarves, and Shrek The Final Chapter.
Suddenly Flea came across a tree, and shrieked at what he saw. Winnie the Pooh was hanging from the tree! DEAD!
"Who would do this?" Flea cried. He was about to go into severe depression, but then he remembered he was FLEA!!! and had magical powers. So he brought Winnie (or Pooh....whatever you wanna call him), back to life.
"Oh botha," said Winnie in an extremely creepy accent that no one can recognize except for my other best friend besides Xia, named Alyssa. "All I wanted to doo was give sum honee to Kangah, and young Roooo." (YES, I KNOW KANGA IS SPELLED WRONG. THAT'S HIS ACCENT TALKING. GEEZUS.)
"There are no cameras on you, dude. You can say whatever you want here."
Winnie just nodded, gathering from his head a thought that didn't involve honey (all 1.74 of them.) Finally, he said...
"ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS JUST TRIED TO RAPE ME!!!!!!!!!!!"
Flea sighed. Thios was, like, the billionth (aka 2nd) time he had heard something obscure tried to rape/threaten to kill somebody. Like Billie Joe and his kid almost got murdered by Mr. Rogers. Ever since that fateful day, Billie Joe could only write about his imaginary friends on their random adventures, named Jimmy, The Jesus Of Suburbia, Whatsername, Christian, and Gloria.
Now it was a CHIPMUNK?
"....Can chipmunks really rape bears?" asked Flea finally.
"Yeah, you fcking RETARD!!" yelled Winnie. "Cuz it just HAPPENED!!"
Flea just nodded slwolyu, and then backed away quietly into the bushes. What no one knew was that he was secretly ordering Alvin and the Chipmunks to rape useless animals from the Hundred Acre Wood.
PS I'm sorry to Alyssa, as she is probably crying/extremely offended by now. It's okay. They'll forever be in our hearts...Winnie, and his.....friends.
Suddenly Flea came across a tree, and shrieked at what he saw. Winnie the Pooh was hanging from the tree! DEAD!
"Who would do this?" Flea cried. He was about to go into severe depression, but then he remembered he was FLEA!!! and had magical powers. So he brought Winnie (or Pooh....whatever you wanna call him), back to life.
"Oh botha," said Winnie in an extremely creepy accent that no one can recognize except for my other best friend besides Xia, named Alyssa. "All I wanted to doo was give sum honee to Kangah, and young Roooo." (YES, I KNOW KANGA IS SPELLED WRONG. THAT'S HIS ACCENT TALKING. GEEZUS.)
"There are no cameras on you, dude. You can say whatever you want here."
Winnie just nodded, gathering from his head a thought that didn't involve honey (all 1.74 of them.) Finally, he said...
"ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS JUST TRIED TO RAPE ME!!!!!!!!!!!"
Flea sighed. Thios was, like, the billionth (aka 2nd) time he had heard something obscure tried to rape/threaten to kill somebody. Like Billie Joe and his kid almost got murdered by Mr. Rogers. Ever since that fateful day, Billie Joe could only write about his imaginary friends on their random adventures, named Jimmy, The Jesus Of Suburbia, Whatsername, Christian, and Gloria.
Now it was a CHIPMUNK?
"....Can chipmunks really rape bears?" asked Flea finally.
"Yeah, you fcking RETARD!!" yelled Winnie. "Cuz it just HAPPENED!!"
Flea just nodded slwolyu, and then backed away quietly into the bushes. What no one knew was that he was secretly ordering Alvin and the Chipmunks to rape useless animals from the Hundred Acre Wood.
PS I'm sorry to Alyssa, as she is probably crying/extremely offended by now. It's okay. They'll forever be in our hearts...Winnie, and his.....friends.
♠ ♠ ♠
Do you think this is something Flea would do in real life?Alyssa loves Winnie The Pooh.
Winnie The Pooh doesn't have an accent when he's not on TV.
I know this is the 2nd chapter five, but was I REALLY supposed to keep track of that?
Dedicated to Alyssa. Once again, sorry for your childhood loss.