Pearl

“You promise to write?” I asked Owen as I fixed his collar. It was unnecessary; his crisp white shirt was perfect. I just wanted an excuse to touch him before the separation.

Owen bent down, his blue eyes twinkling. “Only if ya promise to write back, Pearly,” he said.

“Well, isn’t that the whole point?” I said shortly, trying to stifle the emotions coming over me.

There were tears gushing from my eyes because I couldn’t help it anymore. The whole preparation of their departure had gone well. I was quiet, but encouraging. Now I just felt like curling up into one of their suitcases and running away with them. Momma was not excited to hear of Father’s trip. In fact, her lip curled slightly when she heard that I would be her sole caregiver for such a long period of time. The girls were happy; they liked having me be their makeshift Momma and didn’t mind the shift in routine. However, I knew that while the others would be all right, I was in for a struggle. Owen and Father were the only people truly on my side. While I loved my younger sisters, they could not help me the way those two men could because they were just little girls.

What if I didn’t want to be someone’s Momma yet?

Owen sighed and embraced me. “Now don’t you cry, Pearl. Don’t. I’ll be back soon and everything will work out. Write to me. I will call if I can,” he said. I looked up at him and his blue eyes and his strong pale face and decided that it would be okay, especially if we could get through this together.

I had already said my goodbyes to my father, so he pointedly looked away when I gave Owen a long kiss. I would have to remember every second of it until he came back. We let go of each other when Jane hollered, “Don’t suffocate each other!”

I laughed and wiped the tears from my eyes. Owen stared at me for a long while, gave me a final peck on the forehead, and hoisted his bag over his shoulder. “Bye darlin’,” he said and got into the black car Mr. Moz had prepared for them. Father bowed his head in our direction and said, “ Bye now. Take care of each other and look after your Momma.”

We watched as the car went up and out of the street.

“Well, it’s just us now ladies,” I muttered and walked up to the porch with a sister on each arm. I had to hurry because Momma and the girls complained when dinner was late.

_____

I soon had a routine. I would wake up early to make sure Momma had some breakfast to take with her morning pills. She had gotten better and with a little help could make it out to the sitting room and enjoy her day from there. She knit hats and scarves for Claire; they got tinier and tinier as time wore on because it turned out that my older sister was having a baby soon.

Sometimes I would try to comb her hair, like the way she did for me when I was a little girl, but she didn’t take a liking to it and asked Jane to do it instead.

I would wake up Jane and Sarah and they would have breakfast too. Then I would walk them to school and kiss them goodbye with all of the other Mommas.

This gave me time to clean house and if I had a spare hour or two before having to walk my way back to pick the girls up and make lunch, I would stop by the gym. Father had left it in the care of Jake Merlotta. He had everything under control, but I would pop in and lighten the load by scrubbing the toilets or washing towels. Jake was grateful for the help, as he had to train and manage gym affairs simultaneously.

“Hi Jake,” I said when I entered the gym. Spring was in full bloom and I was actually in a cheery mood because Claire had come over and occupied Momma’s morning, saving me from cooking and Momma’s foul mood. I wore one of the nice dresses Owen had gotten me and even picked a lavender rose from the garden and pinned it to my hair.

“Well, hi Pearl. You look nice today. Going somewhere?” he asked. I laughed at his quizzical expression.

“No. But the sun’s out and so am I,” I chirped.

“How’ve you been holding up? Going stir-crazy without Owen and your Daddy?” he asked.

I shrugged. “Three months left to go. I’m already a quarter way through,” I said.

He laughed. “Glad you’ve done the math,” he said.

“Well, a girl like me has to exercise her mind somehow. Especially when all I’ve been doing is laundry and dishes for eight months,” I joked.

When I looked up, however, Jake wasn’t smiling. He almost looked sorry for me. “I’m sorry about that, Pearl. You know everyone knows how sweet you are for staying home to take care of your Momma.”

“Jake, I was joking!” I exclaimed halfheartedly, “Anyway, anyone would’ve done the same for their own parents. Plus, I am going to school come September.”

Jake grinned. “Well, yeah. As long as you’re happy,” he replied.

I was not happy. But I was going to try to be before I went crazy from being cooped up for so long.

“You know, Pearl. If you really wanna exercise your mind, you could help me sort out this month’s bills and inventory. I basically have no clue how to go about doing all of this shit properly.”

I colored at his language and so did he. “Oh shit. Sorry. I mean –ugh. I’ve been tryin’ to quit the swearing. It’s getting nowhere though.”

“You know, I have never said a swear word my entire life,” I said.

“Well, that’s good,” Jake responded.

I paused before loudly hissing, “Shit!”

Jake stared at me with wide eyes. “Don’t tell your Daddy it was me who taught you these things.”

“Oh, don’t be an old man about it. I’m just saying words. Come on. It’s not like I’m gonna say it all the time.”

“In that case…” Jake began, “Fuck!”

That word was a big no-no in my family, which is why I took so much pleasure in taking a deep breath and brashly yelling, “FUCK!”

“Well, goddam, Pearl. Who knew?” Jake snickered.

“I goddam knew,” I said through fits of laughter.

“Alright, alright,” Jake said after composing himself, “Do you want to help me with the bills or not?”

“Yeah, sure. Maybe you should just bring the paperwork over to my house. Actually, come by for dinner and we’ll do it after. We could all use some comic relief in the Wilson household.”

Jake grinned, “Well, okay.”

I smiled and nodded before going to the back to do the laundry and maybe finish writing a letter to Owen.