I'll Never Be the Same

“So how’d the tutoring go?” Mrs. Shepard asked me as soon as I walked into her classroom at the end of the day.

“It’s going fine,” I said before heading back to my table. Darren walked in as soon as I sat in.

“Hailey tells me the tutoring is going well so far,” Mrs. Shepard said to him. He smiled at her.

“She’s a great help,” he said, trying to sound sincere.

“Good,” she said, smiling at both of us. Darren made his way back to our table and winked at me. I sighed. “I’m thinking we’ll have a quiz on the chapters we’ve read so far this Friday, if you’d like to focus on those.”

I shot Darren a quick glare before answering.

“Okay,” I said, smiling at her. “That’s good to know.”

The week went by slow, Darren making me hang out with him every day at 4. We went somewhere different ever time and of course it was some place public. Becca wasn’t talking to me and all the girls hated me, or at least were really jealous and disliked me strongly. Darren didn’t seem to care that I didn’t have any friends at the moment. I hated him even more for this.

I had tried to explain what was happening to Becca but she didn’t want to listen to me.

We had our quiz on Friday, and I was relieved. I was hoping that this weekend I would get to be away from Darren. When class was over, I hurried out so that he couldn’t tell me he would be picking me up like he usually did. I got my things from my locker in record time and headed out to the student parking lot, thankful that I had my own car and didn’t have to wait for my mom or get on the bus.

I drove home, letting out a sigh of relief that I had avoided Darren.

Four o’clock came and went without the familiar honking from Darren’s car: Another sigh of relief.

At nine o’clock there was a knock on the door. I heard my mom calling my name from the front of our house and I went to see what she wanted. I was surprised to see Becca standing just inside the doorway.

“Hey Becca,” I said, smiling at her. “What’s up?”

“I was wondering if you wanted to stay the night at my house,” she said. I gave her a look of confusion.

“Can we talk in my room?” I asked. My mom had gone back to the living room, but the tv wasn’t too loud and I wanted to know why Becca was suddenly being friendly with me again. We walked to my bedroom and I closed the door when we were both inside. “I thought you were mad at me?”

“Not anymore,” she said.

“Why?”

“Um, well I just had things explained to me… by—Darren,” she said. Of course. “I’m sorry about not believing that you weren’t interested in him.”

“So you listen to Darren and not me?” I asked, getting annoyed by this whole situation.

“I’m really sorry!” Becca said. “I know I was wrong. I have no reason to be mad at you. Darren really likes you though.”

I rolled my eyes.

“The only thing he likes is the thought of having sex with me,” I said.

“That’s not true!”

“Yes, it is. You shouldn’t believe everything he says.”

“But he’s never tried this hard with any girl before.”

“That’s because those girls didn’t have a problem with him,” I said. Becca sighed.

“Let’s just drop it,” she said. “I came to make peace. My parents had to stay at my aunt’s for another weekend and I heard of another party tonight. I thought we could make up and have some fun.”

“I don’t know,” I said.

“I heard there’s gonna be jell-o shots.”

That girl knew my weakness.

---

A couple jell-o shots and a few beers and the room was spinning. In a good way, of course. Though I’m sure it wouldn’t be so good later. The party was at one of the football players’ house and they had a great basement for parties. The music was down there, and so were Becca and I, dancing like nothing had ever been wrong before this night.

At some point, Becca went to find a bathroom and I went to find another drink. I found the keg, but was unhappy to see that Darren was there; I turned around and headed away from him hoping that he wouldn’t see me. I spotted an untouched jell-o shot and took it before heading back to the basement. I worked my way into the crowd and started dancing again. I jumped when I felt arms go around me and a warm breath on my ear.

“I was wondering if you were here,” the person said and I pulled away, turning around to see Darren standing there, a devilish grin on his face. I turned and walked away from him. I looked behind me and saw that he was following me. I glared at him.

I realized too late that I shouldn’t have come this way because the door was at the other side of the room.

I stumbled a bit, and bumped the wall. I leaned against it for support and by that time Darren was there, standing closer to me than I liked.

“Get away from me!” I said loudly. He pretended he couldn’t hear me.

“Come dance with me,” he said, leaning forward so that his mouth was next to my ear. I shook my head, but he tried to pull me away from the wall.

“I don’t want to,” I said.

“If you do, I won’t make you go out with me this week,” he said. I glared at him again because he knew I would take this offer. I let him drag me back onto the dance floor, pulling me close to him. He started dancing, but this whole situation was just too weird for me. “At least pretend you’re enjoying yourself.”

I rolled my eyes and tried my best, hating the way his hands gripped my waist and the way his lips kept brushing over my neck. It was then that I had my most brilliant idea ever. Why was it that I let him torture me all the time without any repercussions on his end? Why couldn’t I torture him back?

I pressed myself closer to him, one hand gripping the back of his neck. Our eyes met and I smirked at him. He looked surprised for a second before smirking right back at me. His hands moved from my waist down to grip my butt. I backed away from him, but continued to dance. Our eyes met again and I could tell that he wanted me even more now. I can’t believe I had never thought about doing this before. I smiled, looking forward to the disappointment he would soon be feeling. He managed to get a hold of my hips and he pulled me back against him again, this time with my back pressed against his front. I swayed my hips with his along with the music.

This time his lips connected with my neck instead of just brushing over. I pulled away and turned around to face him. I smiled at him. He moved forward and I moved backwards. I knew he wanted to kiss me but I wasn’t going to let him. I felt my back hit the wall of the basement. I hadn’t realized we had been so close to it. His hands were in my hair, his body pressed tightly against mine.

I was starting to regret my decision to try and torture Darren because now he had me cornered and I couldn’t see a way out. As his face moved closer to mine, I somehow managed to get my hands between us and I pushed him away from me forcefully. I got away from the wall and Darren looked at me with confusion.

“You’ll never be that lucky,” I shouted over the music, before hurrying to the other side of the basement and up the stairs. I found Becca immediately. “Let’s go.”

She followed me out of the house without any hesitation, and we walked back to her house.

“Is everything okay?” she asked. I thought about it for a minute.

“Yeah,” I finally said, smiling. I thought of Darren standing in the basement, confused. “I just gave Darren Criss a taste of his own medicine.”