Status: Under Construction [:
Behind My Green Eyes
For a Pessimist I'm Pretty Optimistic
Cyclops’ tongue caressed my cheek, telling me to wake up. Honestly, I don’t even know when I fell asleep. I stretched and walked to my bathroom, stripping off my clothes and taking a look in the mirror. The bruises on my ribs looked like they were mashed together since they were bigger now, my cheek looked only slightly bigger than the other did, and the bruise was something I could cover with a little cover up.
I stared into the mirror, looking at the bits of hazel and brown specks throw onto my mossy
green eyes, my mom’s eyes. We were the only two in our whole family with green eyes; everyone else had brown. My mom always told me our eyes were special, they made us strong, and that something about us both were special. She was going to tell me the day she died.
Cyclops purred as she rubbed her fur against my leg, she was tall for still being a kitten. I stepped into the shower, being careful how hard the water hit against my skin, finally letting the tears run down my face until I couldn’t tell I was crying. I cried in the shower where no one could see me cry, because I could let anyone see me, I couldn’t be vulnerable.
I shook Andy’s leg to wake him up and woke up Nikki. I do feel bad for waking them up so early, but there’s no other way I can do it. I dressed Andy in his favorite SpongeBob tee that he wears every Tuesday. Nikki came out in a tight shirt and short shorts.
“Nichole, go back inside there and change. It’s October, it isn’t hot anymore.”
“I don’t care, I don’t get cold.”
“I said change Nichole.”
“You’re not mom.”
“I didn’t say I was, now go back and change.”
She huffed a swear word under her breath before walking back into her room with an attitude. I walked into the kitchen, making Andy a bowl of cereal and laying out Cyclops’ food.
Andy raced out of his room to the kitchen, almost running right into me.
I walked back into my room, pulling out my black long-sleeved work shirt with a white collar and white buttons going all the way down, a black band tee, and black skinnies. My red converse were wearing out a little bit, the white part already turning gray-ish. I had work at five in the morning at Betty’s Café every morning for two-and-a-half hours and then I’d go to school at eight. I’d drop off Nikki and Andy at my neighbor’s house. My neighbor had a girl named Suzie in Andy’s class and he son was a year older than Nikki in middle school. She’d drive them to school every morning and pick them up until I’d pick them up at four. When I’d walk home from school.
“Morning Luna.”
I put on my usual brave face, “Morning Beatriz.”
“I told you to call me Betty, Beatriz is my mom, and she’s old.” She made a face.
I half smiled and walked into the café as soon as she opened it, I walked back to her office
and dropped my backpack and took of my sweater. Betty has only three employees, herself, her niece, and me. Her niece and I go to the same school, we aren’t enemies or anything, but we’re just not that close.
Zoë slid into the little café, “Sorry I'm late.”
“Again?” Betty raised her eyebrow at Zoë. I tied the little burgundy apron around my waste and started working the coffee machines. Betty was working on the cookies and cupcakes. On Wednesdays she let me sell my mom’s recipe mini cakes, no, not cupcakes, but literally, miniature cakes. Zoë and I managed the register and the orders together.
“Hey there Luna.” I turned around at the sound of my name. It was Amanda, my closest
friend since I moved here two months ago.
“Hey you’re kind-of early today. What can I get you?”
“Kind-of? I’d still be sleeping for another hour if my mom didn’t have to go in earlier. Medium double caramel latte with caffeine shot please, oh; do you guys have any of those little chocolate muffins yet?”
“Just out of the oven kido.” Betty shouted from the kitchen.
“Sweet.”
I rolled my eyes and charged her order, “That’ll be $4.89.”
She dropped her bag on the floor and pulled out her Minney Mouse wallet, let me say obsessed, or in her words, loving. “Here.” She handed me a five dollar bill.
“What are you gonna do here until seven thirty Amanda?”
“I have no fucking clue.”
“Did you do the math homework?”
“Come on, it’s me, why do you even ask anymore?”
“Then do your math while you’re waiting.”
“Ew.”
“One double candy latte sided coke shot and Chip Mountain!” Zoë screamed behind me, we invented a language to scream out the orders, and it’s part of the language to scream it out.
I set her cup and pulled a chocolate muffin out of the window and placed it on the counter with a napkin.
“Ooh yum! Will Betty kick me out if she sees me here until you’re done?”
“Nah, she’s seen you enough to know you’re my little minion.”
She smiled and went all the way to the back, I could hear her “mmm’s” from the counter.
I looked up when I heard the bell go off by the door…then I saw who it was. I mentally killed him for the thirteenth time.
“What can I get you?”
He yawned, the veins in his eyes made his eyes red with bags under his eyes. “Large mocha Americano with two shots and three chocolate chip cookies. Do you have the mini
cakes today?”
“No, that’s on Wednesday.” Zoë cleared her throat behind me, “Sir,” I said through gritted teeth.
“Oh, okay then, that’s it.”
“That’ll be $5.67.”
“One tall English stud muffin sided double coke shot and chocolate pancakes!”
He handed me a ten, and I gave him his change before I gave him his order. He walked away to one of the seats farthest on the back, across from Amanda, who was so politely shoving her face into the muffin. When she noticed she looked at me with big eyes.
Dean Hennessey, junior just like Amanda, Zoë, and I. His story is scrambled all the place, I can tell from the energy I read off of him. He’s the school’s lead lacrosse player, and in the running for captain. I don’t really know much, just that he doesn’t take no for an answer, until I came. Last month he publicly asked me to be his girlfriend and I publicly rejected him, I didn’t know I was the first. He publicly set himself up for looking stupid, it just so happened I gave him that extra shove off the cliff. Since then he’s been making my life a hell, completely living up to his words and threat.
I set my apron back in my locker as well as my shirt, only leaving on the band tee and my sweater. I waved to Betty, most of the day would go by slowly and Zoë would go back after schools over. The streets were crowded with everything I saw every morning, stores opening up, people walking to school and their jobs if they’re not in their cars. Kids running around still carrying lunch boxes, making Andy jump into my head with his superman lunch box and that extra cookie I put in for learning to spell his name right and his alphabet.
I saw Amanda from the corner of my eye, her energy shot up quickly and I knew she was gonna tell me something.
“I made the lacrosse team!”
“That’s so awesome! I'm so happy for you.” I stopped and hugged her. She was beaming.
She bowed, “Please, hold your applause.”
I smiled and rolled my eyes, before running into the school doors.
“Oh, didn’t see you there.” The snicker in the voice made it evident to who it’s always been.
“He’s such an ass, all you did to him was say no.”
“Whatever, if he want to be a jerk, I don’t care, it’s not like I like him anyways, or ever will.” A little feeling inside me told me I’d soon change my last words.
I leaned against my locker, holding my books against my chest and staring out at nothing. I wonder if my mom had the same sixth sense I had, maybe that’s what our green eyes were about. That would explain why she always understood what I felt, and sometimes without me even mentioning anything. Was hers stronger than mine, or the opposite?
BRRRIIINGGG! The bell pulled me out of my daydream.
“I’ll see you in lunch Luna.”
I smiled and nodded.
I left my math notebook in my locker and pulled out my glasses. I shut my locker and walked over to science. Today we’d start learning about neurology and the brain’s functions with hormones, but not without a pop quiz about the reading we did in class yesterday.
I took my seat in the middle, literally smack down in the middle of class, it was my awkward position for me to actually pay attention because in the back I know I’ll spend the whole class drawing and all the way in the front is overwhelming to me.
“Miss Andrews, please answer the question.”
I closed my eyes and let my mouth speak freely, “In the situation where a spider bite would infect a person would differ on the location and type of spider. If the time is night and anytime near a main vein like the neck, it’s obvious that he or she would be dead in three hours or less, never being able to wake. Even if they would wake, they would just die because spider bites are most likely invisible on human skin unless a female spider would lay eggs in the skin.”
I could see her jaw hanging while my head were still down.
“Well, thank you Luna, for that amazing explanation.”
I kept my head down, flipping through the text book and getting ahead in my notes for today’s lessons.
“Why Luna, you never lift your head. I know you’re shy, but it’s disrespectful not to look me in the eyes when you speak.”
This is the comment I’ve been avoiding from everyone, I lifted my head slowly, I tried to reach the bridge of her nose with my eyes, but she moved, making me glance in her ice blue eyes. I quickly shut my eyes and looked back down at the book, everything coming to me at once.
Dory Sanson, birthday July 7, 1954. Her two sisters died when she was fourteen, being shot, their names, Elizabeth and Anne. She battled a drug addiction with cocaine for ten years before she was married to Scott Hamilton, who also later died from a heart attack. She lives with four cats and never told her parents she stole money from them every month to pay for the drugs, and never will be able. She has a heart of gold but a wall of concrete cement. She never talks about her past, it brings back nightmares.
I opened my eyes with the images of her brunette sisters smiling at her fourteenth birthday, ten hours before they were shot. A wave of depression and agony hit me all at once. Mixtures of regret and blame.
“Are you okay Luna?”
I nodded, scared to make any eye contact again. I felt a pair of eyes on me, with warmth, I didn’t want to turn and look, a reading was enough for today.
“Aright then, flip your books to page 297; we’re starting a new chapter today, Neurology.”
I hate this blessed curse.
The bell rang to dismiss us to second period, I walked up to her desk; she was grading a few essays from yesterday. “I'm sorry about Elizabeth and Anne,” I whispered to her.
She looked up quickly, shock everywhere in her body. I walked out of the class without saying anything else or a glance.
I stared into the mirror, looking at the bits of hazel and brown specks throw onto my mossy
green eyes, my mom’s eyes. We were the only two in our whole family with green eyes; everyone else had brown. My mom always told me our eyes were special, they made us strong, and that something about us both were special. She was going to tell me the day she died.
Cyclops purred as she rubbed her fur against my leg, she was tall for still being a kitten. I stepped into the shower, being careful how hard the water hit against my skin, finally letting the tears run down my face until I couldn’t tell I was crying. I cried in the shower where no one could see me cry, because I could let anyone see me, I couldn’t be vulnerable.
I shook Andy’s leg to wake him up and woke up Nikki. I do feel bad for waking them up so early, but there’s no other way I can do it. I dressed Andy in his favorite SpongeBob tee that he wears every Tuesday. Nikki came out in a tight shirt and short shorts.
“Nichole, go back inside there and change. It’s October, it isn’t hot anymore.”
“I don’t care, I don’t get cold.”
“I said change Nichole.”
“You’re not mom.”
“I didn’t say I was, now go back and change.”
She huffed a swear word under her breath before walking back into her room with an attitude. I walked into the kitchen, making Andy a bowl of cereal and laying out Cyclops’ food.
Andy raced out of his room to the kitchen, almost running right into me.
I walked back into my room, pulling out my black long-sleeved work shirt with a white collar and white buttons going all the way down, a black band tee, and black skinnies. My red converse were wearing out a little bit, the white part already turning gray-ish. I had work at five in the morning at Betty’s Café every morning for two-and-a-half hours and then I’d go to school at eight. I’d drop off Nikki and Andy at my neighbor’s house. My neighbor had a girl named Suzie in Andy’s class and he son was a year older than Nikki in middle school. She’d drive them to school every morning and pick them up until I’d pick them up at four. When I’d walk home from school.
“Morning Luna.”
I put on my usual brave face, “Morning Beatriz.”
“I told you to call me Betty, Beatriz is my mom, and she’s old.” She made a face.
I half smiled and walked into the café as soon as she opened it, I walked back to her office
and dropped my backpack and took of my sweater. Betty has only three employees, herself, her niece, and me. Her niece and I go to the same school, we aren’t enemies or anything, but we’re just not that close.
Zoë slid into the little café, “Sorry I'm late.”
“Again?” Betty raised her eyebrow at Zoë. I tied the little burgundy apron around my waste and started working the coffee machines. Betty was working on the cookies and cupcakes. On Wednesdays she let me sell my mom’s recipe mini cakes, no, not cupcakes, but literally, miniature cakes. Zoë and I managed the register and the orders together.
“Hey there Luna.” I turned around at the sound of my name. It was Amanda, my closest
friend since I moved here two months ago.
“Hey you’re kind-of early today. What can I get you?”
“Kind-of? I’d still be sleeping for another hour if my mom didn’t have to go in earlier. Medium double caramel latte with caffeine shot please, oh; do you guys have any of those little chocolate muffins yet?”
“Just out of the oven kido.” Betty shouted from the kitchen.
“Sweet.”
I rolled my eyes and charged her order, “That’ll be $4.89.”
She dropped her bag on the floor and pulled out her Minney Mouse wallet, let me say obsessed, or in her words, loving. “Here.” She handed me a five dollar bill.
“What are you gonna do here until seven thirty Amanda?”
“I have no fucking clue.”
“Did you do the math homework?”
“Come on, it’s me, why do you even ask anymore?”
“Then do your math while you’re waiting.”
“Ew.”
“One double candy latte sided coke shot and Chip Mountain!” Zoë screamed behind me, we invented a language to scream out the orders, and it’s part of the language to scream it out.
I set her cup and pulled a chocolate muffin out of the window and placed it on the counter with a napkin.
“Ooh yum! Will Betty kick me out if she sees me here until you’re done?”
“Nah, she’s seen you enough to know you’re my little minion.”
She smiled and went all the way to the back, I could hear her “mmm’s” from the counter.
I looked up when I heard the bell go off by the door…then I saw who it was. I mentally killed him for the thirteenth time.
“What can I get you?”
He yawned, the veins in his eyes made his eyes red with bags under his eyes. “Large mocha Americano with two shots and three chocolate chip cookies. Do you have the mini
cakes today?”
“No, that’s on Wednesday.” Zoë cleared her throat behind me, “Sir,” I said through gritted teeth.
“Oh, okay then, that’s it.”
“That’ll be $5.67.”
“One tall English stud muffin sided double coke shot and chocolate pancakes!”
He handed me a ten, and I gave him his change before I gave him his order. He walked away to one of the seats farthest on the back, across from Amanda, who was so politely shoving her face into the muffin. When she noticed she looked at me with big eyes.
Dean Hennessey, junior just like Amanda, Zoë, and I. His story is scrambled all the place, I can tell from the energy I read off of him. He’s the school’s lead lacrosse player, and in the running for captain. I don’t really know much, just that he doesn’t take no for an answer, until I came. Last month he publicly asked me to be his girlfriend and I publicly rejected him, I didn’t know I was the first. He publicly set himself up for looking stupid, it just so happened I gave him that extra shove off the cliff. Since then he’s been making my life a hell, completely living up to his words and threat.
I set my apron back in my locker as well as my shirt, only leaving on the band tee and my sweater. I waved to Betty, most of the day would go by slowly and Zoë would go back after schools over. The streets were crowded with everything I saw every morning, stores opening up, people walking to school and their jobs if they’re not in their cars. Kids running around still carrying lunch boxes, making Andy jump into my head with his superman lunch box and that extra cookie I put in for learning to spell his name right and his alphabet.
I saw Amanda from the corner of my eye, her energy shot up quickly and I knew she was gonna tell me something.
“I made the lacrosse team!”
“That’s so awesome! I'm so happy for you.” I stopped and hugged her. She was beaming.
She bowed, “Please, hold your applause.”
I smiled and rolled my eyes, before running into the school doors.
“Oh, didn’t see you there.” The snicker in the voice made it evident to who it’s always been.
“He’s such an ass, all you did to him was say no.”
“Whatever, if he want to be a jerk, I don’t care, it’s not like I like him anyways, or ever will.” A little feeling inside me told me I’d soon change my last words.
I leaned against my locker, holding my books against my chest and staring out at nothing. I wonder if my mom had the same sixth sense I had, maybe that’s what our green eyes were about. That would explain why she always understood what I felt, and sometimes without me even mentioning anything. Was hers stronger than mine, or the opposite?
BRRRIIINGGG! The bell pulled me out of my daydream.
“I’ll see you in lunch Luna.”
I smiled and nodded.
I left my math notebook in my locker and pulled out my glasses. I shut my locker and walked over to science. Today we’d start learning about neurology and the brain’s functions with hormones, but not without a pop quiz about the reading we did in class yesterday.
I took my seat in the middle, literally smack down in the middle of class, it was my awkward position for me to actually pay attention because in the back I know I’ll spend the whole class drawing and all the way in the front is overwhelming to me.
“Miss Andrews, please answer the question.”
I closed my eyes and let my mouth speak freely, “In the situation where a spider bite would infect a person would differ on the location and type of spider. If the time is night and anytime near a main vein like the neck, it’s obvious that he or she would be dead in three hours or less, never being able to wake. Even if they would wake, they would just die because spider bites are most likely invisible on human skin unless a female spider would lay eggs in the skin.”
I could see her jaw hanging while my head were still down.
“Well, thank you Luna, for that amazing explanation.”
I kept my head down, flipping through the text book and getting ahead in my notes for today’s lessons.
“Why Luna, you never lift your head. I know you’re shy, but it’s disrespectful not to look me in the eyes when you speak.”
This is the comment I’ve been avoiding from everyone, I lifted my head slowly, I tried to reach the bridge of her nose with my eyes, but she moved, making me glance in her ice blue eyes. I quickly shut my eyes and looked back down at the book, everything coming to me at once.
Dory Sanson, birthday July 7, 1954. Her two sisters died when she was fourteen, being shot, their names, Elizabeth and Anne. She battled a drug addiction with cocaine for ten years before she was married to Scott Hamilton, who also later died from a heart attack. She lives with four cats and never told her parents she stole money from them every month to pay for the drugs, and never will be able. She has a heart of gold but a wall of concrete cement. She never talks about her past, it brings back nightmares.
I opened my eyes with the images of her brunette sisters smiling at her fourteenth birthday, ten hours before they were shot. A wave of depression and agony hit me all at once. Mixtures of regret and blame.
“Are you okay Luna?”
I nodded, scared to make any eye contact again. I felt a pair of eyes on me, with warmth, I didn’t want to turn and look, a reading was enough for today.
“Aright then, flip your books to page 297; we’re starting a new chapter today, Neurology.”
I hate this blessed curse.
The bell rang to dismiss us to second period, I walked up to her desk; she was grading a few essays from yesterday. “I'm sorry about Elizabeth and Anne,” I whispered to her.
She looked up quickly, shock everywhere in her body. I walked out of the class without saying anything else or a glance.