I See You

After a long and uneasy train journey spent alternating between trying (and failing) to read my novel and mulling over what to say to Malfoy, I came to the reluctant conclusion that I was going to have to tell him what I saw, to warn him. He was never going to believe me (they never did), but I had to try. If there was one thing I’d learnt, it was that predicting the future was not an exact art. Sometimes it came true, sometimes not.

Curiously and reassuringly, it was mostly not around him.

When we pulled up to the station, I dug out my shiny new Head Girl badge and pinned it to my robes, resigned to the fact that I was probably going to be paired with somebody I didn’t like. I stepped out into the cold night air and decided I’d tell Malfoy what I'd seen after I’d helped the 1st Years to the boat with Hagrid.

I left my trunk and my cat’s empty basket (he’d jumped off the train when the doors opened), underneath a little overhang a little ways down the platform, knowing it would be taken up to my dorm for me by the House Elves. That done, I began ushering 1st years on their way.

As it almost always did, it began to rain about ten minutes later, and it was followed by the predictable mayhem, mostly from the fashion-conscious girls pushing to get out of the downpour.

As I sloshed my way over to Hagrid, I realized I was being accompanied.

“What are you -?” I started, but then my eyes flickered down to see Malfoy’s Head Boy badge winking in the rain, the bright gold letters 'HB' mocking me. Fabulous. “Should’ve known it would be you,” I muttered. He flashed me his roguish grin, uncomfortably in tune with my thoughts. I glanced at him again, and then did a double-take. Through the darkness, I could see rivulets of rain catching and glistening in his eyelashes, dripping off his chin. I forced myself to look away. It was a good look for him. I probably looked like a half-drowned cat.

“I’m sorry.”

“Tell me what you’re sorry for later, yeah?” He rolled his eyes at my tone.

When we’d finished rounding up the 1st years and wayward Slytherin 2nd years, it was practically just us and a couple prefects, Gryffindors I think. They took the first coach that came, leaving us standing alone on the Platform, shivering and wet.

“So what’re you sorry for, again? Existing?” I asked snidely; the effect was ruined by my chattering teeth. He gave me a sidelong glance and ignored my question, holding out his arm to me.

“Come here. You’re freezing.” Of course, he didn’t seem affected by the cold. I rolled my eyes, but otherwise ignored him. “You’ll catch cold like that.” He stated calmly, and he was probably right. Looking at him, it was a tempting offer, more tempting than I’d care to admit to myself.

“You have no shame.” He grinned, his teeth flashing in the darkness.

“I’m sorry about earlier. If I’d known you’d be so overwhelmed by my touch -” He was baiting me, I knew.

“You know it’s not about that.” He sighed and muttered something I thought sounded a bit like 'Yeah, I wish'. Couldn't be sure though, what with the howling wind whipping my hair about my ears.

“So you saw something? Like last time? It was about me, wasn’t it?” He knew he was right. But the last two times, what I’d Seen hadn’t come true. I found myself fiercely hoping this would be the same. “See, last time, I knew it was about me because you were moan–”

“ALRIGHT, alright. It was about you. But it wasn’t nice, Malfoy. I think. . . I think I saw you die.”

Silence, penetrated only by the weather and the sound of wheels on cobblestone as the carriage rolled up. I didn’t look at his face as we got inside, biting my lip the whole time. Five whole minutes later, I gave in and glanced his way. He was watching me.

“You’re not lying.” He finally stated; I shook my head. “Well, shit.” He went back to looking out the window. I knew I had to do something – even though I hated his guts, I wasn’t so heartless that I wished him dead.

For the first time ever, I voluntarily reached out and took his large, broomstick-calloused hand in mine, staring across the dark carriage at him until he slowly turned his head to look at me. I knew I wouldn't have another vision now after having had one so recently.

What I saw there wasn’t what I’d expected. Usually when I tell somebody something like that, they laugh at me, or if they believe me, they usually get mad. Don't ask me why. He did neither, just sat there regarding me calmly.

“Um, I think it’s going to happen if I stay on the same. . . Path. Like, if nothing changes I think it might happen. Or maybe if something does change. Nothing I’ve ever Seen about you has.” He suddenly laughed, but the sound was all wrong.

“Yeah. I know.” My face flamed in the darkness; he hadn’t exaggerated earlier about the last time he’d touched me. It had been a few months ago, when he’d caught me unawares in the Slytherin common room. Thank God we'd been alone. As it was, he’d teased me about it till the holidays. I shoved his hand away with a put-upon sigh.

“Why do you care about that so much?” I finally asked, genuinely curious. I’d never asked him straight-out like that, because I didn’t want to hear it, but I wanted to know now.

“Why do I care?” He looked up in disbelief, my vision completely forgotten now. His eyes flashed in the darkness, and his face went hard. My mind flashed on the last time he'd really lost his temper with me back in third year and it suddenly hit me that if he got that angry again there wasn’t much I could do about it, what with my wand stowed away in my trunk. “Oh, your ‘Inner Eye’ is fine, but what about these?” He waved his finger in front of my eyes, his movement too fast.

“Come on, Malfoy. What’s your angle? You could have practically any girl you wanted. Why do you keep harassing me? Honestly?”

“Honestly? You’re a clever girl, Mona. Figure it out.” He snapped. He hadn't been so rude to me in a long time. I found I didn’t like it.

“Fuck you.”

“You would.” He replied in exactly the same childish tone I knew I’d used. I glared.

“In your dreams, Malfoy.”

“You bet. See you tonight, baby,” He said it just to make me cringe, and I did. My face flushed hot, and I was glad of the concealing darkness. It led to things I did not want to think about. Especially with him sat so close across from me that our knees were almost brushing.

I didn’t have a comeback for that one, and he knew it. We stewed in angry silence until the carriage stopped. I squelched inside without a backward glance.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As I stabbed my potatoes with more anger than hunger, I realized that it was probably the most civil we'd ever been to each other, which obviously wasn't saying much at all. In fact, it made very little sense why he understood me as well as he did, or why he wouldn’t leave me alone. I never really gave him the chance to finish a sentence, usually.

I glanced all the way down the table to where he was sitting and saw him ranting about something to some of his friends, which were looking my way. I flinched; I could guess the topic by the evils the girls threw my way. I sighed. Thanks Malfoy. That’s all I need – more girls hating me.

I was almost through my pudding when a thought occurred to me and I groaned aloud to myself, drawing odd looks from the people sitting around me.

Corridor patrol.