Status: updates when inspiration and free time collide.

The Quiet of Compazine

Sheep to the Slaughter.

I wasn’t expecting a call at four in the morning, and I certainly wasn’t expecting it to be from John. “Hello?” I answered the call almost reflectively, albeit groggily. John always answered when I called, so I figured the least I could do was return the favor.

Unfortunately, I’d forgotten that John was drunk. “Hey, Porter, girl, where’d you go? Without you left the party me, Porter! Uh, wait, wait, that didn’t come out right…”

I sighed at John’s inebriated voice. “John, I left the party without you because I’m sleepy and tired. Get yourself home and go to bed, alright? I told you I’d call you tomorrow.”

“It’s tomorrow now, ain’t it?” John giggled. I scoffed and hung up on him, tossing my phone aside and trying to get back to sleep, but John wasn’t having any of that. He called me again a few minutes later. “Porter,” he whined drunkenly.

“Cornelius,” I hissed, rubbing my eyes. We only used middle name when we were angry with each other, but John was too drunk to notice.

“Porter, are you angry with me? Don’t be angry, Porter, please don’t be angry. I’m… I-I’m…”

“I’m not angry, John,” I said with a heavy sigh. “I’m just a little cranky because you woke me up at four o clock in the fucking morning, alright?”

John gasped melodramatically. “You just used a bad word! You never use bad words! I made you mad, didn’t I? Porter, I’m sorry. If you’re mad at me because of that, Porter, you have every right to be, and I am so very sorry. I didn’t even know her name, alright? She just –“

“What?” I interrupted John, completely awake now. “What did you say? Who are you talking about?”

Judging by the faint sounds of a scuffle and John’s whining, someone took the phone away from him. “Hello, Porter, remember me?”

Halvo’s mostly sober voice didn’t comfort me. John’s drunken ramblings put me on edge. “Of course, Halvo…”

“Great! Well, don’t you worry about your boy, we’ll take care of him. He’s not driving anywhere tonight.”

“Thanks,” I muttered before hanging up and turning my phone completely off.

Even though John’s words were slurred, I distinctly recall hearing him mention a female and wondering if I was angry with him. I couldn’t go back to sleep, so I didn’t bother trying anymore. I was only a few hours from sunrise, anyway.

I’d always felt insecure about John, but it was always for no reason at all. Insecurities about our relationship fabricated by my mind tormented me on a daily basis, but they were all groundless until now. I tried cooking breakfast to get my mind off of things. Breakfast for dad, anyways. I hated eating anything before noon, but I figured he could use a nice breakfast after seeing mom again.

I was right. He looked worse than I did when he managed to wake up. He thanked me for breakfast and made some small talk, asking about what John and I ran off to do. I said we just hung out with our friends and I tried to catch up on schoolwork. When dad heard that, though, he got a little riled up. He wanted me out of school for the rest of the week. He said I could work, but he didn’t want to add the stress of school to that, too.

I didn’t argue with him on that one.

Before he left for work, he warned me that mom was still hanging around town.

I stayed in the house for quite a bit after that, just cleaning up everywhere and dusting and vacuuming and the like. I also took my meds – the regular dose – nothing more, nothing less. I started rereading some of my old favorite books when my eyes fell on my copy of “The Fault in Our Stars” which had been a gift from John.

I sighed and got to my feet, deciding I could use a shower before I dropped by to visit my boyfriend. I was more than afraid of what I could find out if I confronted John about this. “Sup, Porter?” Tim Kirch greeted me when I knocked on their door an hour later. He looked like he just rolled out of bed. Or off the couch.

“H-Hi… um, I was wondering if John’s still around?”

“Oh, yeah, I’ll be he’s around here somewhere,” Tim laughed, letting me in.

The house was relatively clean, but the beer pong table hadn’t been moved and there were still some filled red solo cups on it. Several people from the party last night were strewn about the living room unconscious. John was one of them. I sighed and sat down on his lap rather ungracefully.

John let out a groan. “Come on, man, why’d you – oh.” John smiled sheepishly, rubbing his eyes. “Porter… what are you doing back here?”

“Came to check on you,” I said simply, not really reacting when John wrapped his arms around my waist. “You called me at, like, four,” I told him, breaking his hold on me and getting up.

John took the opportunity to stretch and yawn and groan as some of his joints cracked. “Oops,” he chuckled, rubbing his temples as he slumped in the recliner again. “Late night… shouldn’t you be in school?”

“My dad’s letting me have the week off, but I’m gonna go to work in a bit. Want to grab a bite to eat or something?” I asked hopefully, grabbing John’s outstretched hands so I could pull him to his feet. It required quite a bit of effort on my part.

“Yeah, yeah. Sounds good. I gotta get home first,” he sighed when he saw his beer stained shirt. “Dammit… did Jared leave last night?” he asked no one in particular, looking around the living room for his roommate and best friend. “Shit, he must’ve left with his girl… Porter, can we drop by my place real quick so I can grab some new clothes and stuff?”

I nodded and we arrived at his house not fifteen minutes later. Well, his parents house, anyways. He pulled me inside and gave me a quick tour. Thankfully, his parents were out. I didn’t feel presentable enough for older company. His little brother Shane was alright, though. Shane sat eating a bowl of cereal in the kitchen, and I didn’t feel like running all the way upstairs after John. Besides, I could hear him showering.

“So, you’re his girlfriend, right?” Shane asked as he placed his bowl in the sink. I nodded and smiled shyly. Shane sighed and shook his head. “My brother is always getting girls he doesn’t deserve…”

“I think it’s the other way around,” I murmured, perusing John’s family photos. Shane noticed my interest, so he pulled out some photo albums of John. The O’Callaghans seemed like the kind of family you read about in fairytales – so loving they’re almost smothering. Each O’Callaghan son had a shelf of photo albums with their initials on the covers, and each shelf was organized chronologically. It was kind of adorable.

“Really, Shane? Really?” John scoffed, shutting the album in my lap and putting it back on the shelf.

“I wasn’t done, John!” I whined, sitting up as Shane just laughed.

“Yes, we’re done,” John murmured, pulling me into his side and kissing the top of my head. He smelled clean and his hair was still damp, which was comforting to me. “See ya, Shane,” he said to his brother as he walked me out of the house. “So, where to?” John asked, walking over to the driver’s door and attempting to open it. “What the hell?” he muttered when the door wouldn’t open.

“It’s my car, John, I’m driving,” I reminded him, pushing him out of the way. John grudgingly sat shotgun. He had to move the seat all the way back to accommodate his long legs. This was probably the first time John had ever been in my car… maybe the last. “Hey, um, John? I wanted to talk to you about something…”
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am i the only one thinking "oh my FUCK mibba is confusing" ?
it's starting to look more and more like lj, and i don't know how to work lj!
i hate this. anyways, enjoy this update.
i'm off to enjoy the new two door cinema club single ;D