Transparent

As a teenager, I should’ve had more priorities, more things I was looking forward to, but I didn’t. The only thing I really wanted it life was to come home to my room, plop down and see Oz. No matter how tiresome I may be to him, he always seemed to manage to sit on my bed, looking curiously at whatever I’m doing. But as soon I as turn my gaze to him, he turns his face into a stony glare.

I chuckled at his sour face before turning back to my small amount of homework. I can no longer feel a glare on my back. He thinks he’s so smooth.

He’s always silent as I write down my answers as if he’s soaking in everything about my handwriting, about my posture and the way I’m holding my pencil. While he’s enthralled, I looked at him in my peripheral vision. He looked boyish and innocent, like a cat. I grinned before continuing to finish up the worksheet.

I wondered what it must be like to harbor all of that loneliness and hatred. I just wanted Oz to be happy for once, to show a smile as innocent at his curiosity was.

“Were you happy with your past life?” I asked quietly, trying not to set him off. I didn’t want him to go storming off and most of all, I wanted him to answer the question.

“Yes, I was very happy. A different woman every night, a huge house, and money,” He said, unable to keep the snap out of his voice. I couldn’t tell if he actually hadn’t been happy with it when he was alive or if he simply didn’t want to be reminded that he was a ghost.

I could see him sinking through the mattress, determined to escape from where I was. “Please don’t leave,” I begged, whimpering pathetically. I didn’t know where the whimper came from, but it made him pause.

“Why not?” He questioned, his colorless eyes burning into me.

My heart thumped painfully in my chest for a moment before I made something up. “My dad says you should never walk away from something angry.”

He narrowed his gaze at me, scrutinizing me. “I am not angry.” He said, trying to even his voice out so that he wouldn’t sound bitter. He failed miserably.

“Please, Oz.”

I could see him clench his teeth before sighing and pulling the rest of his transparent body out of the object I was sitting on.

“Would you be honest with me about just this one thing?” I asked.

“I wish not to talk about it,” he told me with an honesty I could respect.

I let a smile crawl across my lips before saying, “Okay.”

“Okay?” He repeated. “You are just going to leave it like that? No pursuing questions or prying?”

“Oz…” I murmured. “If you don’t want to talk about it… we don’t have to talk about it.”

He was quiet after that. It took me a small while to get back on track of whatever I was doing. What I ended up doing was sitting in front of my TV and watching a show for a small amount of time before I fell asleep on my side, unable to keep my eyes open any longer.

When they finally did open again, they met a very familiar gaze. Oz was only a few inches from my face and the sudden appearance made me jolt forward, straight through him. My skin tingled lightly as if being tickled by bubbles from a carbonated soda as I passed through the ghost.

“Were you there the entire time?” My heart was hammering around in my chest almost painfully.

“I was not exactly... forthcoming when you asked that question earlier,” he started, completely ignoring my new question.

But I no longer cared about the question either. He had a strange expression that I could hardly see as he dared not meet my eyes.

“I enjoyed my life. But… I was not a good man. I still am not,” he said, completely exposed. He was letting me in on something about his life. He said it with so much shame, that it had to be the truth.

“Why did you decide to tell me?” I asked, tilting my head slightly at him.

“You have this nasty habit of guilting people into things,” he admitted, standing up.

My mouth hung open in shock. “I do not!”

“Rather shameless, I’d say,” he chuckled before floating gently upwards. He rolled over in the air to face me.

It was at that point that I realized he was just joking about me guilt tripping him. But the delightful speculation that he might just be starting to feel comfortable around me was a groundbreaking experience.