Betrayed

(Beauty)
When I stepped into the house my mom was sitting on the couch watching TV, “Did you have fun while you were out,” she asked as I set the diaper bag on the floor.

“Yeah, mom we did. Let me put her to bed and I will be back down,” I told her as I shrugged out of my jacket and carried Kayla up to her room.

After I changed her into her P.J’s careful not to wake her up I went back downstairs and sat next to my mom, “So, what’s up mom? You have that look on your face like you have something exciting to tell me,” I said as I looked over at her.

“Oh nothing just the fact that Brian dropped something off for you,” she told me as she handed me a CD case with a big grin on her face.

I took into my hands and just looked at it. So many things started to go through my head. I could remember when he gave me my first gift from him. It was the same thing a mix tape and I loved that thing with all my heart, until the lies started, “Thanks mom for giving it to me.”

“You’re welcome.,” then she paused, “Have you talked to him about Kayla yet,” she asked wanting to know if I had or not.

“No,” I said getting uncomfortable.

“Why not it’s his child,” she asked in a shock tone.

I wanted to say to her I can’t tell him about Kayla because she it’s his, but her father is one of his best friends and band mate, “Because mom. I’m just not ready to talk to him about her. I don’t even know where we stand,” I told her, telling her part of the truth.

She looked at me with disbelief, “It’s apparent you two belong to each other,” she started to say.

“Mom no we don’t I’m seeing someone else,” I told her getting frustrated.

She stared at me with an open mouth, “You’re dating someone else,” she asked.

“Yes mom I am and we love each other,” I told her looking away.

“But how can you do this to him? Brian loves you,” she said and I couldn’t take any more.

“Well mom if he loved me he would have never did what he did to me and he never would have done it for that long. If he loved me he wouldn’t have left me for another woman,” I was so angry, “I’m going to bed,” I said after I calmed down enough to speak.

I walked up to my room and popped the CD into my player wanting to know what he selected for me to listen to. The first song was one of theirs and it was Dear God, then the other was a Danzig song Let It Be Captured by Blood and Tears. I sunk onto my floor and let the music settle over me. The next song that played was Descending Angel by the Misfits he knew how much I loved this song.

As the CD played on I missed the rest of them since I was so lost in thought, until I heard the Last song Almost Easy. I closed my eyes at the lyrics and cried. The song was so true in so many ways, it was almost easy to let him back into my life, almost easy for me to forgive him, and it was almost easy for him to do the same thing that he did to me before. Why did he had to realize when it was too late that he wanted to be with me?

As I stood up to turned off the CD player his voice drifted into my ears, “Beauty I don’t know how I can ever show you how I am truly sorry for what I did to you. I just want the chance to be the man that you once loved and I want to give us another chance. I don’t know if it’s too late for us, but if it’s not come back to me,” then like that the CD ended.

I broke down at his words and I just cried curling myself into a ball on floor. That’s when I realized that I still loved him even though he hurt me, but some times you can’t change and you have to learn to live with them; like me still loving Brian.