Looks Can Be Deceiving

"Well hey there, sunshine! You look a hell of a lot better!"

Turning to the right, I saw Jimmy approach me as I stepped over the threshold of Matt's home. I smiled and waved at him as he bounded over to me, though Matt was quick to fix him with a warning look.

"Take it easy," he commanded in a rather dark tone, causing the hairs on the back of my neck to rise, "If you can't contain yourself, don't touch her at all."

I was rather appalled by the tone he'd taken with his friend, but Jimmy didn't seem to pay Matt any attention. As if he hadn't even heard him speak, Jimmy stepped forward and pulled me into a gentle hug. It was so light that I'd barely felt it.

"How are you feeling?" he asked lightly, grabbing my hand and pulling me towards the den.

I chuckled, "Still breathing, right?"

"That's the spirit!" he exclaimed, just as the others cheered upon my arrival, "Someone's been waiting to see you!"

"Who?" I asked curiously, frowning up at the bright eyed man. He grinned cheekily and motioned to Johnny, "Oh...hi, Johnny?"

"Not him, silly!" Jimmy cackled dramatically.

"Then who?" I was starting to become impatient.

A bark sounded from below me, and I squealed upon seeing Shadow dashing towards me. His ears flopped and his tailed wagged in excitement as he skidded to a stop at my feet. With a hard cringe, I took a deep breath and reached down to yank him into my arms, smothering him in kisses.

I heard Matt growl from behind me and turned to smile sheepishly at him, "I couldn't help myself."

"Yeah, yeah," he grumbled, taking Shadow from me and tucking him under his muscled arm, "C'mon so I can show you where you'll be staying. Do you remember where anything is from the last time you were here?"

I flashed him a dubious look, "Are you serious? This place is fucking huge, Matt."

"It's okay, we can go over all that later," he shrugged haplessly, placing his free hand on the small of my back and ushering me towards the stairs.

Down the hallway he guided me, stopping between each door and letting me know which doors led to which rooms. I was shown the guest rooms, bathroom, and the bonus rooms. I was shocked to discover that he had a legit movie theater down the hall from his room. He mentioned there even being a fucking gym downstairs.

"This is where you'll be staying," Matt announced as he opened yet another door, "You can always sleep in another room if you want but I figured you'd like this one since it's closest to my room. Also has one of the best views in the house and a bathroom. I figured you'd be more comfortable in here."

I smiled, stepping into the large room. It was nicer than any elegant hotel could ever dream to offer. The room was decorated with several deep shades or red, ranging from crimson to burgundy. The furniture was a dark brown, with a hint of mahogany in it. The largest bed I'd ever seen was placed in the center of the room, draped with silky canopy curtains. There was a desk and chair in one corners, and a large TV mounted on the wall opposite of the bed. Those were just some of the first things I could see.

"It's gorgeous," I breathed, taking in every detail of the room. The blinds had been drawn, allowing the warm sunlight to fill the room. As if I were in a trance, I walked straight over to the bay window and admired the window seat, "You figured right."

Matt's chuckle sounded from behind me, "I'm glad you like it."

I turned from the window and examined the rest of the room. In one corner was Shadow's kennel and bowls, along with a puppy bed and several toys that I'd never seen before. Matt glanced innocently at me when I turned to shoot him an inquisitive glance.

I spent a few more minutes admiring the room before Matt and I returned to the group downstairs. Just as I came off the landing, I heard footsteps round the corner and grinned upon seeing Lyndsey. She'd been discharged from the hospital the day after the attack, whereas I'd had to stay all week. I'd only seen her the day she'd been discharged, and even that hadn't been for very long.

To say we'd become a blubbering mess together would be one hell of an understatement as I clung to my best friend, tears rolling down both our cheeks.

"I-I'm so g-glad you're o-okay," she cried, flashing me a watery smile before yanking me back into another hug, "H-he could've k-k-killed you!"

"It was a risk I was willing to take," I answered simply, trying to keep my breathing under control.

Lyndsey immediately caught my struggle, "But look at you! You can b-barely breathe!"

"Barely but surely, and that's what matters," I reminded her. That seemed to have her crying even harder. It always messed me up bad to see others cry, but when it was someone I was close to...I always ended up on the brink of an emotional meltdown.

Brian was quick to step in, grabbing hold of Lyndsey's elbow and gently tugging her back from me. He shot me a look that I understood perfectly; my best friend's nerves were shot and the last thing she needed was to get emotional over anything. I smiled sadly in their direction as they took a seat on one of the sofas, and it was then that I felt it.

That undeniable, inevitable funk.

It was as if it'd suddenly taken over my whole body. My heart slowed, and my shoulders slumped. I could feel my lips curve down at the corners. My eyes felt dry, and my throat closed. Suddenly I wasn't in the mood for company anymore.

"You okay?"

I smiled weakly at Johnny's sincerity, "Yeah. I'm just gonna go lay down for a bit, if that's okay?"

Matt nodded quickly, "You don't have to ask, Britt. You're bound to be tired."

I didn't say anything, though I did flash him a quick smile. I didn't want them sensing the mood I'd suddenly fallen into and feeling put off or uncomfortable. Now was as good a time as any to excuse myself so that I could be alone, get my thoughts together.

With a small wave, I hurried back upstairs to the room Matt had shown me earlier. I could hear laughter carry on from downstairs and was thankful that everyone else was in a better mood than I was. Leaving the door cracked open, I moved beside the bed and rummaged through my bags for something more comfortable to wear.

I was quick to strip out of my clothes, ripping off the underwire bra that was aggravating my ribs first. I tossed the pink material to the side, hearing a high pitched yelp from beside me. I felt the air rush out of my lungs as I spun around, only to see Shadow standing right at my ankles. Clutching my heart, I sighed and bent down, plucking the bra off his head with a giggle. My ribs screamed in protest from the sudden movement, and I did my best to ignore it as I picked the puppy up and sat him on the bed.

"Don't get too comfortable; you're not potty trained yet, so you won't be staying up here for long," I warned him with a shake of my finger, to which he simply tilted his head. I sighed and grabbed a light cami to throw on, then found a pair of cloth shorts to wear as well. Turning back to the puppy, I sighed, "Might as well start this now."

With that, I put Shadow back down on the floor. I then went through my things until I could find the potty pads I'd bought him. They'd already been opened, so my guess was that Johnny had tried using them while he'd kept Shadow. I'd thank him for that later.

"Alright, bud, this is where we go potty," I directed the puppy, patting the matt I'd put in the corner of the room. He sniffed it curiously, but didn't step onto it, "Wanna go potty? Let's go potty."

Shadow sent me a what-the-fuck-does-that-mean look. It was quite cute.

I sighed, picking him up and placing him straight on the mat, "Potty."

He tried running off the mat, but I caught him and set him back down on it, "Potty. Cause you ain't goin anywhere else in this house, little boy."

The next few minutes were spent getting Shadow acquainted to the bathroom command and placing him back on the mat when he tried moving away. After a while, he became frustrated with me and whined out a little howl. I giggled but stood my ground, and before I knew it, he began peeing on the mat.

"Good boy!" I exclaimed, rubbing his fur affectionately. I wanted him to get the idea that I loved the fact that he was peeing on that mat and not the fucking carpet. I reached over and handed him a treat, which he scarfed down happily, "You're a very good boy; you went potty! Good boy!"

"One step closer to being potty-trained, huh?"

"Dammit, Matt! Y'all quit giving me heart attacks!" I breathed heavily as I clutched my side, heart racing a mile a minute.

Matt chuckled quietly, stepping further into the room with his hands in the pockets of his pants. He looked down at Shadow, who barked happily and scuttled over to him, tail wagging happily. As much of a tough guy as Matt seemed to be, he didn't hesitate to pick up the small, furry creature and hold him to his chest.

Shadow licked Matt's face, "Hey to you, too, fur ball."

I gasped, "Don't call my baby a fur ball!"

He flashed me a quick smile as he took a seat on the small sofa on the far side of the room. I'd never noticed it until now, deciding to take in its intricate pattern and soft appearance. I was suddenly eager to try it out, but decided to hold out until later.

Once again the room fell into a familiar, comfortable silence. Taking in Matt's expression, he seemed to be thinking again. And again, I stayed quiet and let him continue, opting to play with Shadow as he rolled about on the floor. It did hurt a bit to be moving and bending so much, but I figured that it was the least I could do after probably having scared that poor puppy to death on his first night in a new home. I wanted to gain and keep his trust.

"Are you okay to talk for a bit?"

It was Matt that had finally spoken again, and I turned my attention to him immediately. Although I was hesitant, I couldn't just blatantly refuse him when he'd been so helpful to Lyndsey and I already. He barely knew me, yet he was willing to offer me a room in his own home without question. It was the least I could do to at least try.

Slowly, I nodded, "I am."

He seemed to notice my hesitation, "I don't mean to pry, though I do need to ask a few things to get a clearer picture of...well--"

"That night," I answered for him in understanding, feeling an involuntary shudder scatter down my spine. He nodded, "Ask away, I guess."

He sighed, leaning back into the sofa and crossing one leg over his knee, then his arms across his chest. His jaw was set, casting a stony appearance to his face, but his bright eyes shone with curiosity. They were swirling with life and an array of emotions.

Clearing his throat, he began, "I hate to make you think about it, as troubled as your sleeping already is," his gruff tone appeared mildly apologetic, "But I need to know what happened from the moment everything started."

I drew in a deep breath, "Well, I--"

Matt was quick to cut me off, "How about we break it up into stages? We'll only talk about as much as you think you can handle, and when you wanna stop, we'll stop."

I shook my head, "I'd rather just get it all out of the way, I suppose."

He nodded, "That's understandable. Whenever you're ready."

I drew another long breath of air, "Y'all had left not even an hour before it all happened. Lyndsey talked about how she missed Brian already, and we talked about how close she is with y'all. Then she went to go take a shower so that she could get ready for work, and I got ready to get in bed, and then..."

In a flash, Matt had pulled me from the floor to sit on the sofa with him as I felt myself choke up, "It's okay, just take it slow. What happened next?"

I closed my eyes as the memories came flooding back to me, "I was watching TV, and I thought I heard something. I chalked it up to being paranoid, I guess, but then I heard it again. I didn't wanna take any chances," I sighed heavily, feeling my ribs throb in protest.

"So you went to go check it out?" Matt guessed, looking forward as I discreetly grabbed hold of my side.

"Pretty much," I mumbled, eyeing my hot pink painted toe nails, "I grabbed my nine and crept out into the hallway. It was like a movie; the gruff voices, the fear and anxiety..."

"What did they say?" Matt nearly sneered, his knuckles suddenly white and tensed as he sat rigidly in his seat.

"I-I, uh..." Another shiver ran down my spine at the rather sharp tone he'd taken. He seemed to have those moments where he'd scare the crap out of me, "T-they were whispering. One told the other to get Lyndsey, and that he would come get me."

"So you attacked them?"

"Y-yeah."

He seemed impressed, "And what happened?"

"It didn't go as well as I thought it would," I muttered with a soft sigh, "I waited til the first guy went up the stairs to find Lyndsey. It was dark downstairs, so he couldn't see me, and when I was close enough, I shot at him."

"But he wasn't injured enough, and that's when the other one came for you."

His ability to put two and two together so quickly was rather impressive, "Bingo."

He was angry now. I could see it all in his face. He was tense again, eyes stony and cold as he glared in the other direction. His breathing was shallow as his chest heaved up and down at a rapid pace. A rather large vein began popping out of his forehead. I sat as still as I possibly could, watching him with cautious eyes as he brought a large, trembling hand to my face.

Lightly, his fingers trailed my cheek, "And...then h-he did this?"

I almost didn't want to answer him for his own sake, but he already knew. He didn't need my confirmation, and my hesitation only proved to be enough for him. Once again, he fell silent. I looked on as he struggled to keep himself in control. He was definitely an angry one at times, that was for sure.

"M-Matt, I can give you my anger management coach's card if you want," I spoke softly, hoping such a suggestion would cheer him up...or at least calm him down before he busted that vein in his face.

Suddenly, he was doubled over in laughter. I frowned over at him as Shadow jumped in my arms and stared at him as if he'd lost his mind. Quite honestly, I was with the dog on that one.

He laughed, and laughed, and laughed. Nearly to the point that tears were welling in his eyes. His face became flushed as the widest smile I'd ever seen on him spread across his face. After a while, he began coughing and sputtering. I offered a hand and patted his back until he'd calmed down again.

"Better?" I asked expectantly, cocking an eyebrow as he flashed me a crooked smile.

"Much better," he said, before his features became tense again, "We'll get things straightened out, Britt, I can fucking promise you that."

"How?" I sighed, leaning my head back against the cool wall, "I killed one man and nearly killed another. It's not the greatest feeling in the world, and I'm bound to be questioned and criticized by the whole fucking town over it."

"Fuck them," Matt scoffed, crossing his arms over his chest, "They weren't in your shoes, and you only acted out of self-defense. That's the reason you're here instead of jail, and it's the reason you're alive and in one piece. Let 'em talk all they want."

"That very well may be, but I still took a life," I muttered, feeling my heart pump at a painfully quick pace, "No matter the circumstances, I broke a Commandment. I don't know why God hasn't struck me down with some lightning yet."

He chuckled, "I'm not one for religion--"

"Well, I am," I insisted with a sigh, "And out of all the commandments I could go and fuck up, I went and fucked up the big one!"

He shook his head, "Maybe God is more understanding than you think. Maybe he's put as much faith into you as you have him."

I eyed him carefully, "You sure sound religiously educated," I noted.

He smirked, "I grew up Catholic."

I simply blinked in surprise, "I see."

"Of course, it didn't exactly work out for me, but I picked up a few things along the way," he grinned humorlessly, standing up and offering me his hand, "Point is, you'll make it through. I know some people that can--"

"Matt, as nice as that is, I can't let you get involved--"

"Look," Matt chuckled, lifting me to my feet, "You need the connections, and I have them. Just say thank you, and I'll handle the rest."

"But why?" I protested, tugging on his shirt sleeve as he walked over to the window. He stopped and stared pointedly at me, and I huffed, "Thank you."

He cracked a grin, "You're very welcome. And you're one of us now; we look out for one another."

I sighed, "Matt, that's too big a job to take on. I have to get a lawyer and reporters will eventually come looking for me. They'll question me and pick me apart; I've seen Law & Order! I have to give a statement, file charges, appear in court, relive that night over and over again...there's no reason to involve you guys in all this." I reasoned, watching as Matt's features turned blank with thought again.

"Do you trust me?"

There it was again. That simple, yet powerful question that had me caving to his every demand.

I sighed loudly, wincing as a spasm of pain went through my ribs, "Yes."

"Good girl," he smirked lightly, tossing Shadow a treat before walking back towards the door, "Then you just focus on getting better and relax, as you have the entire 5,800 square feet of the Sanders residence as your playground. We've got this."

With that, he winked and walked off, his footsteps padding lightly down the hall. I blinked at the empty doorway before yelling after him, "THIS IS ONLY TEMPORARY!"

His laughter could be heard down the hall. Sighing, I turned to Shadow for his reaction. He simply watched me, jaw slack and tail wagging. Rolling my eyes, I scooped him up and brought him over to the large bed with me.

If I couldn't do anything else about the situation, then dammit, I would relax.