Tell Me Lies

When I open my eyes to the sun escaping through the windows, I'm completely oblivious to the warmth wrapped around me, spooning my bare body. All I've noticed was the way the sun was slightly setting, wondering why I fell asleep in the middle of the day.

Suddenly it comes back when I turn and find Seth. He wasn't asleep, he was awake, wide awake like he couldn't stop thinking about what we just did...Shit, what did we just do?

"Seth," I start, moving in his arms to be suddenly kissed by him. His lips lingered on mine for a moment, giving me a warmth of happiness with just that kiss.

"I can't believe we just.." Seth trails off, with a smile and stares at me adoringly, I smile back, the guilt panging through my chest, but I ignore it. Theirs no way he...No way.

"Me either." The arms around my waist tighten as I feel a pair of lips touch my shoulder, pecking it up to my temple. Despite the deep shit I'm in, I shiver and enjoy the pleasure he gives me.

"To think we could've done this so," he kisses my temple again, "So, much sooner." Our fingers lace together, and I turn to look into his eyes again, the look he's been giving me non stop was something that belonged to someone who imprints on me. Someone like Paul, or Lucas, not someone like Seth.

"Seth," I start, toying with his fingers, "I have to ask you something." I tried to make my statement as less suspicious as possible.

"Ask me anything," he holds me tighter and I smile a bit softly by the way he's on cloud nine by all of this.

"When you first saw me, in two years," I start carefully, lacing my fingers through his, "How did that feel?" My neck arches a bit more, meeting his brown eyes filled with curiosity.

"I felt," The look came back to his eyes, "I felt so happy," I smile a bit at this Seth continues, tightening our fingers, "All I could ever want right then and there was to kiss you."

With that Seth leans in, stealing another kiss. My stomach drops with...I have no idea, Guilt? Happiness?

"It felt," Seth continues, keeping his eyes closed "Different"

"Different?"

Our fingers disconnect and , Seth meets eyes with me, he's hopeless and love struck. My conscience was screaming at me telling me that I shouldn't have messed with his feelings like this.

"I felt sick when I first saw you, like I couldn't breath, it was frightening but so enjoyable."
This reminds me of Lucas' story of when he first saw me, when he first laid eyes on me, it sounded, so, so familiar.

"Oh my god.." My hand goes to my mouth with a gasp and I sit up quickly, holding the blanket to my bare chest. No, no he can't be-

"What?" Seth sits up behind me, placing a hand on my shoulder. He was so clueless, even I figured it out, and I just got here, I turn to meet his confused eyes, and look away, tears ready to fall out from full on guilt.

I just screwed with Seth, full on screwed with him and his mind.

"N-nothing, really." I trail off, making my reply as detachable as possible. Seth's hand on my shoulder grew to and arm around my waist, pulling me to his naked lap.

"It can't be nothing, Esther, come on, I know you." His chin rests on my shoulder and I turn to look at him, pretty sure he caught the guilt running through my body.

"I just needed to know." I whisper, looking away, running a hand through my brown spirals, I continue without thinking. "If this was the right idea."

Seth stiffens, and I don't look back, not wanting to know how he felt about that, I bite my bottom lip and force the tears to not come out.

"Of course it was, I had an amazing time." With Seth's tone, I can tell he was a bit hurt, making me feel worse.

"Me too.." I whisper, trailing off a bit, it sounded like a lie, but honestly, it wasn't.

"But." Seth says, and this time I turned to look at him, meeting nothing but his head full of hair since he was dropping his head.

"But what?" I ask lightly, his head raises and he arches his eyebrow, intensing his sexiness by fifty percent.

"I know you too well, Esther, there's something bugging you, you have something on your mind." Seth and I have known each other since ever and even though I know this, it still surprises me how much Seth knows me.

"I-don't" I pause giving up on my lie.

"Esther, don't lie to me," He takes in a deep sigh, and makes sure our eyes meet, " Especially after this."

I shake my head and bite my lip, the taste of Seth still lingers there.

"NO, no more confessions, or it will end up with sex again." I say, making Seth smile a bit, gripping me towards him, my bare back feeling every ripple he had on his chest.

"And is that a problem?" I turn to look at him, giving me a boiling sensation to my stomach, he leans in to kiss me but I move a bit, placing my hand on his chest, nudging him away.

"..yes, it is." I say, giving him the full eye contact, and he gives me his pained expression back, breaking me.

"It is?" Seth's voice sounded so painful that it slices through me, his grip on me loosens, and I take that as an opportunity to move out of them. He rests his elbows on his thighs and places his head into his hands.

"Seth, I have a fiance," I say lightly, "And another imprint."

"Paul doesn't even want you!" Seth yells, its not as painful and Paul's or as soft as Lucas' It didn't even sound like Seth wanted to hurt me.

"Do you honestly think Paul will be okay with you sleeping with his imprint?!" Seth's eyes meet mine for a moment before he drops his head lower.

"Did you even ask if he was over me?" my voice lighter than before.

"I didn't need to ask." Seth's mumble was a bit harsh, and I looked at him shocked.

"Fine then tell him we fucked-" my sentence stops as I see Seth stiffen, it's bad enough I regretted it, now I had to call it a fuck, I hold my words in a bit, then regain my thoughts, "I-I-"

"Esther, let's not do this-" Seth sits up, ready to leave off the bed, but I grab his wrist and try to yank him, which was really no use.

"It's either now or we'll never get back to this."

Seth looks into my eyes, both of them, searching for something in them.

"..OK," He sighs out. and I look at him shocked that he gave in so quickly, if this was Paul..

"OK?" I question, still shocked at his agreement to me. Seth eyes my reaction to him agreeing to me, and sit comfortably next to me, facing me a bit before nodding.

"Yes, just keep on going, if that makes you happy," Does it make me happy?

"OK," I trail on, hoping it will make me happy to say it. "Seth, what we just...did, we can't even do it again, ever." I meet his eyes cautiously, hoping he doesn't break down, but to my surprise his expression is unreadable, it's blocked and I can't explain how badly I wanted to read his mind.

"Go on." he says, making me snap back to reality.

"I have a fiance that expects me back in two days, and expects me to marry him," I point out, carefully.

"Alright." he offers to continue.

"Then I have Paul, who's your friend-"

"We never were friends-"

"Who's in your pack," I correct quickly, "That imprinted on me," I saw Seth's mouth open instantly and I slap my hand over his lips before continuing again. "Even if he still didn't leave Rose for me, I can still see him in love with me, it's not hard to see, if Paul ever figures out what we just did, it'll-1- hurt him so much that he'll just die,"

"A bit dramatic." Seth interrupts, and I glare at him a bit before starting again.

"Or-2- ruin any kind of trust we ever had with him,"

"Which still is very little." Seth mumbles under his breath, my tongue clicks and I look into his brown hair.

"Seth,"

"Sorry, keep going." I place my hands to my lap and lace my fingers together, staring at them.

"What we had was," I stop myself for a moment to think of a word to describe it, "It was," I stop again, looking at Seth for a hint, and he holds back a frown.

"Memorable?" Not it "Satisfying?" try again "Come one, at least bearable?" nope

It was....It was..

"A-Amazing." I look at Seth, surprised of my own words, he was shocked by them too, then out popped a proud gaze.

"Then why-" before he asked any other questions I went back to explaining.

"Because if it was okay with Paul, I still have Lucas, I still have to leave and marry him." I search his eyes for anything, but nothing phases him.

"I still have to say 'I Do' and pretend that I still love him no matter what." I tried my best to say it without making it seem like I didn't want to be married, but it was obvious, and Seth caught on to it.

"You don't love him?" He's searching my eyes this time, and I don't hold back any emotions, it's clear that I'm confused, I minus well show him.

"It's...complicated." I tangle the thin white blanket around my body tighter, and Seth slips more into the bed, cautiously touching his hand with mine.

"Like how?" Seth was more concerned with me, I can't tell if it was to try and wiggle his way back in me, or just a moment of complete concern.

"Like cold feet complicated." My confused words of unknown made my head scramble even more.

"Cold feet?" I can tell in his voice, that he was sort of questioning on weather to believe me, if I was making this up to just slip away from a one night stand or just seriously confused.

I look away from him and nod, lacing our fingers together.

"Yes, I still care for him, and always will, but with everything that's going on, that has happened, it's just.."

"Cold feet complicated, got it." His replay short and simple, giving me the idea that he wanted this to be over soon.

"Seth."I start, but Seth drops my hand, shifting his back slightly to me.

"I understand Esther, I'll respect your wishes and stay away from you." I can hear under his sigh there was an 'Again' in it. My heart feels a bit shrunken, knowing that I have broken his heart more than once wasn't a good feeling.

"Seth, theirs just a problem about this whole thing." I start, placing my hand on his shoulder, hoping it would make him turn to look at me, but he doesn't. His tongue clicks and I bite my lip.

"More problems." Seth stands up and look at me, the look of pain, I can tell he was getting annoyed by my feelings. "Couldn't you have just said that it was good and let me hold you until my happy pill was over?" Seth stops, then tosses over his t-shirt and goes to put on his boxer briefs.

"Let me explain this-"

"No, Esther," Seth says sternly, "I'm through with you explaining yourself, which, shockingly, doesn't explain yourself at all!"

I can feel my jaw clench and I run to my my suit case to find a pair of panties, slipping one on and I wrapped my towel around the rest of my body. My pulse throbs through my body as I slip on Seth's t-shirt.

Once I turned around, Seth was already out of my room. I ran to the door and into the hallway, catching Seth's arm. He doesn't fight back ,or push me, he pauses.

"Seth, I-I think you imprinted....on me."

I feminine gasp passes through the hall and we snap our heads to Renessme, holding her gloved hand to her mouth. Great, now I remember why I hated keeping secrets in La Push