To Be Happy Now

"So, we're dating," Alaska said, in the open silence as Jessika did her homework, Max read a magazine, and Irena was crocheting. Alaska was debating on when and how she would tell them since they were the ones who had a big hand in it anyway. She kind of just blurted it out...

All of them looked up at her.

"Austin?" Jessika asked.

She nodded.

Jessika gasped and exclaimed, "NO WAY!"

Irena smiled and she said, "No wonder you look so much happier now, dear."

Alaska let out a laugh. She thought about Austin and how he would love the three of them. She could see him serenading the women with his music, and then talking about sports or something with Max. He would really like them.

"So you finally went through with it?" Jess said, closing her textbook. "You gave him a chance?"

Alaska shrugged. "He kind of found a way to make me not say no, but I've had a crush on the guy since before I was your age, so I couldn't really help myself."

Jessika grinned. "I want to meet him!"

"As do I," Irena winked. "I want to know what all the fuss is about!"

Alaska didn't say anything. One thing she left out--she still hadn't told Austin yet. In her defense, how could you bring that up on a date, when you're supposed to be happy and having fun? Alaska just couldn't find the right time.

Plus, she was happy. She almost forgot that she had ovarian cancer whenever she was with him. Just the other day, he took her to the state fair for the entire day. And before that, after their first date, they made it a routine to watch a movie at his place every Friday night. If he knew, then that would put a damper on things.

"You haven't told him yet, have you?" Max read her mind. Alaska shook her head and he sighed.

"I'm going to, I swear!" She exclaimed, defending herself. "I just don't really know how or when. People take things differently, like my mom continues to make food that she thinks will help make it go away, my brother had become overly protective, my best friend has to call me every single second of the day, my dad..." She sighed. "My dad doesn't even want to speak to me...what if Austin is like that? I have to know him better before I give him a bomb like this."

"She has a point," Irena said, as the other two tsk tsk'd. "It took me ages to tell my Chris about my cancer. Chris was my fiancee when I was diagnosed with breast cancer. It wasn't until the day before the wedding day that I told him."

"What did he do?" Jessika asked, very interested in the story.

"He was angry," Irena nodded. "Furious, actually, but he never left me. He loved me, and he still does. We got married and we're happy now."

Irena looked at Alaska.

"It's all about love, dear. Nothing can get in the way of it unless you want it to."

It was some very wise words. Alaska sighed and she stared out the window, thinking about Austin. She didn't know him well enough to know what he would think about it. In fact, he already lost someone--how would he feel to lose someone again?

Alaska's phone vibrated and she looked down. It was a text from Austin. A flicker of a smile appeared on her face when she read:

I'm at your place now with Ricky. Kind of awkward, don't you think? Anyways, I plan to stay until you get back, so you'll have to see me and say hello ;)

The whole sneaking around thing with Ricky was fun, but she knew she had to tell him soon too. How would he react? His best friend and his little sister? Alaska shook her head and rolled her eyes, sending a text back to Austin.

The nurse came in and unhooked Alaska's tubes. She said goodbye to Jessika, Max, and Irena, and she walked down the hallway and rummaged through her bag for her keys.

"Alaska?"

She looked up and immediately froze.

John stood by the receptionist desk, filling out something on a clipboard and he was giving her a curious look.

"John...hi," she said, completely shocked. "What are you doing here?"

He jerked his thumb behind him to a man and said, "Just signing some stuff for my uncle. What are you doing here...at a cancer treatment center?"

Alaska panicked. What the hell would she tell him? She put the best smile she could muster on her face and she said, without even thinking, "Just...visiting. I know someone with cancer..."

John's eyes travelled down and landed on the blue wristband on her wrist--the one that the patients always got whenever they came in. His eyebrows furrowed and Alaska immediately crossed her arms, hiding the wristband from his view.

"Right, well, I will see you later." Alaska said, brushing past him and practically flying out of the building. Her heartbeat was thundering in her chest and she leaned against her car.

"Oh, my God." She breathed. John would know something was up. No visitor wore the wristband--just the patients. He would know that she was the one getting treated for cancer, not her made up friend.

But the worst thought in her mind? What if he told Austin?