All at Once

Emily kept fidgeting while I was driving, ever so often glancing out of the window. I felt like she wanted to run from me, but I just brushed it off. Knowing that I had set the child lock on that side of the truck, she wasn’t getting away to harm herself this time. I saw her fidgeting once more out of the corner of my eyes, but this time she caught me looking. She looked away before I could say sorry for making her feel uncomfortable.

The truck slowed to a stop at a yellow light, and my fingers tightened on the wheel. I felt the dire need to break the ice, get her to talk to me. Maybe make her feel like she was safe with me. I don’t like to know that she felt scared whenever I looked at her. Sighing, I grabbed a handful of chocolates and passed them back for her.

She looked at my hand nervously, and I felt a bit threatened. “Its just candy Emily.” I assured. “There’s nothing wrong with it. I know you’re hungry.” She took the candy then, but was still very hesitant to it. I chuckled a little when she realized that she couldn’t peel the wrapper off because of the gauze. “Oh, sorry. I forgot already, I’m sure you’ll think of something.

The light turned green and I accidentally jerked the truck forward. She glared at me when she dropped a few candies. But I ignored that, forgetting that she was angry at me.

In order to make her forget that I started a new conversation. Still trying to break the ice and make sure that she could open up to me. “So, what’s your story?” I questioned.

“Excuse me?” She asked, sitting up a little bit and fidgeting once more.

“The story of your life.” I cleared up. “What made you the quiet, ill tempered little girl?” I started messing with the radio, trying to make the care seem less empty. My eyes looked up to in the window, watching her for a mere second. “Come one, tell me. Start with your first foster parents.”

She winced a little bit at the mention of her foster parents. But still began explaining. “Well, at first I liked them. They were nice. Their names were Henry and Gwen. They were already going through marriage problems when I came. I didn’t really help them at all. So I just kind of stayed in the room they gave me, and watched every other kid play at the playground across the street. But even though I tried to stay out of their fights, one of them always found a reason to drag me into one. Henry lost it one day and stabbed me. I was dumped at the hospital and he went to jail. Gwen committed suicide a week later.” I could tell she didn’t want to explain more of that story, and I didn’t want her to explain any more. I can’t believe this so far, I didn’t expect it to be so bad. But what can I do? “The doctors said I should’ve died, but for some reason I didn’t. When he stabbed me it was just sticking it in and he kind of yanked it down after he stabbed me. If that makes any sense at all.” I felt sick to my stomach, and I understood why she was so weary around people.

I forced some words out of my teeth when she paused for my reaction. “What about the second one.”

“Germ a-phobic old lady. I spilled a bowl full of cup cake batter and she flipped a nut. Locked me in the basement for a week. When they found me she had left and had tried to flood the place. The next foster parent died from a heart attack, and the next one just dumped me back at the orphanage. I’m a walking disaster.” She explained. “Then the owner of the orphanage acted as my mother until she died. A day before you stole me. So the cops decided that I just ran away.”

I felt bad about hear how the cops thought she ran away. I thought for sure that I kept that from her. It was liked I had torched everything from her life. But my heart was still heavy with my new found facts of her life. Who could do that to my girl?

“I’m sorry.” I sighed. The truck slowed down and I cracked a window so it was easier for me to breath. It was like I was having a mini breakdown. Maybe I should give her some encouragement. But, I opened my damn mouth instead. ““You life sounds like something from a very depressing book. Anne, that’s who you remind me of, Anne the orphan. Where’s your big music number, and your billionaire man waiting to adopt you?”

Her eyes narrowed and then she started defending herself. She always does this when she feels threatened, then we always end up fighting. “I don’t have one, I have you. The kidnapper. No money bags around here now is there?” She snapped.

“Do you always have to argue with me?” I growled. “Why can’t we ever just talk without one of us ending up yelling at the other? Do I really make you take angry?”

“If you could hear yourself speak, you would understand! Do you ever think about what you are going to say before you say it!? Hm!?” She hissed, adding venom into her voice. But she wasn’t very intimidating. “You act like you have no manners!”

My fingers tightened on the steering wheel once more. Trying not to completely freak out on her. But she was making it so hard, and when I get angry I end of like my step father.

“Ha, do you remember who you are talking to? I’m your source of food, darling. I may have let you into my past. But the way you are treating me, I may never let you forget about yours.” I threatened, feeling bad about it as soon as I was done making the threat. She shut up, and then I felt the urge to push her more. By then, I couldn’t care. ““Well then, miss Emily. Have you decided to keep your mouth shut now?”

“How about you?” She growled, having the same idea that I have. Push me further, both of us knew this wasn’t going to go very well.

I couldn’t stop myself, I yanked her up into the from seat. My hand was gripping the front of her shirt, and when I saw her eyes they were wide with fear. I found myself setting her on my lap and shoving her against the steering wheel, the truck swerved and I had to steady it with one hand. My other hand was holding her chin.

“Stop fighting with me, Emily. I can’t do much about it when I’m driving. So I suggest you shut your mouth before you get hurt.” A horn honked and the truck swerved again when I shoved her into the passenger seat. Looking ticked enough to warn her that she probably should shut her mouth.