Waiting for Life to Begin

I'm falling to pieces.

4 days. 4 days of Jack ignoring me. It’s now the 3rd week of April and I’m getting slightly annoyed. By slightly, I mean severely pissed off. What the fuck did I do wrong? He won’t answer my texts or calls, he won’t talk to me in lessons, he sits at the opposite end of the table at lunch, he runs to the bus before I can give him a ride home, he leaves his house in the mornings before I get there…I don’t understand what I did wrong! I’ve supported him all through his troubles, right? I can’t remember upsetting him.

Unless…he figured out that I like him and he’s so disgusted by it that he’s avoiding me.

Fuck.

Wait, no, Jack would’ve said something to Alex if he knew, and then Alex wouldn’t have been able to resist poking fun at me for it. No, it can’t be that. It must be something else that I’ve done. But what though?

I’m going to do it. Today. I’m going to force Jack to talk to me. It’s my 18th birthday – he can’t refuse me today, right? That’s right, it’s my birthday. I’ve been organising over the past couple of days with Rian how we’re going to celebrate, seeing as Jack won’t talk to me, and as much as Alex and Rian keep telling me to just corner him, I have to plan it out first. I can’t just pounce on him (as fun as that sounds) without knowing what to say, can I?

But now I know what to say. And I’m going to make Jack talk to me again.

After opening my many lavish presents from my parents – they overspent their money, as always – I got to school quickly. I knew Jack would be here early, and I want to get this over early in the day so I can enjoy my birthday knowing that Jack won’t be mad at me.

After a little while of searching, I smiled when my eyes landed on Jack walking down a fairly empty corridor away from me. Good. He can’t use the excuse of too many people around to not talk to me. Here goes nothing.

“Jack!” I called loudly.

Jack flinched slightly, but didn’t turn around. Hell, he didn’t even stop walking. I scowled and jogged towards him. Dick. I know he’s ignoring me on purpose.

“Jack, turn around, I know you heard me,” I repeated, a little angrier this time.

I smirked as Jack did what I said, but my smirk dropped at the sad look on his face. What happened? Did the homophobes on the football team attack him again? No, I would know. I would know, right? When I reached him, I quickly scanned his face for bruises or wincing, but found nothing. Okay. That’s good.

“Are you going to listen to me?” I asked.

Jack just nodded, biting his bottom lip.

“I don’t know what I’ve done wrong, or what I did or said to upset you, but I’m sorry. I hate it when you ignore me, Jack, and I just want you to be back in my life like normal. I promise I’ll make it up to you, whatever I did. Please stop ignoring me. Please tell what I did wrong so I can make it right,” I said firmly.

Jack looked at me, really looked at me, for a couple of seconds, before he bowed his head slightly.

“It’s not you, it’s me,” Jack said quietly.

Oh wow, that old line? Jeez.

“Really?” I asked, raising an eyebrow, unimpressed.

Jack sighed, a slight look of embarrassment washing over his face.

“I-I didn’t want to face you in case you hated me for kissing your cheek,” Jack mumbled.

My jaw dropped slightly. W-What? Is that what he really thought?!

“How could I ever hate you, Jack?” I exasperated.

“But I kissed your cheek!” Jack whimpered.

I swallowed heavily, fighting to keep the blush from my cheeks.

“There are plenty of other things that have happened recently that would’ve made me hate you way more than a little kiss would,” I said softly.

“Oh. There are?” Jack asked weakly.

I sighed, running my hand through my hair. That's not what I meant. This is not going the way I thought it would.

“I’m going to say this once, and once only. I will never run away from you. I will never ignore you. I will never hate you. Okay? Never. You’re my best friend, Jack. Nothing will ever be more important than that,” I said seriously.

Jack chewed his bottom lip but nodded, but I didn’t really feel like he’d accepted what I’d said. When will he understand that I will never leave his side?

“I’m just…I’m sorry,” Jack muttered.

“Don’t be,” I murmured.

“What?” Jack frowned.

I cleared my throat. Whoops.

“Nothing. Um, are you coming out with us to the bowling alley to celebrate my birthday tonight?” I asked.

Yeah, a bowling alley. It's going to be fun!

“Depends who’s going,” Jack shrugged.

As if I’d ever invite any of the guys that attacked him.

“Just you and me. And Rian, Danny and Matt. And Alex, Evan, Grieco and Vinny. And Evan’s girlfriend and two of her friends. Not many people,” I explained.

“Not many people,” Jack mused.

I chuckled. Okay, so it’s a few more than ‘not many’, but it’s not exactly a massive party, is it? Just low key. Just the people that I trust around Jack. All for Jack.

“So are you coming?” I asked, cocking my head to the side.

“I think I can make it,” Jack smiled.

“Pick you up at 6? We’re going to get food before,” I said.

“Sounds good,” Jack nodded.

I bit my bottom lip as another idea came to mind.

“You can stay over too, if you want. I don’t know how late we’ll be out,” I suggested.

Jack’s mom hates it if he comes home late during the week. And what Jack doesn’t know is that the air bed has a puncture. I totally didn’t tear a hole in the side of the extra bed with one of my dad’s camping penknives. Completely innocent. And what kind of friend would I be if I let him sleep on the sofa, alone, downstairs? He’ll have to share the bed with me. What a shame.

“I’d like that,” Jack murmured, blushing slightly.

I’d like it too. Much more than I care to admit out loud.

“Great. Uh, we’d better get to class. See you in Chemistry?” I said, shifting my backpack further up my shoulder.

“Yeah, see you,” Jack grinned.

I smiled to myself as I watched him walk away, before turning and walking to my own French class. At least Jack isn’t mad at me. Now I just have to make sure no guy stares at him inappropriately tonight. I may not want to admit my feelings for him, but I’m sure as hell not going to let any other guy step in. Fuck no.
♠ ♠ ♠
So Zack nearly blew his secret...whoops!
At least Jack's talking to him again.
Will Zack ever make Jack understand that he's not going anywhere?
College acceptance letters come in the next update, and Zack has a little drama...

Thank you to everyone who commented on the last chapter! 168 subs? Amazing! I'd love it if a few more of you commented so I could thank you by name =]

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