I See Your Name in Lights

This isn’t going to be too bad, I thought to myself. I hadn’t expected to talk to anyone all day; contact with peers had been a bit awkward for me for the past few years, ever since...

No need to think about that now, I scolded myself. Don't ruin the only good mood you might have today.

I swung my backpack onto the table that was placed between two comfy-looking chairs in the back of the library, lazily picking through one of the shelves until I found something interesting. Within what felt like minutes, the bell for first lunch rang. I didn't so much as look up for the time. I stretched, happy to have a break, and then yawned loudly. I flinched, half-expecting to hear a piercing 'quiet,' but I was the only person in the room; there wasn't even the stereotypical old librarian perched in front of a computer.

This made me feel even more comfortable. I lounged in the chair with my legs propped up on the table, and then placed the book over my eyes to combat the fluorescent lights above me. I woke with a jolt to another bell - was that the one for my lunch?

"Damn it," I hissed, waking myself up and setting the book down. I snatched my wallet that I'd hid in my bag, and then raced out of the library and into a slew of people. I looked up at a clock - no need to be so worked up. It was only the release of first lunch. Why was I so stressed out about this? I stuck my hands in my pockets and leaned against the library's doors, watching my peers as they chattered loudly and stepped all over each other. Soon, there was a figure that leaned against the door with me.

"Did you get yourself out early?"

“It’s drama,” He told me. “No one’s going to notice I’m gone. So I just slipped out.”

I shrugged. That was good enough for me. I pointed over at the cafeteria. “You want to go now?”

He shrugged, as well, and then led me down the hall as a few last students exited. “So how was the first half of your study hour, Alex?”

“Well, Jack, I had a lovely nap,” I smiled widely at him, rubbing it in. “How was your first half?”

“I sat and watched idiots improv,” He huffed. “I hate it.”

“Why’d you take the class, then?”

“Did you hear what class it is?” Jack laughed quietly. “All I have to do is sit back and watch people make asses out of themselves for an hour.”

I smiled. “I’d actually enjoy that.”

The lunch bell for us rang as we entered the café, I scooped up a slice of cardboard-like pizza I’d been dreading, along with a ripe-enough-looking apple. Jack chuckled to himself. “You actually eat this?” He trailed me as I paid, following behind me empty-handed.

I poked the crust of the pizza – it was cold. “Probably not,” I mumbled to myself, continuing to walk as I stared down at my tray.

“Hey, follow the guy who actually knows where he’s going,” Jack pulled my arm slightly, making me realize I was about to walk into a group of girls. I raced to stand behind him when he sat down. He sprawled out on the chair lazily, then pulled up one from the table behind him and beckoned to me. I plopped into it and dropped my tray onto the table.

He asked me about the hour I had before gym – again, bringing up the fact he was sorry for causing my nose to bleed my first day – and was shocked to learn I was in such an advanced class. The guys I’d recognized as Zack and Rian sat at the other side of the table, having an intense conversation about a new skateboard. I paid little attention to them, focusing solely on the strange, lanky guy in the chair next to me, not even touching what ‘food’ was on my tray.

“So…” He paused as a girl sat next to Rian, getting dangerously close to him with a girly smile and feely hands. Jack switched his gaze back to me. “Where did you transfer from?”

I blushed slightly. “I’ve been homeschooled for a few years.”

He cocked his head. “And you still understand all of this stuff?”

“It wasn’t just that, I did a lot online, too,” I said quickly. “I just…”

“I guess that makes sense.” After a moment, he furrowed his eyebrows. “Then why’d you come to school now?”

“My parents told me it was time to go back.”

“Where’d you go before that then?”

I half-smiled at him, a bit embarrassed. “In a little school in England.”

“I knew it!” Jack’s face lit up. “How long…?”

“Since I was a kid. I had to be maybe eleven when we came to the states,” I explained. “I’ve been stuck at home ever since. Just hadn’t wanted to go back, you know? People suck as a whole.”

“Lucky bastard,” He pouted. My mind began wandering, studying his facial expressions. They were different, adorable even.

No. No they’re not, what am I thinking?

I shoved the pizza into my mouth, instantly squeezing my eyes in regret. I swallowed the bite anyway, punishing myself for using the word ‘adorable,’ even if it was in my own mind.

“Who’s this?” The girl across from us asked.

“This is Alex. He’s new,” Jack announced. “I’ve decided to take him under my wing.”

“After making him –” Zack started.

“Can we drop that?” I hissed.

“It’s the least I can do.” Jack beamed at Zack.

“He sits next to Zack in lit,” Rian stated randomly.

“You’ve met him too, then?”

“Yeah, he’s alright.”

“Well, thank you,” I sighed, taking another bite.

“I’m Kara,” The girl smiled happily. “How’s your first day?”

“Aside from a sore nose and a crack in my false pride? I’m having a great day,” I joked. “I’m kidding. I’m having a better day than I thought I would, by a long shot.”

“Why’s that?” Jack asked me, a friendly smile sprawling onto his face.

You, I thought.

The bell rang loudly, and as if we were being herded, the entire room cleared into the hall like the door was a funnel.

I stood and tossed my tray into the trash can next to our table after saving my apple, taking out a big bite. It was bitter, so I spit it out and cursed at it, running back to throw the apple away, too. I turned quickly, not wanting to walk through the crowd on my own. I ended up running into him, causing him to fall backwards slightly, surprised. I outstretched my arms to stop him from stumbling, and I pulled a little too hard. He raised his arms to my chest, steadying both of us. He shot me an awkward smile, then after a moment, we let go of each other.

"So... What are you doing after drama?" I asked, beginning to walk with him to the almost-empty hallway.

"Going up to Spanish."

"That's convenient," I chuckled. "Yo tambien."

He raised an eyebrow. "Does that mean you are too?"

"¿No escuchas?" I challenged.

"If that's a yes, you're sitting next to me so I can copy off of you."

"If you have to," I grinned. He smiled back, stopping with me at the library's doors. "You'd better get back to your improv."

"Jack grimaced. "What if I have to go, though?"

"Maybe you'll learn a few things to improve your sense of humor," I joked at him, shooting him a sly smile.

He scowled at me. "When will I ever need to know how to be funny onstage?"

"You never know," I told him, chuckling.

My god, I wasn't expecting to be smiling so much. He even had me giggling as if I were an excited little girl.

He let out a groan. "I have to get back, though. You're right. I get another tardy and I'll never hear the end of it."

I nodded. "And I better get back to my nap."

He laughed lightly. "I'll see you later, Alex."

I watched Jack go, a bit sad to see him leave, and then made my way back to the library through the abandoned hallway. My book was still open to the same page on the table, and my bag hadn't been touched. I stood for a moment, realizing that I didn't want to read, puzzled at my sudden apathy. I shrugged the feeling off, then put the book in its place and swung my bag over my shoulder. I didn't want to sit around and decided upon exploring instead.

I walked down the corridor, absentmindedly beginning to open the auditorium's doors as I reached them. I let go of them quickly, scolding myself yet again. Pull another stunt like that and I was going to scare my new friend away. What was going on in my head? I stuck my hands into my pockets, forcing myself to keep walking. I reached the end of the school, finding another wing. I got curious, beginning to venture down. There was a loud noise coming from the right side of the wing - shop class. I looked to the other side; I found a room labeled 'choir,' and the last room to my left had a door that was hanging wide open. I slipped into it silently - an empty band room. I grinned as I found that the teacher's office was dark, I had the entire room to snoop around in. I played around with the chimes near the back of the room for a minute, but soon became unamused. I drummed against a snare lightly with my fingertips as I strolled back to the teacher's room, seeing that there was another door close by it. Another door for the same room? Highly unlikely. I approached it and opened it slowly, holding out my hand and flailing against one of the walls, searching for a light switch. I found a button, smiling at my discovery as it lit up.

There was foam lining the walls - soundproof. Two chairs faced each other in the middle, music stands in front of each. I registered the room as a practice room, with many cases of instruments lining the wall; I got nosey and began examining them. I found a case with a familiar shape, and then almost as if I was hungry, I freed the case from its prison beneath a pile. I plopped myself on the cold floor, opened the case, and smiled at the old guitar I exposed. The body was chipped and I could practically smell the strings rusting, but I could see my grin in its reflection. I cradled it in my arms as if it were my own, softly kicking the case away. I found picks scattered on the floor and snatched two up greedily, placing one on my lap and one between my fingers, soon beginning to pluck the strings.

It was old, but the guitar was in tune. I thanked whatever it was that caused the coincidence of giving me an instrument I loved to play and a soundproof room - I found something to do with my free hour. I started singing minutes later, reminding myself that no one could hear me. I was free to suck, and to suck as loudly as I wanted. I took out my phone after a while - only five minutes remained until I had to go to the next class. I quickly and carefully placed the guitar back in its rightful place; underneath a saxophone case as well as what I'd guess held a clarinet.

I escaped the room without any difficulty, strolling down the end of the hall as if I belonged there. I thought about waiting for Jack until the bell rang, surprising him, but I wasn’t sure if being so needy so quickly in a friendship would freak him out. I slowed my pace, still contemplating it, but ended up at the library’s doors again. I leaned against them – I only had one more minute – and the lunch crowd was let out. I cocked my head to the side, searching for someone, anyone, that I recognized, but failed. II hated not knowing anyone. I was desperately trying to pinpoint the newly familiar skunk-style hair that Jack had worn so well, but I failed, sad to know I had to go it alone. I found a break in the stream, and then placed myself inside it.

I followed the crowd until I had to leave it, molding into another. I reached the top of the stairs with a slight pant and strolled down to my next class, a little bit eager. I nodded at the teacher as she realized my face wasn’t familiar, and then she called me over to her. I was given a packet – ew, a syllabus – and a textbook, then I was told I could sit wherever I liked. I grinned at her, thankful.

“Hey, Alex!”

I turned around to find Jack beckoning for me to join him in the back. I did so obediently, setting my bag on the ground.

“I ended up having to go onstage.”

I snickered at him quietly.

“It’s not funny,” He pouted.

“Hay una pruebita hoy,” The teacher called loudly after the bell. “It’s your first pop-quiz of the trimester. You should know the vocabulary from the first segment.”

The class, including Jack, groaned. I sat, indifferent. I didn’t mind.

After the papers were handed out and I had a pencil in my hand, I etched the answers carefully, thankful for my ability to remember sounds well enough to be confident in my work. I flipped my page over after maybe ten minutes as the rest of the class continued to scribble, including Jack, who had a confused crease in his brow and his tongue sticking out slightly from his lips. I watched him for maybe a few seconds, and then broke out my notebook again, writing about whatever it was I was feeling at that time.

After a few more minutes, his paper loudly crinkling let me know he was finished. I looked up at him from the corner of my eye, and I smirked as he cocked his head. The teacher told us to turn in our quizzes; Jack quickly leapt up to take mine and turned it in for me. I grinned to myself, and then looked back down at the words I'd been writing.

Surprisingly, they weren't as full of fear as they were in the morning. I felt eyes on the paper, so I covered my notebook with my arms quickly to scowl at Jack.

"More poetry about the romantic qualities of the American dollar?"

"Stuff it," I whispered. "I like to write songs, and songs need words."

"So you are writing poetry." He rested his hand on his arm. "You did lie to me again. It's not polite to lie to the only guy who's seemed to take you under his wing."

"It's also not polite to try to break your new friend's nose," I sighed apathetically.

"It was a hell of an icebreaker; you've got to at least give me that."

"You could call it that," I smiled. He looked like he wanted to say something, but the teacher began talking again and cut him off.

"Since I will be gone tomorrow and I won't have time to grade later, I'm going to grade them now. You'll be watching El Rey Leon instead."

"We'll what?" Jack asked me without turning to face me.

"The Lion King in Spanish," I stated simply.

He huffed. "I hate reading during movies."

"At least it's a reason for you to stop paying attention," I pointed with a smile. Jack stared at me for a second, and then his face lit up. "Quit complaining."

The lights turned off, the movie began, and Jack rested his head on top of his folded arms on top of his desk. He almost seemed offended at the music, unable to sing along with the lyrics that had been translated. He expertly hid an iPod underneath his arms and plugged headphones into his ears. It was quiet enough for the rest of the students not to notice as they sat, heads cocked at the projector as we were all mesmerized by the way the character's voices didn't match what we remembered, but I could hear crunchy guitar riffs bleeding through. I angled my head to try to hear what exactly he was listening to, but I couldn't quite tell. I set my head down as well, and he took the hint, stuffing a headphone into my own ear. I mouthed 'thanks,' then pretended to be paying attention to the screen as I fought singing along to the old Green Day tracks he was playing.