Status: kEEP oR kILL?
Live. Laught. Love.
Chapter 1
Growing up wasn’t easy for me. My family weren’t the best role models at all.
My parents where sent to jail for blackmailing there boss. They where con artists, they got him to cheat on his wife with my mom. They got caught and the judge said they where setting bad examples from their kids.
He wanted to give them a light sentence, so that one day they would be able to see us at some point in are lives but after it was found out that they had done this before he couldn’t allow them to mess up another family or life.
So, He throw the book at them, eight counts of extortion, seven counts of theft, and a shit load of other things that at this point I can or don’t care to remember.
The judge said that do to my parent lack of care for others and the fact that they show no willingness to refrain from their ways he would not be going lightly on them.
Two years from each count of extortion and one year for each count afterward, that leaves them just south of 25 years.
The judge apologized to us and said that went people do bad they must be punished and that we shouldn't have to suffer but we will.
In the end the state sent us to live with my mother’s cousin, my uncle Rick A.K.A Rick the Dick. He owed everybody he knew money and was a total bastard.
I guess it comes from mom's family. It like runs in there blood to be screw up. Lucky for me I don't act or remember much about them, just that they where all losers. Most of them where either in jail or drop outs,drunks, and drugies.
My dad’s family didn’t want ain’t thing to do with us.
They didn’t like my mother and thought she was the reason my father was bad but truth is that Alexis told me that dad’s family where ones they pick up the extortion from. That the only different is that dad’s dad or my grandfather was and probably still is an Embezzler. He stole probably millions from his job.
Alexis says there’s a lot of dark secrets in our family most of which I didn’t care the know about. Sometime I wonder how she even know.
Then there’s Rick, he was a college drop out, which I learn was very rare in my mom’s family that they’d make it past high school or even have good enough grades to go to college.
He drop out after freshman year because of a drug problem, don’t feel bad he got caught dealing them by a professor.
A shit load of problems later, most of which he cause himself, he was a closeted drunk working at a Howard’s Lamp making factory.
When he didn’t get what he wanted or just got to bored, he would drink and when he drank he would beat the crap out of us. Until the state took us way again.
Apparently, someone told them and they decide to do a drop in visit.
The house wasn’t very clean, we hadn’t been fed very well, not mention my brother Joey had a black eye, Alexis had a bad case of the flu and closes that didn’t fit because we where sharing them and I had bruises up and down my arms and legs.
I had gotten beaten from playing with the fan and Joey got the black eye from trying to protect me.
So my sister, my older brother and I where sent back to fostercare. The only problem was that my brother was what you would call to old. He was twelve, my sister was nine and I was six.
The unwritten rule of of adoption is the older you are the less likely you are to get adopted. All of the kids know it.
It’s like ten times hard to get adopted and there where three of us which made it even harder.
The older child the hard it was to get a home.
Girls had a better change of get adopted if they where young then thirteen and boys best changes where before the age of ten.
Him being that old and the fact that the judge said to keep us together made it near to impossible to get adopted.
My brother being the sweetest kind of person told them they could put me and my sister up for adoption without him as long as they kept my sister and me together.
That next week my sister and I where adopted. That was the last time I saw him. I was seven, my sister was ten and my brother was thirteen.
The funny thing is those people that adopted us where crazy. They seriously into the bible and where really strict. So being at the tender age 12 and 15 we had lost are cute new factor.
My sister and me where seen back because they thought my sister was possessed. She pulled a scene right out of the Exorcism of Emily Rose with a little of the original Exorcism.
She waited until we got to church one Sunday and start to ‘speak in tongues’ and started whip lashing around on the ground.
Coral our Foster Mother started shaking Alexis to make her stop but Bill, our Foster Father pulled his wife away think it was real. Coral knew better because she stay at home all day with us and knew Alexis was a faker and an attention seeker.
Bill went to work most of the day then to the bar then he came home. The only time we ever really spent time with him is during the Holidays and went he need to punish us or chruch.
Bill and I had spacial connection because as Bill put it, I was a sneaky little snake who need to be watched and punish twice as hard, so he did. He calmed I was manipulative like the snake a trick Eve in the Bible.
However, I never really lied. I just didn’t away tell the complete truth and I made up a lot of stories the suit my needs and sometime Alexis. It was more of a defense the a habit. So yeah maybe I was a little manipulative but I didn’t mean to be.
They tried to keep me, Bill said I could be saved but Alexis was just done for, Coral agreed saying that she was just plain evil but the state said together or nothing so to avoid anything else happening they sent us both back.
When we got back to the foster home are brother had left because he had problem with the other boys but they wouldn’t tell us when it happened or where he was.
Years past and I pick up some useful life skills like; how to pick a lock, how to get out of hand cuffs, how to create a good alibi, how to sneak out of a two-story window, how to shop lifted, how to lie convincingly, how to fight, and Sarcasim as a Language.
My sister ran away right after we got back to foster home. I hadn’t seen her in a while so when I heard she was living in Miami, I went straight there.
She let me stay with her but her boyfriend, whom by all accounts was a dick. He’d flirt at me but I definitely didn’t flirt back, he try to kiss me and when I told my sister she’d just made excuse and give me in attitude.
(Two days Ago) Blake’s beach side apartment place.
I had to leave Miami because thing got out of hand.
Alexis went work at her favorite store, which she only work at to get the news stuff. Blake’s family is wealthy and he spoils her all the time. His trust-fund basically take care of everything.
It was the day after they had had this big ass party and a big ass fight. I’m always up early and I decide the place looks like pig seine and because I’m nice and appreciated Blake lets us live here free of charge, I mean beside the fact that he’s banging my sister. I’m going to clean up a little, a very little, seeing as no one else does.
Well while I’m clean up that fucking asshole came up behind me and grabs me around the waist. He thought it was so funny but I don’t like to be touched and I damn sure don’t want to be touched by him. he plays to rough and doesn’t know went to stop.
The last time he only stop because his friends came over. That time he had ripped my shirt and nearly bloodied my lip and kept smacking my ass.
So, I freak out hit him. He likes to fight, he get into them all the time and wins a lot of them. I think I’ve only ever seen him lose 5 out of the 30 fight. Since I’ve lived here and I’ve heard stories of him kicking lot of ass all the time.
Sometimes the guy scares me a little cause I don’t have a death wish. I can fight and I’m okay at it but I’m no match for someone like him.
What I mean is he like 5,11, 160 pounds all muscle and what am I. I’m 5,5.5, 105 pound basic muscle for a girl. Yeah he towers over me and he out weights me by like 45 pounds.
I fought back and we knocked around the kitchen. We keep going and end up in the living room on the couch.
He’s on top of me, egging me on to fight back better and i try. He ripped my t-shirt again and has my legs pinned.
he got my hands above my head and said. “Come on. If I where some kind of pervert I could have hurt you by now.” He was laughing. The best I could come up with was “ YOU ARE!”
“I am what?” He leaned in to my mouth to hear me better. “ A Pervert. Now get the fuck off of me.” I throw my knee up and try to knee him in the nuts.
He blocked and countered by putting his knees down between my legs, it keeps my legs apart and me pinned.
Know I’m scare. I don’t like this, I don’t want to fight and to be honest this position makes me nervous. He plays like he’s trying to tickle me but it doesn’t feel right. His hand feel like there everywhere at once. “ Stop it. God! I fucking hate you!Let Me GOOOOO!”
He leaned down to my ear and said “Oh come, on that’s noway to talk to me. I'm just having a little fun.” I try to wiggle out of his hold but get nowhere.“Well, I’m not having fun. So get off.” I wiggle some more.
This time when he leaned down his hand push up what’s left of my shirt.“ But I like playing with you. Your way more fun then your sister and I bet if I showed you what your missing you won't be able to get enough of me.”
I tried to see if he was kidding. It's not a very funny joke but he always jokes like that. It’s one of the reason I hate him.
I tried to look in his eyes but at this point leaned more and kissed me neck. “You know I wondered if your like your sister and get turned on be the same things. Like...” Then he started to kiss randomly all over my neck.
I dug my nails into his and my hands so hard it caught his attention. “Ooooohhhh. So, you like to scratch. I like that. You know what. Why don’t you tell me all the things you like and I'll give you each and everyone of them.” I whimper a little and he laughed.
That really pissed me off. I don’t like to feel weak but I do and I don’t like this as on top of me but he is but of all I want to whip that stupid
look on his face off.
“Fuck you! Asshole!” I screamed at the top of my lungs. “Oh, If that’s what you want? I didn’t know. I would be more then happy to do that” I don’t like this.
It not safe and I’m completely sure that he might actually do that to me. If only I could get one of me hands free but I can't he's like dead weight and with out it its a dead cause.
We struggle some more and fell on the floor. I got my hands free but there’s know space to move and he’s still on top of me. I’m pinned between the couch, him and the coffee table.
He’s still kissing my neck and I feel him lift my hip up and start to pull down my pj shorts. So, I start hitting him in the head hard as the space I have will allow.
That start too annoy him so he pins one of my arms and continue to pull down my shorts.
Then it hits me my legs have got to be together for him to do that.
So, I through my knee up as hard as I can and crumble right on top of me, grabbing his nuts. I punched him in the face and push him off of me and crawl away.
I got up and ran down the hall wall. I can hear him coming after me. I knew he was going to hurt me if got the chance.
He’s got a snap temper and doesn’t like to lose and as it stand right know I won.
I ran into their bedroom and closed the door behind me. I crawled of the bed grabbed his aluminum baseball bat.
He ran in after me and I hit him pretty damn hard. He knocked out, I don’t think I killed him but he’s not going to like it when he goes to get up.
When I went to put the bat back under the bed I notice a box of letter one of them had my name on it.
Almost all of them where addressed to me. They where from my brother.
He was living in New York and kept referring to it as his new life. His name’s Joey. In one letter, he told me to come stay with him and so that's when I decide to leave.
So, here I am on train to Georgia, were I was going to hitch hike to South Carolina and a friend is going to get me a ticket to Pennsylvania. From there on I think I going to take the bus.
I’ve missed Joey for so long. I wonder if has missed me as much as I missed him? I wonder what he's been up to all this time?
Then I it hit me and I pulled put the letters and looked for the one where told me to come live with him. It was over year old. What If his invitation isn’t still open?
My parents where sent to jail for blackmailing there boss. They where con artists, they got him to cheat on his wife with my mom. They got caught and the judge said they where setting bad examples from their kids.
He wanted to give them a light sentence, so that one day they would be able to see us at some point in are lives but after it was found out that they had done this before he couldn’t allow them to mess up another family or life.
So, He throw the book at them, eight counts of extortion, seven counts of theft, and a shit load of other things that at this point I can or don’t care to remember.
The judge said that do to my parent lack of care for others and the fact that they show no willingness to refrain from their ways he would not be going lightly on them.
Two years from each count of extortion and one year for each count afterward, that leaves them just south of 25 years.
The judge apologized to us and said that went people do bad they must be punished and that we shouldn't have to suffer but we will.
In the end the state sent us to live with my mother’s cousin, my uncle Rick A.K.A Rick the Dick. He owed everybody he knew money and was a total bastard.
I guess it comes from mom's family. It like runs in there blood to be screw up. Lucky for me I don't act or remember much about them, just that they where all losers. Most of them where either in jail or drop outs,drunks, and drugies.
My dad’s family didn’t want ain’t thing to do with us.
They didn’t like my mother and thought she was the reason my father was bad but truth is that Alexis told me that dad’s family where ones they pick up the extortion from. That the only different is that dad’s dad or my grandfather was and probably still is an Embezzler. He stole probably millions from his job.
Alexis says there’s a lot of dark secrets in our family most of which I didn’t care the know about. Sometime I wonder how she even know.
Then there’s Rick, he was a college drop out, which I learn was very rare in my mom’s family that they’d make it past high school or even have good enough grades to go to college.
He drop out after freshman year because of a drug problem, don’t feel bad he got caught dealing them by a professor.
A shit load of problems later, most of which he cause himself, he was a closeted drunk working at a Howard’s Lamp making factory.
When he didn’t get what he wanted or just got to bored, he would drink and when he drank he would beat the crap out of us. Until the state took us way again.
Apparently, someone told them and they decide to do a drop in visit.
The house wasn’t very clean, we hadn’t been fed very well, not mention my brother Joey had a black eye, Alexis had a bad case of the flu and closes that didn’t fit because we where sharing them and I had bruises up and down my arms and legs.
I had gotten beaten from playing with the fan and Joey got the black eye from trying to protect me.
So my sister, my older brother and I where sent back to fostercare. The only problem was that my brother was what you would call to old. He was twelve, my sister was nine and I was six.
The unwritten rule of of adoption is the older you are the less likely you are to get adopted. All of the kids know it.
It’s like ten times hard to get adopted and there where three of us which made it even harder.
The older child the hard it was to get a home.
Girls had a better change of get adopted if they where young then thirteen and boys best changes where before the age of ten.
Him being that old and the fact that the judge said to keep us together made it near to impossible to get adopted.
My brother being the sweetest kind of person told them they could put me and my sister up for adoption without him as long as they kept my sister and me together.
That next week my sister and I where adopted. That was the last time I saw him. I was seven, my sister was ten and my brother was thirteen.
The funny thing is those people that adopted us where crazy. They seriously into the bible and where really strict. So being at the tender age 12 and 15 we had lost are cute new factor.
My sister and me where seen back because they thought my sister was possessed. She pulled a scene right out of the Exorcism of Emily Rose with a little of the original Exorcism.
She waited until we got to church one Sunday and start to ‘speak in tongues’ and started whip lashing around on the ground.
Coral our Foster Mother started shaking Alexis to make her stop but Bill, our Foster Father pulled his wife away think it was real. Coral knew better because she stay at home all day with us and knew Alexis was a faker and an attention seeker.
Bill went to work most of the day then to the bar then he came home. The only time we ever really spent time with him is during the Holidays and went he need to punish us or chruch.
Bill and I had spacial connection because as Bill put it, I was a sneaky little snake who need to be watched and punish twice as hard, so he did. He calmed I was manipulative like the snake a trick Eve in the Bible.
However, I never really lied. I just didn’t away tell the complete truth and I made up a lot of stories the suit my needs and sometime Alexis. It was more of a defense the a habit. So yeah maybe I was a little manipulative but I didn’t mean to be.
They tried to keep me, Bill said I could be saved but Alexis was just done for, Coral agreed saying that she was just plain evil but the state said together or nothing so to avoid anything else happening they sent us both back.
When we got back to the foster home are brother had left because he had problem with the other boys but they wouldn’t tell us when it happened or where he was.
Years past and I pick up some useful life skills like; how to pick a lock, how to get out of hand cuffs, how to create a good alibi, how to sneak out of a two-story window, how to shop lifted, how to lie convincingly, how to fight, and Sarcasim as a Language.
My sister ran away right after we got back to foster home. I hadn’t seen her in a while so when I heard she was living in Miami, I went straight there.
She let me stay with her but her boyfriend, whom by all accounts was a dick. He’d flirt at me but I definitely didn’t flirt back, he try to kiss me and when I told my sister she’d just made excuse and give me in attitude.
(Two days Ago) Blake’s beach side apartment place.
I had to leave Miami because thing got out of hand.
Alexis went work at her favorite store, which she only work at to get the news stuff. Blake’s family is wealthy and he spoils her all the time. His trust-fund basically take care of everything.
It was the day after they had had this big ass party and a big ass fight. I’m always up early and I decide the place looks like pig seine and because I’m nice and appreciated Blake lets us live here free of charge, I mean beside the fact that he’s banging my sister. I’m going to clean up a little, a very little, seeing as no one else does.
Well while I’m clean up that fucking asshole came up behind me and grabs me around the waist. He thought it was so funny but I don’t like to be touched and I damn sure don’t want to be touched by him. he plays to rough and doesn’t know went to stop.
The last time he only stop because his friends came over. That time he had ripped my shirt and nearly bloodied my lip and kept smacking my ass.
So, I freak out hit him. He likes to fight, he get into them all the time and wins a lot of them. I think I’ve only ever seen him lose 5 out of the 30 fight. Since I’ve lived here and I’ve heard stories of him kicking lot of ass all the time.
Sometimes the guy scares me a little cause I don’t have a death wish. I can fight and I’m okay at it but I’m no match for someone like him.
What I mean is he like 5,11, 160 pounds all muscle and what am I. I’m 5,5.5, 105 pound basic muscle for a girl. Yeah he towers over me and he out weights me by like 45 pounds.
I fought back and we knocked around the kitchen. We keep going and end up in the living room on the couch.
He’s on top of me, egging me on to fight back better and i try. He ripped my t-shirt again and has my legs pinned.
he got my hands above my head and said. “Come on. If I where some kind of pervert I could have hurt you by now.” He was laughing. The best I could come up with was “ YOU ARE!”
“I am what?” He leaned in to my mouth to hear me better. “ A Pervert. Now get the fuck off of me.” I throw my knee up and try to knee him in the nuts.
He blocked and countered by putting his knees down between my legs, it keeps my legs apart and me pinned.
Know I’m scare. I don’t like this, I don’t want to fight and to be honest this position makes me nervous. He plays like he’s trying to tickle me but it doesn’t feel right. His hand feel like there everywhere at once. “ Stop it. God! I fucking hate you!Let Me GOOOOO!”
He leaned down to my ear and said “Oh come, on that’s noway to talk to me. I'm just having a little fun.” I try to wiggle out of his hold but get nowhere.“Well, I’m not having fun. So get off.” I wiggle some more.
This time when he leaned down his hand push up what’s left of my shirt.“ But I like playing with you. Your way more fun then your sister and I bet if I showed you what your missing you won't be able to get enough of me.”
I tried to see if he was kidding. It's not a very funny joke but he always jokes like that. It’s one of the reason I hate him.
I tried to look in his eyes but at this point leaned more and kissed me neck. “You know I wondered if your like your sister and get turned on be the same things. Like...” Then he started to kiss randomly all over my neck.
I dug my nails into his and my hands so hard it caught his attention. “Ooooohhhh. So, you like to scratch. I like that. You know what. Why don’t you tell me all the things you like and I'll give you each and everyone of them.” I whimper a little and he laughed.
That really pissed me off. I don’t like to feel weak but I do and I don’t like this as on top of me but he is but of all I want to whip that stupid
look on his face off.
“Fuck you! Asshole!” I screamed at the top of my lungs. “Oh, If that’s what you want? I didn’t know. I would be more then happy to do that” I don’t like this.
It not safe and I’m completely sure that he might actually do that to me. If only I could get one of me hands free but I can't he's like dead weight and with out it its a dead cause.
We struggle some more and fell on the floor. I got my hands free but there’s know space to move and he’s still on top of me. I’m pinned between the couch, him and the coffee table.
He’s still kissing my neck and I feel him lift my hip up and start to pull down my pj shorts. So, I start hitting him in the head hard as the space I have will allow.
That start too annoy him so he pins one of my arms and continue to pull down my shorts.
Then it hits me my legs have got to be together for him to do that.
So, I through my knee up as hard as I can and crumble right on top of me, grabbing his nuts. I punched him in the face and push him off of me and crawl away.
I got up and ran down the hall wall. I can hear him coming after me. I knew he was going to hurt me if got the chance.
He’s got a snap temper and doesn’t like to lose and as it stand right know I won.
I ran into their bedroom and closed the door behind me. I crawled of the bed grabbed his aluminum baseball bat.
He ran in after me and I hit him pretty damn hard. He knocked out, I don’t think I killed him but he’s not going to like it when he goes to get up.
When I went to put the bat back under the bed I notice a box of letter one of them had my name on it.
Almost all of them where addressed to me. They where from my brother.
He was living in New York and kept referring to it as his new life. His name’s Joey. In one letter, he told me to come stay with him and so that's when I decide to leave.
So, here I am on train to Georgia, were I was going to hitch hike to South Carolina and a friend is going to get me a ticket to Pennsylvania. From there on I think I going to take the bus.
I’ve missed Joey for so long. I wonder if has missed me as much as I missed him? I wonder what he's been up to all this time?
Then I it hit me and I pulled put the letters and looked for the one where told me to come live with him. It was over year old. What If his invitation isn’t still open?