Edge of Desire

I awoke to ten unread text messages from Kendall.

Should I read them? No

I quickly deleted the messages. I needed peace of mind, when Kendall is around I have far from peace.

My phone screen lit up, Call incoming:Kendall

I groaned and slid ignore, immediately my phone began to ring again.

“Kendall, please stop calling me.” I said with a harsh tone.

“Please just hear me out Jess.” He said.

“No I don’t want to. I can’t Kendall” I said softly.

“Why not?”

“It’s complicated Kendall, you don’t want me. Just leave me alone.” I said as I hung up the phone

My phone began to ring again.

“I said leave me alone!”

“Jess?” I heard James say.

“Oh, hi I thought you were someone else” I said.

“Everything alright?” He asked.

“Mhmm, everything’s fine.”

“Well my parents are having a holiday party and I would love it if you came.” He said.

“I would love to come!” I said



“Wow, you look… wow” James said in awe.

I was blushing, “Thank you.”

He smiled and placed a kiss on my lips.

James was such a great guy, I felt happy with him.

Even if Kendall was on the back of my mind

“Hello! Why aren’t you gorgeous! It’s so nice to meet you” James’ mom, Cathy, said as she embraced me into a hug

“Awh thank you, it’s very nice to meet you too” I said with a smile

“James talks about you non-stop.” Cathy said.

“Mom stop.” James said as he was beginning to blush.

“Oh Mike, meet Jessica, James’ girlfriend!” Cathy said with enthusiasm.

“Hello, it’s very nice to meet you.” Mike, James’ dad said as he shook my hand.

“I’m going to go grab us some drinks, I’ll be right back!” James said as he pecked my cheek and walked into the kitchen

“Jess!” Carlos said as he pulled me into a huge hug

“Hello to you too!”

If Carlos was here, that must mean Logan is here and if Logan is here that means-

“Hi Jess” He said softly.

I turned to face Kendall.

I breathed in deeply, “Hello.”

“You look…” Kendall sighed.

“Thank you.” I said softly.

“Oh hi Jess.” Kelly said with a rather odd ‘chipper’ voice.

“Hey, how are you?” I asked

“I’m doing well, how are you doing?” She asked.

This was weird, Kelly was being nice? Maybe it’s because I’m finally out of the picture.

“I’m good thank you.”

“Here Baby.” James said as he handed me a glass of ‘Moscato’

“Thank you.”

I saw Kendall shift uncomfortably.

“Oh Hi Kendall.”

Kendall mumbled ‘hi’ and walked away from us.

“What’s wrong with him?” James asked.

“I’m not sure, he’s just recently been down, he won’t talk to me about it.” Kelly said.

I felt the need to go save Kendall, to help make him smile but I didn’t.

I watched Kendall drink himself away at the party.

What was wrong with me?

Everyone had a good amount of drinks in them and I took the time to sneak off to check on Kendall.

He was sat outside in the backyard by himself. I contemplated talking to him. A part of me just couldn’t see him like this the other part of me tried not to care

I didn’t want to go through this again, but I put on my ‘big girl’ pants and walked slowly over to the sad drunk man sat all by himself.

“How you doing Kendall?” I asked as I sat next to him.

“Not well.” He slurred.

I squeezed his arm. “I’m sorry Kendall”

He looked at me with sad eyes, “For what?” He slurred, “You don’t want me.”

“It’s not that I… that’s beside the point, Kendall I want you to be happy.”

“Well I’m not happy, I’d be happy with you.”

I sighed, should I give him a chance? My mind was spinning.

“Why don’t you want me? Everyone else seems to want me, why don’t you?” He scoffed.

He came off a bit arrogant, maybe it was just because I was someone Kendall really wanted.

I looked into his beautiful green eyes and caved.

“We will talk about us when you are sober.” I said as I brushed my hand against his cheek.

“Ahem,” James cleared his throat, “I thought maybe you’d be out here?” He said as he slipped off his jacket and put it around my shoulders.

I gave him a slight smile, “Was just trying to make sure Kendall is alright, he’s pretty wasted.”

“Oh I’m sure he’s fine, he gets like this every time he drinks, right buddy?” James smacked his shoulder.

Kendall remained silent

“Come inside, it’s freezing out here.” James said as he grabbed my hand and pulled me into the house

That’s when I knew I was completely, irrevocably and hopelessly in love with Kendall Schmidt.