Wasted

Autumn kept her eyes down the minute she heard a familiar voice in the coffee shop. She was too busy revising a short-story she was working on to even concentrate on the person but her mind still wandered.

"Autumn?" The voice was close and Autumn internally grimaced.

She looked up, feigning surprise. "Stacy, hey." She spoke up coolly.

Stacy smiled down at her and took the seat across from her at the small table. Autumn hoped she wouldn't spill coffee on all of her papers or else shit would hit the fan.

"I wasn't expecting to see you here." Stacy grinned and folded her arms across the table.

A lot of time had passed since Autumn had seen Stacy. She didn't know what Stacy had even thought happened the night at Frank's when her and Gerard got into it. For all she knew Stacy and Gerard were still a thing.

"Yeah, me either." Autumn muttered and looked down at her papers. She felt awkward and wanted Stacy to get up but she couldn't be rude.

An awkward silence came up apart from all the noise around them from the coffee table.

"Have you heard from the boys?" Stacy asked.

Autumn raised an eyebrow and nodded. "Yeah. They're in Spain right now."

It was a surprise to all of them that their manager was shelling out his life savings to keep the band going. It was an even bigger surprise that they had a giant fan base in Spain they didn't have a clue about.

"Wow, Spain?" Stacy's eyes widened and she let out a low chuckle. "That's really cool."

Autumn pursed her lips and nodded back. The only one she really kept up with was Frank. Phone calls were expensive so it was just a bunch of emails here and there.

"Autumn," Stacy murmured and her demeanour went from confident to sheepish. "I know Gerard likes you."

Autumn almost choked on her coffee. Cautiously she put her cup down and her eyebrows knitted together. "Sorry?"

"It was obvious really. I don't know why he kept bringing me along but even I knew he wasn't all that into me."

Autumn didn't know what to think of the brunette exposing her feelings to her in the open right now. Her mind was still spinning from the subject of Gerard having feelings for her.

"To be honest Gerard doesn't matter to me anymore," Autumn swallowed thickly as she realized the truth of it all. "Whatever you guys did is your business and I don't want to meddle in it. There was never anything between him and I."

Autumn abruptly stood up and gathered her things. "You can have him." Autumn shrugged and didn't bother to hear anything else Stacy had to say.

This time as she walked away there were no tears, there was no sting because she knew what she said was true. There was never anything between them and him being gone made it easier to come to terms with.

-

Shot after shot and Gerard was barely standing. His words had started to slur together like a string of another language and no one could really understand what he was saying.

The air around the band was tense and crushed. Just a few days ago they had heard the news of Gerard and Mikey's grandmother passing. Devastation hit them all but Gerard was taking it the worst.

Her funeral would be held tomorrow morning and they had cancelled a few shows to make time for it. Being back in town only hit Gerard harder with memories and the depression.

The bar he was in was dark and musky and filled up with people to the brim. All he cared about tonight was getting shit faced and no one could stop him.

He felt a hand on his shoulder slightly pushing away from the bar and he fiercely shrugged them off.

"Come on Gerard, its late." Mikey urged and grabbed his shoulder again.

Gerard turned to face his younger brother. "You can go h--home..." He slurred.

Mikey rolled his eyes and fiercely grabbed his brother and pulled him away from the bar. Gerard was so drunk he could barely stand so all of his body weight was on Mikey who was lanky and could barely hold his own.

"Let go!" Gerard shouted at him and tried to push him away but they got outside before Mikey finally let him drop to the floor.

"You've got to fucking grow up Gerard!" Mikey yelled and his face burned crimson. The bar was packed but the streets were dead silent and Mikey's voice echoed.

He was annoyed and out of patience with Gerard. All he'd been doing on tour before was drinking but now that their grandmother was gone he was getting out of control.

"Leave me alone!" Gerard yelled back and put his palms down on the cement to try to get up.

"You're acting like a teenager!"

Gerard stumbled on his feet and swayed around. "So fucking what," he slurred back and jabbed a finger at Mikey, "I'm living the life."

Gerard let out a small giggly and tumbled back down to the floor again.

"Grandma's death isn't an excuse to fuck up your life." Mikey snarled down at Gerard. How could his older brother, the one person he looked up to the most be so careless and pathetic?

"Fuck you Mikey!" Gerard yelled back and his messy hair fell in his face. He sat up on his knees.

"You're not the only one who lost her!" Mikey shouted and felt tears pricking at his eyes.

Gerard looked up and noticed the heartbreak in his brothers eyes. Up until now he hadn't noticed how hard Mikey was taking it. He was so concerned and wrapped up in his own self pity and depression he was ignoring his brother.

"Shit," he mumbled and looked down at the ground.

Mikey shook his head and looked away, wiping away some tears that fell with the sleeve of his jacket.

"I'm sorry Mikes," Gerard slurred and looked up at his brother with glassy eyes.

Mikey knew better than to have a serious conversation with Gerard when he was drunk. By the morning Gerard would have no memory of this so there was no point in staying mad.

Mikey sighed and nodded, kneeling down to help his brother up.

"Let's get home."