Status: complete(: sequel has been posted.

Weightless

Knees hitting tile. Head falling down. Finger reaching back. Back. Back. Until, blessed with that feeling of squishy skin, the sweet release. Nothing ever changed.

Manage me, I’m a mess.

Chloe Danske was a hot mess. Her make-up ran. Her tights felt wet. Too long had this been happening for her to retain control over her bladder. Funny how that was the only thing she didn't have control over.

Turn a page, I’m a book half unread.

If no one ever tried to understand you were you still misunderstood? Chloe didn’t think so. The only misunderstood ones were the ones with loved ones still wanting to be there. Still attempting to care.

I wanna feel reckless, wanna live it up just because.

And what could possibly be more reckless than gambling with your own life? After all, the only thing that she had ever wanted was to be thin. Chloe didn’t blame society and its obsessive desire for thin. For perfection. She didn’t blame her absentee father or her mother who ate less than a bird. Chloe didn’t blame the boys who had laughed at her thundering steps. She only blamed herself. After all, it had her decision to begin this journey with Mia. Her decision not to pull off the road and turn around.

I wanna feel weightless cause that would be enough.

The only thing Chloe had was her weight. She wasn’t smart. Wasn’t pretty. Or clever. Or a good person. She was nothing. But here, in this cold industrial bathroom, she was getting there. Every slip up could be reversed with a simple finger. Soon. Soon Chloe would be enough.

And I’m over, getting older.

Who really truly wanted to live forever anyway? Happy people maybe. Or the true fuck ups. Chloe was neither. Why allow wrinkles to crease her smooth skin? Skin to sag down to her knees? Veins to pop and joints to creak? That sounded worse than hell. And the only real way to live forever was to die young.

Title credit: Weightless by All Time Low

DISCLAIMER: I do not own any part of All Time Low. I do own Chloe Danske and all other original characters as well as the plot, however.

Chloe and Alex's Song
(Arms by Christina Perri)
Special thanks to Baby.Blue.Eyes for making me realize how perfect this song is for them(:
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    Read Author's Note!
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    Warning: This chapter contains semi-graphic content having to do with bulimia
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    Warning: This chapter contains abuse.
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  47. An open letter to my readers