Our Guide.

I climbed out of Sam’s PT Cruiser in a rather slow motion, my mind racing with thoughts about how much of a good idea this really was. I certainly didn’t want to go home, that much I know, and I was rather hesitant about agreeing to go to Sam’s house, because hello, I hardly know this boy yet here I am. At his house. Alone. It’s just me, him, and Boomer. Cue awkward silence as I let my dog climb out and go over to nudge her wet nose against Sam’s hand in a thank you gesture. His hand reaches down and gently rubs her head and she gratefully leans into it.

I walk slowly over to them and cross my arms over my chest in a sort of shy, defensive manor. I can see Sam’s smiling face out of the corner of my eye and I roll my eyes dramatically. This amuses the red head and he reaches in his pocket to pull out his house key and went over to unlock the front door. While he was doing this, I took the time to observe the house, a feeling bubbling up in my stomach that felt almost like… jealously. Why was I jealous of all things over this house?

Could it be because I get the vibe of a loving, happy family here? Could it be because it looks so well kept and clean and well taken care of while my house looks exactly like what it is? Hell. Could it be because I can practically see all the family gatherings like Easter, 4th of July, any cookouts, all the things I’ve never gotten to experience, that take place in the front yard. Things I probably never will be able to experience.

I was so caught up in my thoughts that I didn’t notice Sam was standing with the front door unlocked and held open, obviously waiting on me. I look at him and he’s staring at me in an almost observing look, and I just know I’ve got some kind of expression on my face but I don’t know and I decide to let it drop and not think about all the things this happy family does, because let’s face it, there’s no point in dwelling on it or my jealously cause there’s nothing to be jealous of. I’m leaving the moment I’m 18 and graduated.

“You have a beautiful house,” I muttered in hope that he believed that’s really what I was thinking and that I was just admiring its beauty. And it’s true, the house was beautiful. But I couldn’t get past the other feeling in me to truly mean it.

“Thank you,” He replied with a smile and gestured to inside the house. “Want to see the inside? It’s not as pretty inside as it is outside, promise.” He chuckled and something in me stirred at the sound of his laugh. I felt a slight wave of heat go through my body but I tried to push it away before fire-truck noticed. I walked past him swiftly then stopped in my tracks when I heard a low whine behind me.

I turned my head to see Boomer standing at the doorway, ears down and with an almost dejected and conflicted look in her eyes. She looked at me with big sad eyes and whined again. I think my heart just broke. She let out a sad bark and I momentarily forgot I was at Sam’s house, and I rushed to comfort my baby.

I bent down on my knees and wrapped my arms around her neck, nuzzling my face in her somehow soft fur. “It’s okay, girl. I won’t leave you. I’m okay.” I could feel eyes on me and I remembered Sam was still here. That heat that went through me earlier came back, only slightly intensified. I looked up at the red head staring down look on his face with a half amused look and a confused look. I decided to explain only a small smidge of why my dog was upset. No way in hell is he gonna know that she’s upset because at my house she’s not allowed in the house and she knows that my mom mistreats me and all she knows is that when I go into a house without her, it’s not a good thing. She’s a very smart dog, let me tell you.

“She’s not allowed in my house and my mom throws a fit when she tries. My mom just doesn’t like dogs, she’s more of a cat person but since Boomer’s my dog she doesn’t mind her as long as she’s outside and not inside.” And also likes it when she’s not around but that’s very rare and I wouldn’t let Boomer out of my site unless I knew where she was going and who she was with.

“Oh, that’s terrible. I’m sorry your mom doesn’t like dogs. But she’s welcome to come in my house, I’m sure my mom won’t mind, as long as she doesn’t pee anywhere.” Sam said as he bent down and scratched Boomer’s chin. She looked at him intensely and he smiled. “You want to come inside the house? You can.” She looked at the doorway as if thinking about it.

I stood up, knowing she’d only go in if I went first, and showed her it was safe and she had nothing to worry about. I walked in past the doorway and looked back at Boomer. She stood up and went to take a step forward but stopped, unsure. I squatted and snapped my fingers at her, telling her to come. Slowly, she made her way towards me, hesitated at the doorway but when I clicked my tongue and snapped my fingers she walked into the house and right up to me and sat between my knees.

I heard Sam shut the door gently after he figured out she wouldn’t try and run back out. He gazed down at us and smiled. I looked up from behind my fringe and despite myself and everything else I smiled back a tiny bit.

“So what do you want to do?” I looked down at Boomer. Shit. I didn’t even think of what we’d do if I took him up on his offer and went home with him. I bit my lip and shrugged, looking up at him again as innocently as I could through my fringe.

“I didn’t think of that.” I trailed off, and looked around the house around me and still couldn’t think of anything we could possibly do. I mean, we’re hardly what you would consider friends so what do two people who aren’t friends do when they’re alone at one’s house?

“Hmm. Well, do you play video games?” He asked, his eyes suddenly lighting up at the thought. My cheeks went slightly red in embarrassment. I’ve never played video games at all. My mom never bought me any or let me use the TV at all, for that matter. I’ve never been allowed to do anything remotely fun before.

“Um, I, kinda n-never played one before. My mom never bought me any.” I stammered and mentally kicked myself. There’s that stuttering again.

A look of pure shock came across his face, and I felt a heat go through my whole body, and I looked down at Boomer, who in return licked my hand. “Oh, my God, then that is what we have to do today! I’m going to introduce you to the wonderful world of video games. Come on.”

Sam walked past me and slowly I stood up and followed him. We walked through what I guess is the living room and several different rooms before we stopped at a door. How many rooms does this house have? I only have about five rooms, and Sam’s house has about triple that. It’s insane! I would get lost if I had to go to the bathroom.

Fuck. I’ll just hold it, I guess. I’m not going through the embarrassment that would come if I got lost trying to find the bathroom.

Sam pushed the door open and my eyes went wide. It was freaking huge. My eyes scanned the room and I saw a couch at one end with two plush chairs and a bookcase with movies, games, and books lining one of the walls. The TV was pretty big and I just couldn’t believe someone had the money for a room like this. I certainly don’t have the money for half of this stuff.

“This is crazy.” I muttered. I thought I had said it without him hearing but I guess today just isn’t my day. He looked at me with a raised eyebrow.

“What’s crazy? This is nothing. You should see the theater room.” I looked at him with wide eyes. A fucking theater room? He has a fucking theater room! The hell? Who has a theater room just sitting in their house? Who has the money for that!

“A theater room?” I asked. He chuckled.

“Yeah, it’s pretty awesome. After we get done playing video games, we can go watch a movie. It’s like, the best room in the house.”

And that’s exactly what we did all day. We played video games like Halo and Black Ops, some kind of racing game, and several others I wouldn’t think I would enjoy. If I’m being honest, I wouldn’t have thought I would have liked anything I did today. I wouldn’t think I would even consider my guard coming down but I caught it several times. It would slowly go down but I would realize it and put it back up.

After we played all the games our fingers could take, we went down stairs for a snack. I was kinda apprehensive about it. I refused whatever he offered, claiming I wasn’t hungry but I don’t think he was buying it. He insisted I find something that it didn’t matter but I felt like I was being a bother. My mother’s words came back to me but I did my best to push them away.

Finally, I settled on something small. I chose a poptart. Sam gave me a look and opened the fridge and found some French Onion dip and grabbed a huge bag of potato chips to go along with them. He even took out some meat scraps for Boomer. I think Sam became her new favorite person who wasn’t me. We sat at the bar/island, whatever you want to call it, and ate. I nibbled on my poptart, kinda self-conscious eating in front of Sam.

I mean, I’ve eaten some in front of him before at lunch but there he had people to distract him from me but here, it was just me and him and I could feel him staring. We’re about to have a come to Jesus moment if he doesn’t work on that. But I bit my tongue and didn’t say anything to him about it. I just let it be.

After we ate, he showed me the theater room. It was just like the actual movie theater in town. I wouldn’t know that since I’ve only ever been in there once in my life of existence. So I’m guessing it’s what it looks like.

“Wow,” I murmured to myself.

“Pretty cool isn’t it?” I nodded at his question.

“Yeah, awesome.” I muttered. I continued looking around the room.

We sat down in the chairs, and after much debate, we settled on The Avengers. I’ve never seen it but Sam said it was really good so why not? Not like I watch many movies to know which ones are good and which ones aren’t.

I didn’t want to admit it out loud or to myself, but I think this means we’re that much closer to a friendship.

Oh, how wonderful.