When Tragedy Strikes

Carter sat with his legs up on the dashboard and a lazy smile on his face as his friend talked about something random, Carter wouldn't know, his thoughts were with Fiona, focused on the fact that today was the day she was coming home from holiday, today he would get to see her again, he no longer cared what her father thought, he would take her away from the abusive asshole and have her live with him. It was intense, the tightening in his chest as his arm hung out the window of the jeep wrangler. A rough smack to the chest broke Carter out of his thoughts and he turned to grin lazily at his best friend, “I get that your fucking excited, man, but seriously, can you listen for like ten minutes?” Ian asked with a chuckle.

Carter snorted unceremoniously “I can try, but I can't make any promises, she's all I think about, I know we're only seventeen, but I'm going to marry that girl.” It was Ian's turn to snort as he pulled into the driveway of his house, “seriously man, she's it for me, I don't need nor do I want anyone else, no one could take her place, no one could even come close,” Ian just nodded understandingly as the two of them climbed out of the car and onto the concrete before glancing up at the two story house.

Shoving open the door to the house, Ian yelled to his Dad that he was home before turning to Carter, “what time does she get home today anyway?” Glancing at his watch Carter replied half three before groaning loudly. It was only twelve, that's three and a half hours to kill before he gets to see the girl of his desires, the person he loves more than he loves himself. Ian nods along before leading Carter into the kitchen and grabbing two bottles of water, throwing one to Carter before they headed for the outside patio. “So am I dropping you off at her house at four? Give her a chance to unpack?”

“If you don't mind, man, I can always call the 'rents and get them to pick me up, I'm sure they won't mind too much,” Ian just nodded his head before twisting open the bottle and taking a sip. “You won't know love until you feel like this Ian, she's everything to me, seriously man, I would be the same drug addicted idiot I was if it wasn't for her, I literally owe her my life even though she's given me hers.”

Raising his eyebrow, Ian just laughed loudly before sinking onto one of the deck chairs “man, you sound whipped,” Carter just sunk onto another deck chair and grinned at his friend before nodding in agreement. “One day, I'll be as happy as you are.”

“I hope so, you won't know happiness until you fall in love, just don't wait until it's too late, I know you like that girl, Claire, ask her out.” Ian just shook his head before glancing around the yard, it was obvious no one had cut the lawns in a while, knowing Ian's mum she was too busy with the yard worker for him to get around too it, Ian doesn't care, neither does his Dad because it keeps her from getting on their case all the time, not to mention Ian's parent's haven't been sleeping in the same room since he was three, they barely even talk.

Glancing around, Ian let out a sigh, “we have no lives, we're sitting around a pool drinking water and waiting for your girlfriend to get home,” he paused to check the time “which is another three hours away,” Ian proceeded to lean back in his seat and stretch his back. A groan passed through his chapped lips before muttering “maybe time would pass faster if we actually went and did something.”

Carter rolled his eyes before getting to his feet “if you're so bored, why don't you just go do something, your house is massive and there is always something to do,” Carter grumbled emphasizing on the always before grinning at his best friend.

Ian placed a movie in the disc tray before grabbing the remote and sitting on the couch, Carter was in the kitchen grabbing a bowl of cheese doritos, a packet of gummy worms and two bottles of pepsi before making his way into the living room and dropping onto the couch beside Ian and handing him a bottle. The movie they decided to watch was 'Real Steel' a movie that was let out the day before and it was the first time of them watching it.

Half way through the movie, clicking heels sounded throughout the living room before Ian's younger sister, Madison appeared in the doorway. Her bleached blonde hair was up in a side pony tail while she was wearing a baby pink halter top and a denim mini skirt that barely covered her ass. Madison sent Carter a flirty smile to which he rolled his eyes, before she glared at her brother and left the room.

As soon as Madison was out of the room Carter glanced at his watch and groaned, it had only been an hour since the movie was put on and he was dying to see Fiona, every time he though about her he would get butterflies in his stomach and a cheesy grin on his face.

Ian just smiled to himself, happy that his friend finally found someone worth his time. The two of them finished the movie, having half a bowl of chips and the lollie still unopened on the table. Ian picked up the bowl and packet before disappearing into the kitchen and returning empty handed. “We should head back into town about now, it'll take around half an hour and we can kill some time there.”

Carter just nodded before checking his phone and feeling a small twitch in his stomach. He hasn't heard from Fiona in three days, since she left on holiday and he was getting worried, he just assumed she forgot her charger, which he didn't mind, he would be seeing her today anyway.

Madison was standing in the doorway talking to her father when Carter and Ian stepped into the foyer. Ian's dad shot them a grin before turning to Madison and handing her five hundred dollars cash before muttering something about her outfit, rolling his eyes and disappearing back up the staircase, probably to his office. Ian just shook his head before they both headed out the car, Ian unlocking the doors before they both slid into their seats and Ian started the engine.

The ride into town was seemingly brief, Ian chattering away about nothing in particular while Carter just stared at the passing scenery and checked his phone every so often for the time. He was excited, that much was obvious to Ian who was just glad to his friend in such a good mood.

They ended up at a small cafe on the border of town, Ian pulled into the parking lot and turned off the car before they both climbed out and Ian locked the car. The small cafe was moderately modern with eggshell coloured walls and black tiles, there were several booths set into the walls with a couple of table in the center of the room and a breakfast bar along the counter. Ian and Carter both sat at the bar and flagged down the waitress who handed them a menu before grabbing her notepad. Carter ordered the cheese burger with curly fries while Ian got a piece of mince pie and both got a glass of coke.

By the time their meal was over, it was time to head to Fiona's house. They both packed themselves in the car, with a satisfied groan before Ian started the car and pulled out of the parking lot heading towards the other side of town. They got to Fiona's house at quarter to four and Carter was buzzing with excitement, Fiona's family car was parked in the driveway with the bags still packed in the back of it.

The golden retriever dog was lying lazily under a tree, attempting to hide from the mid-summer sun while the cat was stretched out across the face, its tail occasionally flicking around. Ian put the car in park and turned off the engine before Carter climbed out. “Wait for me here?” Carter asked hopefully to which he got a nod in reply. Carter took off towards the house, his thumbs hanging lazily in his jean pockets as he walked up the three front steps and knocked on the front door.

The wait was almost agonizing as he stood their, all he wanted was to see Fiona's face, her happy smile and dancing eyes.

A tired Melissa answered the door with a screaming baby held tightly in her arms, he eyes flickered with recognition at the boy standing in her doorway and a small breathy sob escaped her lips before she turned, motioning slightly for him to come in. Carter just glanced at Ian and held up his hand. A bad feelin was settling itself in his gut and he wasn't sure he wanted to know why.

Carter followed Melissa into the living room where it seemed a small party was occuring, Fiona wasn't in her circle of relatives, Carter noted and he wondered where she was. Melissa set Benjamin in his playpen where he continued to scream, Carter remembered that only Fiona could calm him down when he was like this. Finally glanced at the separate family members faces Carter took in expressions of sadness and despair and that feeling grew.

Melissa placed what she hoped was a comforting hand on Carter's shoulder before leading him to the empty chair where he presumed she was once sitting. Glancing around, Carter also noted that James was nowhere to be seen.

“Melissa, I only came to see Fiona, can you please get her for me so we can be on our way?” I smiled politely while Melissa let out a broken sob as soon as she heard Fiona. I could see in her eyes, the internal battle she was fighting before she glanced at the rest of the family hopelessly, asking for help. One of Fiona's aunts stood up and made her way over before kneeling beside Carter's chair.

Carter just looked around at everyone strangely, he still couldn't figure out why everyone looked so upset, and why no one would get him his girlfriend. Well, it's not that he couldn't figure it out, he just didn't want too, because he could tell it wasn't good.

“Carter, honey,” Fiona's aunt began a sad smile on her lips. “We cannot get you Fiona, I wish,” she paused to to swallow and breathe deeply, “I wish we could, I really, really do,” her eyes had already begun to water as she grabbed Carter's hand tightly a single tear rolling down her cheek while her free hand moved to wipe it away. “There is nothing I wish for more right now, than to walk down the hallway and get you Fi...” She paused, choking on Fiona's name before allowing a sob to escape before she choked out “Fiona, but it just, it isn't possible,” Carter looked at Fiona's aunt with a strange expression. His mind was still failing to comprehend the words and he tried to stand only to be held back by Melissa's hand.

Grace stood up with a breathless sob before sitting next to her husband and burying her face in his shoulder. Melissa took her place, kneeling in front of Carter with a solemn expression “Carter, dear, I wish I didn't have to tell you this, I honestly wish it didn't have to be this way,” Melissa choked on a sob, she could tell her attempts at with-holding the information were running out but she didn't want to admit it yet. “I wish that this was good news, that Fiona was just in town getting milk but Carter, Fiona isn't coming back this time, she's passed on,” still Carter couldn't comprehend what was happening, his eyebrows scrunching in thought.

“What do you mean?” His voice was sore, his voice cracked on the last word as he looked down at Melissa who now had tears pouring down her cheeks.

“Carter, I'm so, so s-s-sorry,” she stuttered over the last word before sobbing loudly and breaking out in tears. “Fiona can't see you because she, well she, she, s-s-she is...” Melissa trailed off, swallowing the last word as she collapsed into a sitting position on the floor and burried her face in her hands.

“You can't see my daughter,” James announced walking into the room from his “because Fiona is dead.”

With that one word, Carter's whole mind shut down, the only thing he could hear was the resounding word 'dead' pounding in his head. He still refused to admit to himself that the words spoken were true, he still refused to admit to himself that Fiona is gone, even though he heard the words, he refused to believe they were true. Finally gaining control over his body, he shot out of the seat, glaring at James.

“You're lying!” He announced pointing at James, fury in his eyes. “You always hated the idea of us being together, and you were always trying to keep us apart, but this is too far, she's not dead, she can't be, I saw her four days ago, I was with her at the beach, she's not dead.” Carter was angry, no, he was furious at James, how could he lie, how could they all lie to him. Melissa looked up, heartbroken, her eyes were rimmed red but Carter refused to look at her.

Pushing past James and into the hallways, Carter shoved into Fiona's room expecting to see her sitting on her bed, or at her computer, her face turning to smile at him, but the room was empty of Fiona. It held her smell, it held her personality captured in the photographs all over the room, it held memories of the two of them, the only thing it was void of was her physical present.

Carter felt something in him break, he's not sure what it was but all of a sudden he was watching himself, like an out of body experience, he was watching himself run around the house searching each room, tearing beds away from walls in his desperate attempt to find Fiona, alive and well, but he came up empty, Fiona wasn't in the house, he didn't know where she was, he was adamant that they had to be lying to him. Finally making it back to the living room, Carter leaned against the wall and looked at them all. “Where is she?”

Melissa finally rose from the ground and cautiously made her way towards him, grabbing a letter off the table by the couch. “Carter, we're not lying, this isn't some scheme to keep you apart,” Melissa paused and held out the letter, tears still running down her blotchy cheeks “Fiona is dead, I wish it wasn't so, but she is.” Carter grabbed the letter and glanced at the front, his name was written in her writing.

Gulping deeply, Carter glanced at Melissa who motioned to the still unopened letter.

Opening the letter, Carter glanced around the room once more, a sad expression was on almost everyone's faces, only James looked depressed, haggard, like he had aged thirty years in the space of four. Glancing at the writing, Carter took a deep breath before reading.

Carter.
My Love.

I want to say first, I am so incredibly sorry it had to be this way, I didn't want it to end this way, truly. If there was one thing I was sure of in my life, it was my love for you, there was nothing more pure in my life, you were all I wanted, all I needed and that never did and never will change. I am sorry I didn't give you warning, that I didn't allow you insight into my plans, because, it wasn't planned, not in the slightest. I would never intentionally do something to hurt you, but like you once told me, 'it's cruel to stop someone from suicide, because it has to be so much more painful for them to be alive then it would be for them to be dead' and I know it's selfish, and I know it will hurt you and I hate that fact, I hate it more than I hate myself.

Carter stopped reading, glancing up with tears finally gathering in his eyes. Melissa was still standing infront of him, her arms wrapped around herself in an attempt to comfort herself. Looking back at the note Carter continued to read...

I know, you're going to be upset, and I know you're going to blame yourself, but it is not your fault, it will never be your fault, you cannot have seen something coming if it was not planned, and I wish, with all of my heart that you do not dwell on me, I want you to do your best to let me go and move on, because you cannot waste precious time trying to hold on to someone who has never really been alive, unless I was with you, but we both know that my father would have done anything to keep us apart. Everytime I saw my family, the way they acted in public, I felt disgusted that people believed the facade, I don't know why I'm writing this, you already know. You know everything about me, my favourite colour, my favourite song and band. You were it for me, you were the guy I was going to marry, I was sure of it, I mean I know I already said my Dad would try to keep us apart, but I would have found you again. I know you won't hate me for this, you won't even be mad with me, you'll try to understand, but I know you won't be able too, you'll feel like you weren't good enough, but you were, you so were. It wasn't you, my decision, although it contained you, was not made because of you, it was made because you were the only thing that was keeping me alive, it was you against everything else and unfortunately, everything else won. I want you to be happy, I want you to be you, I don't want you to be the person your parents want you to be, I want you to be the guy you were around me, the one who could look at me and take my breath away. I know it will be hard, but I want you to be at my funeral and I want you to make them play our song, I want you to be the person who talks about my life, and about me, because you're the only one who truly knew me. It's so hard writing this note, because I don't want it to come true, I don't really want my plans to work, because the last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt you, but if you are reading this I did go through with it. Lastly, I want you to know that I'm sorry, that I love you and that I want your real life to begin now that I can't hold you back.

I'm sorry.
I love you.
Fiona.

Tear marks smudged the ink, dry marks from where Fiona had cried while writing it and when a fresh tear fell on the page, Carter realized he was crying too, a flood of tears were creeping down his face as he folded the note and put it back in the envelope, folding it and putting it in his back pocket. Choking out the words he looked at Melissa and asked “when is the funeral?”

She took a deep breath to steady her words “in two days, it will be held at Saint Andrew's church and she will be buried in the graveyard outside, we were wondering,” she paused to glance at James who just inclined his head slightly “we were wondering if you would help carry her coffin?” Carter just nodded in response before glancing around the room at all the sad and teary faces. Before heading towards the door, ignoring Melissa who asked him to stay for awhile.

Pausing at the door and glancing back at everyone he mumbled “I'm sorry, for throwing at fit,” and he walked out the door, closing it behind him.

It wasn't until he was half way back to the car that the reality set in. Carter gasped loudly, a pain shattering through his chest before he collapsed on the ground, his hand grasping at his chest in an attempt to ease the pain. Ian watched stunned for a moment before shoving open his door and climbing out of the cab of his car. “Carter? Carter!” He ran the other half of the way to his friend.

Carter looked up at Ian, his eyes filled with unshed tears “She, she,” he couldn't get out another word before a loud, choked sob broke out. Ian wrapped an arm around Carter's shoulders and helped him to his feet. Having the weight leaned on his shoulder, Ian huffed before leading Carter to his car. Helping Carter into his seat, Ian closed the door and ran around, climbing into the drivers seat and starting the car. He didn't take Carter home, he headed back towards his house, knowing that Carter wouldn't want to be home.

Pulling into his driveway, Madison ran out, her skirt flicking with the movements. She was smiling in a seductive fashion until she saw Carter sitting upright with tear tracks on his cheeks. Her facade dropped and she watched as Ian helped his friend out of the car and into the house. Ian laid Carter on the couch before heading into the kitchen. Madison sat cross-legged and placed Carter's head in her lap, stroking his hair in a calming fashion. Carter just curled into a ball, his eyes staring off into space while his mind refused to focus on one thing. Tears continued to pour out of his eyes in a never ending fashion as he slowly rocked back and forth hiccuping every-so-often.

Eventually, Madison heard him start muttering Fiona over and over in a broken, monotonous voice.