A False New Start

“Are you sure you’ll be all right?” Charlie asked for the millionth time. “You’re going to be far away from everyone.”

I felt bad for leaving him. Charlie had put up with so much from me over the past year, I don’t know how I would have survived without him. If it wasn’t for him forcing me to school and to eat every day during those first few months, I most likely would have just stayed in bed and stayed comatose. Sure, Jacob had been the one who had really helped me find myself but Charlie had kept me afloat in my sea of despair in the beginning. Now I was going to the other end of the country and I wouldn’t see him until Christmas because it was too expensive and pointless to make a plane trip for Thanksgiving or any time in between.

“Yeah, Dad,” I told him with a smile. “I’ll be fine, you know me, I can take care of myself.”

“I know,” he sighed. “I guess I just never thought I’d be dropping you off to go to school by plane.”

I had been thinking the same thing all summer as I made lists of what I would bring from home and what I would buy when I got to the campus. Because I was traveling by plane, I was limited with what I could bring. Most of the things I had brought with me were clothes, books, bed linens, and towels. I would buy toiletries, some food, and anything else I would need once I had all my things put away in the room. Charlie was going to hang around and bring me to the nearest Walmart or Target so we could get the shopping done then he was heading off to a hotel for the night and heading back to Forks tomorrow. I felt bad that he was spending so much money, I had offered to just go on the plane by myself, get a taxi at the airport, and move in by myself but he wouldn’t hear of it.

“This is an important time, Bells,” he’d said a few weeks ago when I first brought it up. “I want to be there when you go into your room for the first time and I want to see the campus.”

He had rented a car for the two days and at the moment we were stuck in a long line as we waited to get to my dorm hall, Hadley Hall. We had been in the same spot for at least ten minutes but at least I was getting a chance to look at the campus, something I had only seen online since coming out to visit hadn’t really been an option. The freshman orientation was held during the first few days after move in and I had been working extra time at the Newtons’ store to make extra money. Taking a trip to Vermont didn’t really seem important at the moment.

“Finally,” Charlie mumbled as the car in front of us began moving forward a few feet.

Because there was a little traffic jam, I was told to walk up to the dorms and sign in so that when we did get up to the building and had everything unloaded, I could go right up to my room with my things. That didn’t take long to do, it took maybe ten minutes to fill out the paperwork and get my key then I was back in the car with Charlie who had only moved up a few spaces.

After another fifteen minutes we were in front of Hadley. The directions we were given were to get everything out of the car and put it on the grass next to the building then have someone move the car so that it wouldn’t get in the way. I only had two suitcases and two carryon bags so it didn’t take long to unload the car. Charlie left to follow the flow of traffic and I waited for him next to my bags. I didn’t want to leave my things unattended and this gave me a chance to look around at my classmates. Seeing how much some people brought made me feel very unprepared. People were piling their items into rolling bins that were filled to the top and I even saw someone with two bins.

It was an overcast day and I just hoped that the rain would hold off until tonight so everyone could get moved in. Looking up at the cloudy sky, I sent out a prayer that this town had more sunlight than Forks, the last thing I needed was the threat of any vampires showing up. I was done with the supernatural with the exception of the Quileute wolf pack. Besides them, I didn’t want to have anything to do with any vampires, shape shifters, or any other mythical creature that lived in our world. I was busy glowering up at the clouds when Charlie came back over to me.

I was entering college in a new state, with a new attitude, and a new look. I had wanted to reinvent myself slightly. This was a new place and I was done with my plain style. Angela and I had gone to the salon in Portland a week before and gotten new hairstyles. I’d chopped off a few inches and gotten some layers added. It wasn’t much but I had gotten a few compliments about it and I was glad for the style that I chose myself. I was done being someone’s Barbie doll.

“How’re we doing this?” he asked, looking at my few bags. “We could get one of those bins.”

“I don’t think we need to do that. We can probably make it up in one trip, there are elevators so we don’t have to lug the suitcases up a flight of stairs.”

He nodded and grabbed one of the suitcases and a carryon and waited for me to do the same. We wove through the crowded sidewalk and got up the wheelchair ramp to the lobby. There was a short line for the elevators and it wasn’t long until we were on our way up to the second floor.

The door to room 238 was slightly ajar when we reached it, I guess I would get to meet my roommate in person sooner than I thought. Taking a deep breath, I pushed the door farther open and walked inside.

“Hi!” Catherine exclaimed from her spot next to her already covered bed. “I’m Catherine, you must be Bella! It’s so great to finally meet you. I hope you don’t mind that I took this side of the room, my mom wanted to be here to make sure all of the sheets and mattress cover fit so I had to pick fast.”

“It’s fine,” I told her and it really was. Both sides were identical, it really didn’t matter to me which side I slept on. “This is my dad Charlie.”

“Hi!” She was full of so much energy, I just hoped she would calm down once we got to know each other. Her exuberance reminded me of Alice. At least the two looked nothing alike. Catherine was maybe an inch or two taller than me with curly red hair and warm brown eyes. From what I’d learned about her through our emails over the summer, she was going to be an English major as well and she lived in New Hampshire so she didn’t have the long travel like I did. “Do you need help with your things?”

I shook my head and dropped the carryon I had on my bed. “Nope, this is it. We’re actually going to head out to the store and grab some stuff, this was everything I could bring on the plane. Do you want to come with us?” I asked at the last moment. If I was going to be living with this girl for the year, I should make some effort to spend time with her.

“Sure, if that’s all right?” she looked to Charlie for confirmation.

“It’s fine. It’ll be good for you two to get to know each other a little more. Bells, we don’t have to head out right away, why don’t you two take a little more time to unpack and figure out what you need then we can go.”

Catherine, who insisted I call her Catie, offered to help me unpack and she ended up setting up my books on my half of the bookshelf. Our room was a decent size with our two beds end to end with a ledge that ran along the wall next to them. Our dressers were four drawers that were cut in half so there were two stacks of two under our beds. We each had a closet that had a good amount of room plus a desk and two shelves above the desk. Catie had brought a microfridge unit and I offered to get the TV when we went out even though I didn’t watch much TV, it just seemed like the nice thing to do.

It didn’t take long to get all of my clothes organized in the closet and drawers. The rest of the things I had didn’t need to be dealt with right away, it was mostly some toiletries that needed to be used up from home, some things to make the room feel more homey like pictures and some wall decorations Renee had found and shipped to me with a note saying I definitely needed them, and the few school supplies I had left over from high school. I left those things in one of the bags and put it on the bed next to my sheets and everything, I would make my bed after Charlie left.

“Do we need anything for the room?” Catie asked once I finished up with everything. “I know we have the little mirror on the door but I was thinking maybe I’ll get a full length mirror and I can keep that on my closet door.”

“I can’t really think of anything,” I said while writing down the things I would need. High on the list were a dry erase calendar, snack foods and Easy Mac, and a lamp. Catie helped me finish up my list by going through her things, she had a lot of stuff, and working from there. By the time we were finished and ready to head out, I had a nice long list, I was once again reminded of Alice. I was angry with myself for thinking about her so much on what was supposed to be a good day. I did miss Alice, I missed her like crazy, but she had hurt me just as much as he had by leaving and never coming back. If she really had loved me like a sister, Alice would have ignored him and come to see me at least once. It had been almost a year and I hadn’t seen or heard a word from any of them. It made me angry and sad at the same time, something I didn’t want to deal with on the first day of college.

“Okay, let’s go, I think I have everything I need,” I brightly said, pushing away all negative thoughts.

It was much easier to get out of the parking garage and away from the school than it had been to get to the dorms. Catie had stayed at the school for a weekend during the school year to get a feel for the campus and the girl she had been staying with had taken her around town so she knew the way to Walmart. Apparently we weren’t the only students who needed to get extra stuff. Throughout the store we saw a couple people sporting Middlebury t-shirts and students were getting each other’s opinions on what to get for their room.

Shopping with Catie was…fun surprisingly. It was nothing against her, I just didn’t think we would hit it off so easily. However, after spending an hour shopping with her, I thought we could become good friends. She was a jokester and kept me laughing throughout the trip. I was actually looking forward to when Charlie left and we could have some time to ourselves to get to know each other more. We had covered the basics through our emails but it would be better to actually sit down face to face and talk.

“Do you have enough stuff, Bells?” Charlie asked when we were loading the shopping cart’s contents into the car.

I had to admit, I did have a lot more stuff now. I may have gone overboard with the food but I was more than willing to share it with Catie and I had doubled up on any bathroom items I got so that I wouldn’t have to go to the store too often. I was pleased with my purchases, though. I figured I would be good for a little while at least.

“I think I should head out,” Charlie announced after we had brought everything back to the room. Catie and I were chattering about what orientation events we were going to participate in over the next few days. “Do you want to walk me out?”

“Yeah, of course.”

We rode the elevator in silence and still didn’t say anything as we left the building. I was curious about what Charlie was getting ready to say because I could see the wheels turning in his mind. I didn’t have to wait long, once we were halfway to the parking garage he stopped.

“I’ll let you go here, there’s no point in you walking all the way there and back.”

“Okay, are you coming to say bye tomorrow?”

“No,” he looked a little upset as he said that. “My plane leaves at seven and I have to get the car back.”

“Oh.”

We stood there awkwardly. Neither of us were ones for heartfelt moments so we weren’t really sure what to say.

Charlie let out deep breath. “Well, have a good time, Bells. I know you’ll do great here.”’

“Thanks, Dad.”

“And…just be safe. Make good choices with everything. I know you’re a good kid and you want to do well in school but college is a lot different than high school. I want you to have fun and enjoy this time but be careful. Even in a school this small, things can still get out of control.”

“Don’t worry, Dad,” I sighed, grateful that at least it was Charlie who was giving me this talk and not Renee, she would have made it ten times more embarrassing and added some tears into the mixture. “Parties and all that aren’t for me.”

“I know. This is hard, I want you to have a good time here and make friends but I don’t want you to do anything dangerous at the same time.”

I gave him a quick hug. “I’ll be good, Dad. I’ll call you every day and give you an update.”

“You don’t have to do that,” he mumbled, somewhat embarrassed. “I’m sure you’ll be out with your friends every night, studying and enjoying the school. Just call me at least once a week and make sure to call Renee too, she’s the one you really have to worry about.”

“Believe me, I know. Call me when you get home tomorrow so I know the trip was fine.” I leaned in and gave him a longer hug and a peck on the cheek. “Love you, Dad, thanks for everything.”

His cheeks flushed a little. “Love you too, Bella. Take care.”

And then he was gone and I was left in a new state in a new part of the country once more. At least this time I wasn’t a novelty, all of the freshmen were new here and there were a lot of us. Plus I had a potential friend right off the bat, I wouldn’t have to go through the awkwardness that moving to Forks had entailed. I felt that this move would be so much better than my last one and hopefully it would be less painful.