Not Insane

“Merry Christmas everybody! Santa Jimmy is here!” Jimmy shouted as he appeared in the living room of his house dressed in a Santa outfit.

“Jimmy, I really hope you grew that beard out just for this occasion only,” Jayden said with a giggle. “Because you should not have facial hair.”

“I said he looked like Jesus,” Leana laughed.

“Either way, we need to all just unwind and have fun, because we have been just too busy with writing,” Matt said, handing drinks out to everybody.

“I couldn't agree more,” Jayden said while nudging her fiance. “We've barely gotten any of our wedding planned, so you all need to hurry up with this new album.”

All of the guests had split into groups and were engaging in happy chatter. Jayden couldn't help but wonder about her twin's recent changes. Some for the better, and some that just seemed odd. He had recently gotten Lasik done so he no longer had to wear glasses, but his choice of style as of late had been different. He seemed to not really care about how he looked anymore. She just tried to tell herself it was because they had been so busy writing, which was true. The five had been so engrossed in it that occasionally two or three days would pass before any of the women had seen their significant others.

With Christmas finally here, it had been the first time the group had been a whole in at least a few months. The twins' own father had also seemed concerned about his son, often asking Jayden questions about him. She realized she didn't know much because of the guys being so shut off. Leana had told her earlier in the evening that this was the first time she'd seen her fiance in three days because he had been off on his own working on a song. They never asked questions because they'd been around the guys for many years and knew how they get when new album time comes around.

The party continued on for hours until Jimmy had called for everybody's attention. “I wrote this song for our band's new album, and I want to grace you all tonight with it.” He sat on the bench to his piano, and as soon as his fingers began to glide over the keys, a chill went through his twin's body.

Jayden grabbed onto Brian's arm and held it tightly. “Baby, you okay?” he asked, kissing the side of her head.

“I'm sorry, but doesn't that just sound very creepy?”

“Oh, you know Jimmy. You've heard 'A Little Piece Of Heaven,'” he chuckled softly as he wrapped his other arm around her shoulders and listened when Jimmy began to sing.

“Now I think I understand, how this world can overcome a man. Like a friend we saw it through. In the end I gave my life for you. Gave you all I had to give. Found a place for me to rest my head. While I may be hard to find, heard there's peace just on the other side. Not that I could. Not that I would. Let it burn, under my skin. Let it burn. Left this life to set me free. Took a piece of you inside of me. All this hurt can finally fade. Promise me you'll never feel afraid. Not that I could. Not that I would. Let it burn, under my skin. Let it burn.”

Jimmy's voice sang the haunting words beautifully, but Jayden's heart began to race as tears threatened to fall. She was about to run out of the room again until her brother began singing again, softer this time.

“I hope it's worth it, here on the highway, yeah. I know you'll find your own way when I'm not with you. So tell everybody, the ones who walks beside me, yeah. I hope you'll find your own way when I'm not with you tonight. I hope it's worth it, what's left behind me, yeah. I know you'll find your own way when I'm not with you tonight. So tell everybody, the ones who walks beside me, yeah. I hope you'll find your own way when I'm not with you tonight.”

Jayden couldn't handle it anymore. As soon as the song ended, she pulled from Brian's arms and took off running through the group of guests towards the front door. A select few called to her as she opened the door and ran out. Brian and Jimmy were in tow quickly, but were not fast enough as they watched her speed off in Brian's car.

“Shit,” Brian mumbled. “Jimmy, take me home, I need to get her and make sure she's okay.”

“She won't be at your place. Come on, I know where she'll be.” Brian didn't ask as he got in Jimmy's car and he drove off.



Jayden slammed the brakes on the truck before parking it on the side of the road and stepping out. Her cheeks damp with tears, chilled by the breeze that blew in off the ocean. She quickly made her way onto the beach alongside the pier, not caring that it was closed. She followed a familiar path up a hill of sand as far as she could go and sat down, hidden by the pier. Her body rocked while she hugged her knees, continuing to cry. Tears flowed for some time until she had finally calmed down. She had no idea how much time had passed, but jumped when she saw two silhouettes approaching. “Go away,” she called out. “I have a gun on me.”

“Jade, sweetheart, it's us,” Brian's voice approached softly.

“Jimmy, go away,” she mumbled.

“Sis, what's the matter?” he asked as he sat next to her.

She scoffed and slapped his arm. “That song! No offense Jimmy, you sang it beautifully, but for fuck's sake it sounded like a goddamn suicide note!” She shouted before standing up and beginning to storm off, only to be stopped by her fiance who had held her tightly. “Brian, let me go!” She tried to scream at him but her voice had began breaking again.

“Jade, it's only a song,” Brian said soothingly to her.

She continued to struggle in the two strong arms that were wrapped tightly around her. “Maybe to you guys it's a song, but he fucking promised me that he'd never leave me, and now he goes and writes a song like that?”

Jimmy sighed began digging his toe into the sand. “Jay, Brian's right. It's just a song that I wrote. I'm not going anywhere.”

“The date! The date I dreamed about. It's in two days.”

The tall man stood up and approached the couple, cupping Jayden's face in his hands. “Jay, I still keep that promise to you. I am not going anywhere. Dreams or no dreams, I am not going to leave you, and I'm not going to leave my best friends or my family. Why would I? Things are going so great for us, and shit, I just went and had eye surgery so I don't need my stupid glasses anymore. So why would I have a reason to leave?”

Jayden finally had broken down into a sob, nearly going limp in Brian's arms as he helped her sit down in his lap. Brian rubbed her back, trying to calm her while talking to Jimmy. “I do have to admit, the song does sound kind of scary. I can understand why she's upset.”

“Seriously you guys. It's just a song. Jay of all people should know how my mind works.”

“Jimmy,” Jayden called to her brother in a voice barely above a whisper. “I know how your mind works, but how would you feel if you had dreams of me dying and I wrote a song like that?” She asked, not even looking in Jimmy's direction.

Jimmy sighed, letting his body fall into the sand below him. The moment was silent, except for the waves crashing against the shore. Brian continued to soothe his fiance until she had calmed down and stopped crying. Jimmy broke the silence after a while. “I guess you're right, Jay. It was just something that had come to me, and I wanted to write it. I still keep my promise that I'm not going anywhere.”

“I hope so, Jimmy. Brian? Can we go home now?”

“Yeah. Come on. Jims, we're taking off, and if you fall asleep out here, you're gonna freeze.”

“Can I at least get a hug from my sister?” he asked as he sat up.

The three stood up and Jayden wrapped her arms around her brother's waist. While the two hugged, Brian had spoken up. “I think we all should take the next few days off from writing and just spend it at home. You need to spend more time with Lea, like I need to spend more time with Jade.”

“Yeah. I'll tell the others and we'll get back together after the weekend.” He gave his sister a kiss on her head before the two parted. “I love you Jay, and I'll never leave you, okay?”

Jayden nodded before clinging to Brian's arm. They walked out from under the pier and went their separate ways. Jayden showed Brian where his car was parked and sat in the front seat silently as he drove home. She still couldn't shake the feeling that something bad was going to happen in the near future.

In the house, she went immediately to their bedroom and got ready to go to bed. Brian started to become worried because he had tried to make a move and she had turned him down-something she had never done. He sighed as he laid in bed with the TV on, waiting for Jayden to come out of the bathroom. When she had, she laid down with her back to Brian, nearly whispering her usual goodnight saying to him. Brian had laid down next to her, wrapping his arm around her body. “I sorry that tonight upset you,” he said before placing a kiss to the side of her neck.

“It's not your fault, baby. I'm not mad at you.”

“I know. Just get some rest. The next few days are just for you and I.”