Things Aren't Always What They Seem
Chapter One: Meeting the Puck Sluts
"Alright team the new season is about to be underway," Coach Q said. "This year is going to be great. We've got a bunch of new guys and I can feel all your determination." This was our last practice before our opening game tomorrow. We were playing the St. Louis Blues at seven at the Mad House! "Tazer, you got anything to say to the team?" I stood up and moved to the front of the locker room. All eyes were on me.
"Basically what Coach Q said. We got to play hard right from the start. I know we've got 80 plus games, but every point counts." I moved back into the group.
"Okay team, I think it will be a good idea for you to meet the ice crew," Coach Q said.
"You mean the puck sluts?!" Kaner shouted. The team laughed.
"Kaner! None of that!" Coach Q warned. "These are nice, respectable women, if I hear anything about you guys mistreating them, you will be suspended. Anyway, some of these girls are into hockey and we don't want them to be star struck when they see you on the ice."
"Psssh, know hockey?! I bet they think we score touchdowns!" Coach Q flashed Kaner another warning look. The locker room door opened and about 10 beautiful girls in red tank tops and red mini-skirts walked in. Everyone began greeting each other. I hung out in the back with Kaner, I decided to keep an eye on him. I could care less about who these puck sluts were anyway.
"Oh my god, you're Patrick Sharp," one of the girls said.
"You know me?" It was true a lot of these girls didn't know the first thing about hockey.
"Know you? This team is like my life." Well this was new.
"Yeah, I'm sure," Kaner mumbled. "Does she want his dick or what?" I lost sight of Sharpies and that girls conversation as Kaner and I quietly decided what girl wanted who's pants.
"Um... excuse me, Mr. Toews?" It was the girl who was talking to Sharpie before. "This is horribly embarrassing and I totally get that you probably hate things like this, but my dad is a huge fan of yours, do you think you could sign this for me. He doesn't know that I have this job, but I feel like getting an autograph from you is a good thing to give him when I tell him." She laughed awkwardly.
"Oh yeah sure." I quickly signed her paper and when I didn't say anything else she walked away.
"What'd you do that for?" Kaner asked me.
"What, it was just an autograph."
"She's probably gonna sell it on e-bay for about $500 dollars and then expect you to sleep with her tomorrow night."
"Kaner, did you look up how expensive your autographs were on e-bay?" I laughed.
"$100 more then yours are." I rolled my eyes at him. Kaner continued talking about the puck sluts and who he would consider banging, but my thoughts went off to tomorrows game and to the rest of the season. I was in the zone, I was ready to win.
"Basically what Coach Q said. We got to play hard right from the start. I know we've got 80 plus games, but every point counts." I moved back into the group.
"Okay team, I think it will be a good idea for you to meet the ice crew," Coach Q said.
"You mean the puck sluts?!" Kaner shouted. The team laughed.
"Kaner! None of that!" Coach Q warned. "These are nice, respectable women, if I hear anything about you guys mistreating them, you will be suspended. Anyway, some of these girls are into hockey and we don't want them to be star struck when they see you on the ice."
"Psssh, know hockey?! I bet they think we score touchdowns!" Coach Q flashed Kaner another warning look. The locker room door opened and about 10 beautiful girls in red tank tops and red mini-skirts walked in. Everyone began greeting each other. I hung out in the back with Kaner, I decided to keep an eye on him. I could care less about who these puck sluts were anyway.
"Oh my god, you're Patrick Sharp," one of the girls said.
"You know me?" It was true a lot of these girls didn't know the first thing about hockey.
"Know you? This team is like my life." Well this was new.
"Yeah, I'm sure," Kaner mumbled. "Does she want his dick or what?" I lost sight of Sharpies and that girls conversation as Kaner and I quietly decided what girl wanted who's pants.
"Um... excuse me, Mr. Toews?" It was the girl who was talking to Sharpie before. "This is horribly embarrassing and I totally get that you probably hate things like this, but my dad is a huge fan of yours, do you think you could sign this for me. He doesn't know that I have this job, but I feel like getting an autograph from you is a good thing to give him when I tell him." She laughed awkwardly.
"Oh yeah sure." I quickly signed her paper and when I didn't say anything else she walked away.
"What'd you do that for?" Kaner asked me.
"What, it was just an autograph."
"She's probably gonna sell it on e-bay for about $500 dollars and then expect you to sleep with her tomorrow night."
"Kaner, did you look up how expensive your autographs were on e-bay?" I laughed.
"$100 more then yours are." I rolled my eyes at him. Kaner continued talking about the puck sluts and who he would consider banging, but my thoughts went off to tomorrows game and to the rest of the season. I was in the zone, I was ready to win.
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