Oh Baby, Let Me In

*Frank's POV*

When I woke up this morning my first thought was, Okay, so why am I that far above the ground?
This question was soon answered when I noticed that the bunk I was laying in wasn’t mine, but Gerard’s.

While I still half slept a minute ago, that realization definitely woke me up and got me thinking again.

I’m in Gerard’s bunk, but he’s not here. Where’d he go? And what had happened last night?
Soon it dawned on me.
Right, we were at that club, we got drunk and ended up on the dance floor together. As far as I can remember though, nothing happened except us grinding.

And how on earth did I end up sleeping in Gee’s bed? Oh right, he actually wanted me to sleep with him. Not like that though, we were just lying beside each other.

Still, what the actual fuck?

I decided I’d just get up and find out where he went.

“Gee?”, I yelled.

“I’m here, Frankie boy. Watching TV”, he called back.

Alright let’s go see him then.

“Morning”, I yawned still half asleep.

“I think you mean afternoon”, he grinned at me.

Oh well, does it even matter?
We talked about random things for a while until he asked me whether I remembered last night.

Oh shit. Should I tell him? No, I couldn’t do that. He’d got to remember himself.
I mean, what good would it do to tell him, that he wanted me to sleep in the same bed as him? As far as I know him, he probably freaked out this morning, when he saw me lying there next to him.

On the other hand, I’d really like him to know how he felt about us last night. Maybe he’d still feel that way. Although I highly doubt it.

Why does my life have to be so fucking complicated?



We were currently standing behind the stage, waiting to walk out there and rock this town.
I was very occupied with looking at my favorite human being, while the guys just stared off into space or talked to each other.
I just couldn’t stop staring at Gee’s flawless pale skin, though.

Throughout the day I had been thinking about something I could do to make him remember last night. Because unfortunately I’m not a magician, so I can’t just make his memory magically reappear.
I haven’t come too far, but I’d gotten a pretty good idea of what I could do to at least let him know I was there. He’d probably take it as a joke, but I didn’t have any other chance, so I’d try.

When the time came around and we were finally playing that song, I was so desperately waiting for, I suddenly wasn’t so sure of myself anymore. Should I really do it?

In the end, I tried. I stalked over to Gerard, not stopping to play my part and kissed him straight on the mouth, when he wasn’t singing for a moment.

Gee just looked horrified. His look confirmed everything I was so afraid of. His eyes silently asked me what fuck I was doing, but I couldn’t care less. His horrified expression was enough to make my face fall and walk back to my spot on stage.

What the hell was I even thinking? I should’ve known it would turn out like this. I should’ve fucking known that he’d reject me again.
Sure I just kissed him on stage, but we’ve done this so many times in the past and it never bothered him, because it was all just an act, as he liked to say it.

But now that I wanted to relive these moments, he just blocked me out.
Not that it mattered, the fans hadn’t noticed the looks on our faces, they were totally into this kind of stuff, but to me it did matter.

He’s so fucking confusing. Why can’t he just decide to either reject me completely or to take me all the time, not just in one of his moods.
I don’t see through it anymore.