I'm Not Saying That I'm Not Breaking Some Hearts Tonight

It had been three days since Kaitlin had been to the doctors. It had been three days since she kissed Gerard. She was parked in front of Gerard and Mikey’s house and okay, it was sort of stalking but she didn’t care. She planned to go in and talk to Mikey but she just sat there for a while. Mikey called twice in the last three days but she didn’t answer or call him back. He also stopped by her apartment but she didn’t answer the door. She didn’t feel like talking to him. The last three days Kaitlin just sort of hung around her apartment. Kaitlin didn’t want to go in and have Gerard home alone. But then gain she kind of did want to. She had no idea what she wanted. She called the house, no answer, she didn’t leave a message. She called again, and there was still no answer. She was about to go inside, but decided to go back home. When she got to her apartment she got a plastic bag and through all of Mikey stuff into it. He had several times in her apartment for when he slept over. A pair of shoes, a jacket, a toothbrush, deodorant, underwear, pair of jeans. She got into her car and then drove back to his house. It was dark and it was obvious no one was home; she was relieved but a part of her wanted Gerard to be home. Kaitlin dumped all of Mikey’s stuff onto the kitchen table and started gathering her stuff. A pair of shoes, toothbrush, basically the same stuff Mikey had at her place. She walked down the stairs for one last time and took a look around. It was empty and dark, that’s sort of how she felt. She went into the kitchen and got a piece of paper and a marker from the junk draw.

“Mikey, Have a nice life. Kaitlin”

She bit her lip. She wanted to write so much more, but she didn’t think there was enough paper in the world. She scribbled a few ‘Don’t Call Me Peanut’ by Bayside lyrics. She had always loved that song so much but recently she could really relate to the words. That song had been on repeat for the past three days, she knew every word. Kaitlin walked to the door and took one last look at the house and left.

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“Dude! That movie was fucking sick! Did you see the part where the guy like blow up the house? Ray, did you? Were you looking? Wasn’t it cool? Bob! What about you? Did you like the part when the guy was all ‘DIIIIIIIIIIIE MOTHERFUCKER!’” said Frank as he struggled to stand still.

“Hahaha,” laughed Bob, “that’s the last time you have an extra large slushy, a medium popcorn and two boxes of candy.” The guys laughed as they kicked off their shoes and took off their coats and walked into Gerard’s and Mikey’s house.

“Dude,” said Frank as he bounced on the balls of his feet, “there’s crap on your kitchen table.” He started laughing to himself. The guys started to look through the stuff on the table.

“This is all of my shit,” said Mikey.

“How’d it get on the table?” asked Ray. Mikey shrugged.

“DOTH!” shouted Frank making everyone jump, “a note!” Everyone stared at him. He picked it up and cleared his throat. “I shall read thy note with your permission” he said, speaking to Gerard and Mikey.

“Knock your self out,” said Mikey.

He cleared his throat again.

“MIKEY!” he shouted, “Have a nice life, Kaitlin.”

“What?” spat Mikey. Frank lifted his finger.

“There is more,” announced Frank. He spoke once again.

“Can't live my life;
Knowing you'll be in his arms, each time I blink my eyes;
Know what goes on behind my back; every night.
Afraid I'll never leave; afraid I'll never know what’s good for me.”

Frank looked at the letter again and then looked at the back, avoiding eye contact with Mikey. It was a personal letter; maybe he should have just let him read it.

“Give it to me,” said Mikey as he snatched it from his hand. “What the fuck,” he mumbled. He looked at Gerard, but he looked away. “Well, this is awkward.”

“I don’t get it,” said Bob. “The last part, I don’t get it.”

“It’s a song,” said Frank, jumping up and down in his seat. He was too damn hyper and couldn't sit still even though this was a completely serious conversation. “By Bayside. This girl is cheating on the guy and the guy knows and henceforth the song, ‘Don’t Call Me Peanut’.”

“She knows,” said Mikey.

“Ya think?” said Ray. Mikey shrugged.

“I guess that saves me the time of breaking up with her.”

“You’re not going to talk to her?” spat Gerard, “You own her an explanation, an apology.”

“I don’t owe her shit,” said Mikey. “Don’t get to upset about it; it’s not a big deal.”

“Yeah, it is. It’s a very big deal,” said Gerard as he got up and stormed up to his bedroom.

“What is his problem?” asked Bob.

“He’s just PMSing,” replied Mikey. Frank, Bob, and Ray left shortly after that. Mikey gathered his stuff and brought it up to his room. He had to talk to her, but he didn’t want to. What the hell could he possibly say to her? Nothing, that’s what he could say, and now he didn’t have to say anything. Now it was all over, right?