Scream to be Heard

“You better not leave me at another party, Mr. Gaskarth.” I rolled my eyes to his slyly.

“Jesus, Lauren, I’m not going to fucking leave you.” He laughed, the bottle of Jack Daniel’s rolling across his lips. He put the bottle down slowly and stood up. “When do we leave for tour?” Alex turned to Jack and asked. I felt a pang in my gut.

Since the last tour, the boy’s fame had taken a huge roller coaster up hill. I have been living with them for three years. The boys and I had been best friends since 8th grade, and after we graduated I became their merchandise employee, or whatever classy term you would call a “merch girl”. I wouldn’t trade anything in the world for the life I have with All Time Low, but once and a while, (lately) I’ve become somewhat of a mother, and a maid.

“Cupcake,” Jack put his arm around me. He had been calling me cupcake since before I can remember.

“What do you want, Jackary?” I snapped setting down my glass of water, obviously I had been dubbed “designated driver”.

“Alex is just being pissy because he’s drunk as hell. And pmsing.” He added grinning madly. His grin was infectious. Anytime Jack smiled, you wanted to smile as well.

“I just don’t want you all to get soo drunk, that piss face over there decides he should drive home. And then you all get in his car, forget I was even at the party and crash into a tree. Bye bye, All Time Low!” I huffed setting my arms across my chest.

“Hey!” Alex shot up finally realizing I had just called him “piss face”. I rolled my eyes and leaned on the counter.

The party was sketchy. I couldn’t even tell what street we were on, all I knew is that it was underground, and there was a TON of drinking. I had just recently turned 21, and don’t drink nearly as much as most 21 year olds do. Especially, Alex Gaskarth. “Hey beautiful.” Alex winked at a passing girl. She stopped turned around and then adjusted her shirt so that he could see farther down it. A tiny bit of my got upset. I used to be so in love with Alex. We even got really close to dating…That was until All Time Low hit it big, and suddenly short little Lauren wasn’t as appealing as tall, busty Becky. I should have known it would never have worked with us from the start. Yet for some reason I keep a tiny place in my heart for him. I guess that’s why I take his shit.

Alex followed the girl across the room and disappeared. “And that was the last we saw of Alex Gaskarth on the night of October 14th.” Jack shook his head.

“She’ll probably murder him.” Rian shrugged slinking into the conversation. I smiled, Rian was the type of person you could never be mad at, no matter what he did. His girlfriend Kara snaked around his other side and kissed his cheek.

“I don’t know why you all insist on going to these scary clubs.” Kara said looking up at Rian.

“Easy- nobody knows who we are in the hood.” Rian said.

“Don’t get too cocky.” I rolled my eyes again. The scene was beginning to piss me off. “Where’s Zack?” I asked looking across the room. Jack shrugged.

“I’m going to go dance bitches.” Rian said dragging Kara along. Kara stopped and looked at me and rolled her eyes.

“Boys.” She muttered and continued on. I laughed, Kara was my cousin. She was a lot like me, and we had a lot in common. Sometimes I feel like she’s the only one who keeps me sane.

“Are we practicing tomorrow?” Jack asked Zack. Zack shrugged.

“Depends on how hung over Alex is.” He said.

“I gotta piss.” I said and walked and began to walk away from the two boys. Just as I was about to spot a pathway through the crowd, a hand snaked around to grab my ass. I spun around and shoved my water into the man’s face. “What the fuck is your problem!?” I hissed backing away from him.

“You little bitch.” He spat back. “I was just trying to be nice.” He grinned as he got closer and closer to me. My back hit a wall. I could feel tears form in my eyes as fear set in. I wasn’t very strong, in fact I had barely passed gym in high school. My words were what got me in trouble most of my high school life. “You have a nice set of sexy tits, you know that? Girl?” He smirked leaning in close. I could smell his breath, straight booze.

“A nice ass too. An ass like that deserves to be touched.” He slipped one hand to my breast and the other to my butt and gripped hard. I yelped out but no one heard over the noise of the club. It was often I would get hit on in clubs, but no one had ever gone as far as to sexually assault me in public. I squirmed trying to get out of his grasp, as his leathery boozed lips attacked mine. Tears sprung from my eyes and I squirmed and squirmed attempting to scream over the loud bass of the club and lips attacking me.

“You get your fucking slimy hands off of her!” Alex’s voice seethed as he ripped the man off of me. For a guy his size, I was surprised he even budged him, let alone thrown him across the room. I gasped for air and looked across the club at the girl Alex had been with. She looked confused, and pissed off that Alex had left her. I turned back to Alex who was holding the man against the wall by the neck. “You lay one fucking hand on her again, and I swear to God-“

“Alex, It’s okay.” I breathed rushing to meet him. “It’s okay, Alex. I’m okay.” I put my hand on his back trying to calm him down. Alex’s muscles relaxed slowly and he dropped the man. He fell to the floor with a thud. Alex grabbed my hand and rushed me through the grinding crowd. His hand pushed against the wooden door and we were thrust into the cold fall air.

“Are you okay?” He asked brushing back his hair with his hand. I nodded looking down.
“I’m fine. You can go back to that girl.” I muttered rubbing my arm with my hand. I bit my lip nervously, Alex always had a way of making me nervous.

“You’re crying.” He ignored my comment and wiped a tear from my face. His thumb on my face sent shivers down my spine.

“I’m fine Alex. Really, it’s not a big deal.” I continued to rub my arm awkwardly.

“Alright.” He said and adjusted his shirt.

“Thank you.” I squeaked.

“Yeah, okay whatever.” His cocky front came back on and I scowled. “I gotta go find that chick, I hope she didn’t leave.” With that he turned around and went back into the club. A bottle of fury burst inside of me.

Of course, make sure I’m okay and then turn around and go back into the party that I was just assaulted in. I kicked the dirt in front of me and a couple more tears rolled down my cheeks. I crouched on the ground and held my head in my hands. Up until today, that was the first time any of the boys had made a straight attempt to notice me at the party.

It didn’t used to be like that, we used to be like brothers and sister. I used to go to the boys for everything. They were like my personal body guards. And then Nothing Personal came out, and suddenly my friendship went down the tubes.

“Lauren!” Jack called from inside the door. “Come back and join the party!” He said, clearly not understanding the severity of the matter I had just gone through. Nevertheless, I entered back into the pot filled booze hungry party, and attempted to enjoy the rest of my evening.