He Says, She Says

I was sitting there for about fifteen minutes pushing my meatball around, I couldn't eat it, or anything else for that matter, I felt too guilty. It was the first time I've seen Henry since we had our minor incident and he was being really sweet with the homemade dinner. Though something must have been on his mind as well, because thus far all we've had is some small talk and awkward silence. We've never been this awkward together not even on our very first date, I was sick of it. "Alright," I through down my fork, "it's killing me I have to tell you." He gave me an unsure look, "listen I was really mad the other day and got really drunk and I hooked up with some stranger, I feel so guilty."

I looked at him awaiting the anger but none came. He sighed what seemed to be out of relief and said, "my too."

I nodded my head before processing what he said and hen shook myself out of it, "wait you hooked up with someone." I whispered to myself, "please say it wasn't Sarah."

"It was Sarah," he said.

"I knew something was going on between you two," I said, "and you told me to trust you." I threw down my napkin and walked over to my purse. I was leaving.

"Sid," he said, "it's nothing big, I was mad, you were mad, we both had sex."

I turned on my heals, "you had sex with her, I stopped after making out you asshole. Oh my god, you cheated on me with Sarah, with Sarah, you are already with a someone hot and young, you don't need to do another one."

"We were broken up," he said, "I was angry and I felt guilty."

"If you were guilty you should have stopped yourself," I paced in front of his door and then stopped to turn to him, "I thought you said you loved me."

"I do love you," he said trying to come closer to me and hug me, but I pushed him away. I was just so infuriated.

"I never said it and I stopped myself, I mean if you really loved me you would have stopped yourself," I said biting my lip to keep meas calm as I could.

He paused for a second, "are you saying you have more of an excuse to cheat because you don't love me."

"Yeah," I nodded "but I didn't cheat."

"You know what Sid" he said walking oover to his couch, "it is so much easier to cheat knowing that I won't really be hurting you because you don't love me and you probably never will."

My eyes widened an my mouth dropped in shock "are you blaming your adulturous behavior on me." He nodded and I got really mad, "just because I haven't actually said those words doesn't mean I don't care about you, I mean just because you don't bruise doesn't mean a punch to your stomace wouldn't hurt."

"Yes it does" he said.

I glared at him formed my hand into a fist "do we want to find out."

He put his arms up defensively and I put mine down. We were just looking at eachother for a second, "Sid, just tell me do you love me."

I laughed a little, "I can't now, I can hardly stand looking at you."

"If this hadn't happened," he said, "do you think you ever could."

"Well it did happen, so my judgements on the subject are a little fogged," I said.

He nodded, "I think I got my answer."

He walked right by me ad opened the door and gestured for me to leave. I rose my eyebrows, "what?"

"I can't be with someone who's just stringing me along," he sighed. I was about to open my mouth to protest, but he continued before I had the chance, "I think we both know there was no future for us, we want different things, so it's better that its over now." I just looked at him as I grabbed my jacket and walked out the door, "I still love you Sid."

"Fuck off," I said as I passed him and then I turned back, "well now that we're broken up I'm going to have crazy angry sex with the next guy I see." He nodded behind me and I bit my lip at the sight, "the first attractive guy I see." I stormed down the hall. I'm not the most graceful when it comes to breaking up, though at the beginning of the conversation I thought I was going to be the dumper.

I was totally kidding about the sex thing, I just took a cab back home where I would do the cliche therapy. You know ice cream and a very violent movie. Unfortunately that wouldn't be the case, because just my luck Anderson was sitting on my couch. He turned and looked at me, "what are you doing here."

"I could ask you the same question," I said throwing my jacket at him and then walking to my room to quickly change into some sweats.

"I thought you were on a date," he yelled.

I came out with a very unenthusiastic face, rose my eyebrows and said "and I thought you had a life a part from my living room couch I guess we were both wrong." I went to the freezer grabbed my ice cream and sat down next to him "so what are we watching."

"Criminal minds," he said not looking at me, but rather staring at his computer still trying to figure out his mystery person.

"Is it an episode where someone dies," I asked.

He shut his labtop and looked over at me, he didn't even need words he just knew and hugged me. Then he sat through the whole story, which I felt bad, but I couldn't help it. "You really liked him didn't you," I nodded while sniffling from the tears. I hate this, I'm not a cryer. "Sid, he's a jerk."

"No," I said, "it's me, there's something wrong with me, why can't I just say it? I'm like te worlds best liar and I can't just pretend I'm in love." I sighed and sat up straight wiping away the tears, "why am I not normal."

"You are normal," he said.

I was feeling better, sitting up and smiling "you're just saying that to make me feel better."

"No," he said and I laughed and shook my head, "Sidney look t me." I did as I was told and turned to face him. "You are smarter, mor beautiful and far more talented than you could ever imagine and Henry is an ass who didn't appreciate all the awesomeness that is you." I rolled my eyes and smiled, "Sid don't role your eyes, it's true, and sure you aren't normal, but that makes you real and honest."

"I'm not real and honest Anderson," I laughed, "and I think we both know that."

"About this stuff you are," he said and I looked down.

"Want some ice cream," I asked tilting the carton towards him. He shook his head and got a spoon so we could enjoy seeing Henry die in this episode of Criminal Minds.