Coffee Break

“I swear, if my son doesn’t wake up soon, I’ll…”

“Dad, calm down, the doctors and nurses are doing everything they can,”

“Everything they can?! Then why the fuck is he still unconscious?!”

“Sir, I’m going to have to ask you to calm down,”

“I will calm down when you get my son to wake up, you piece of shit medical nobody,”

“Yeah, because insulting everyone’s really going to help,”

“Shut the hell up, Sam,”

“D-Dad?” I rasped.

I slowly blinked my eyes open, just in time to see my dad and my brother rush to my side, each taking a hand.

“Oh fuck, oh fuck I thought you’d never wake up!” my dad whimpered.

“I told you that I never wanted to see you so broken in a hospital bed again, Zack, damn it!” Sam choked.

“Why am I not dead?” I asked softly.

My dad choked a sob, and my brother’s eyes filled with tears. The nurse they’d been arguing with smiled sadly at me before leaving the room.

“All we know is that your three friends John, Rian and Paul heard you screaming and yelling from the parking lot after work. They found you lying in a pool of your own blood and Martin heavily beaten up and unconscious too. They called the ambulances and then called us,”

“M-Martin? Oh my God, Martin! Is he okay? Where is he?” I demanded, trying to sit up.

“Woah, stay still, this is the second serious head injury you’ve had,” Sam said firmly, pushing me to lie back down.

“Where is Martin? Please don’t say he’s…”

“Martin’s in a coma. He has even less chance of waking up than you did,” my dad murmured.

I couldn’t’ve stopped the tears that ran down my face even if I’d wanted to.

“No, no he can’t be! He has to be okay! I can’t lose him too!” I said angrily.

“Zack, calm down, it’ll be okay,” Sam said desperately, him and dad pinning me to the bed.

“No! It won’t be okay! He’s in here because of me and he could die because of me! Those guys have been targeting me the whole time, not him! I should be in the coma! I should be dead, not him!” I yelled, struggling in their grip.

My dad and brother both started crying too, but before they could say anything, the door opened and two male nurses walked in, followed by a female nurse.

“Excuse me gentlemen, we’re going to have to sedate Zachary,” the woman announced.

“What? Why?!” my dad spluttered.

“In case he does any damage to himself, or you two,” she replied simply.

“No! I have to see Martin! I have to!” I begged.

No-one said anything as the female nurse pulled out a large needle, the two male nurses taking over from my dad and brother in pinning me down.

“No! Martin!” I cried out.

A sharp pain in my thigh. And blackness again.

*

A few days later and I was still in the hospital, this time moved to a larger ward for observation. I haven’t heard anything about Martin’s state, but I have had a lot of visitors. Alex was in hysterics when he came in with Rian, but he insisted he didn’t blame me. I don’t know why he bothered to lie. Everyone knows it was my fault.

I was still awake in the middle of the night when the night nurse came round for her shift. I haven’t been able to sleep tonight – there’s been a lot of movement outside the doors and a lot of talking. If no-one’s going to let me see Martin, they could at least shut the hell up. I stayed as still as possible when the nurse came to my bedside, but couldn’t help frowning when I felt something pressed into my hand, and a squeeze on my shoulder. What the fuck?!

As soon as the nurse left the room, I forced myself to sit upright, using the bad lighting from the corridor to see what was in my hand. It was a slip of paper, with writing on.

Room 246. He woke up three hours ago. Your name was the first thing he said. Wait until 2am to go and see him. X

Oh my God. Oh my fucking God! Martin’s awake?! Oh thank that nurse for her kindness.

I glanced at my watch sitting on the tiny little bedside table. 1am. Fuck, I still have an hour. I can wait an hour, right? I’ve been waiting three days, I can wait another hour.

Right?

~

It’s a lot harder to sneak up a flight of stairs whilst wheeling an IV drip around, but thankfully I haven’t lost any motion in my hands because of my head injury this time, and I was able to carry most the way.

Room 243…

Room 244…

Room 245…

Room 246!

I took a deep breath before slowly opening the door and stepping inside the room, waiting until the door was closed to look around the room. It’s a private room, with only one bed…with Martin sitting upright in it, smiling weakly at me.

“She told me you’d come at 2am. The nurse,” he rasped.

Tears filled my eyes and I stumbled to his side, not sure of what to say. What can I say? I’m the reason he’s here, in this state. How can I get over that?

“I thought I’d lost you,” I finally mumbled.

“Baby, you could never lose me,” Martin said, smiling a little more.

“But…”

I trailed off.

“But what?” Martin asked, frowning.

I swallowed heavily. I need to say this now or I never will.

“I-I understand if you want to leave me,” I managed to whisper.

“Excuse me?” Martin said, confused.

“It’s okay, I know and accept that you have every reason to blame me for you ending up here, beaten half to death and put in a coma,” I said.

“Why the fuck would I ever leave the man I love?” Martin replied.

I swallowed heavily, not understanding.

“You don’t hate me?” I asked quietly.

“Why would I?” Martin frowned.

My hands started shaking slightly, so I gripped the rails on the edge of his bed.

“B-Because I’m the reason you’re in here! I’m the reason you’re like this!” I choked.

Martin smiled sadly, and shook his head.

“I would happily be in this much agony in hospital every day if it means you aren’t,” he said softly.

I whimpered and threw my arms around him without being able to stop myself, letting my tears flow into the crook of his neck as I sobbed. Martin shakily hugged me back, whispering comforting words and nonsense, until I had stopped crying enough to lift my head.

“I just…I don’t understand,” I mumbled.

“Just because your last boyfriend happened to get put in hospital and blamed you, doesn’t mean I will. Hell, if anything you should blame me – I couldn’t protect you from those guys. I watched a pool of blood form around your head after that guy slammed you into my car – it’s me that should be worried about you leaving me,”

“Never,” I said firmly.

Martin just smiled.

“Then we know where this is going. I’m not leaving you and you’re not leaving me. I still love you as much as I did before and I’m hoping you still love me as much too. We’re going to leave this hospital and have a copious amount of hot, incredibly gay sex, and in a few years we’re going to move in together and a few years after that we’re going to get married,” Martin said simply.

I found myself blushing. “You’ve planned it all out, huh?”

“I had to do something while I was waiting for you to come up here tonight,” Martin chuckled.

Tears filled my eyes again, but before I could say anything, there was a soft knock at the door. Ah, shit, that’s my cue to leave.

“I love you, okay? Don’t ever forget that,” Martin said firmly.

“I won’t, I promise. And I love you too. I’ll come up to see you tomorrow?” I asked hopefully.

“I’ll be waiting,” Martin smiled.