A Puck Between Us

I sat on my hands and knees digging through the back of his drawers when I finally found it.

I held up an old pair of shorts and a tank top. Perfect. Leave it to Jeff to keep it here when he left. It’s almost as if he knew I was coming back.

I wish.

I slipped into the clothes; carefully folding the clothes I was in and slid them into an empty drawer.

Next, I walked over to the oversized mirror in the bathroom right down the hall. The walls were a familiar shade of light green, with the same crisp white curtains hanging down from the shower.

I began pulling random strands of hair up before giving up and just pulling it back into a low ponytail. Just as I finished with the last strand of hair, the doorbell rang.

My insides immediately churned at the thought. Were they already here?

I began skidding down the hall, before stopping at the door. Sliding my hands over my wrinkled shirt once, I put my hand on the handle inhaling.

Out of the corner of my eye I caught Emerson’s old tee shirt. Grabbing it, I tossed it behind the couch and plastered a smile on my face.

“Oh Addison! Good to see you here!” Elizabeth Skinner exclaimed, but the tone in her voice caught me. Leave it to her to try and hide her surprise that I was back. No one, not even her, expected this one.

“Nice to see you too.” I nodded once to her then to Andrew Skinner.

“Oh hasn’t our little Addi grown?” Mr. Skinner asked his loving wife, who had just pulled me into a hug.

The familiar sense of closure surrounded me, just like the sickly sweet scent of her perfume. It felt like I had a home again.

Jeff was my home.

She held me out again at arms length, and examined me. I stared back into her striking blue eyes, with little gray specks dancing in them.

“Oh here, come in.” I motioned them to come in, as they seemed to approve, once their eyes scanned top to bottom.

“Jeff actually kept this place clean?” Mr. Skinner questioned, his eyes dancing curiously around the room.

“Oh please, Andrew.” She said, playfully clapping her husband’s arm. “Off course Addison here had to help!” She smiled, looking proudly at me, like she believed I was actually helping her son.

I smiled shyly, busying myself by taking the food out of the oven.

“I made you guys some lunch, if you’re hungry.” I offered, not making eye contact.

“Oh my my, so that’s what smells so delicious?” Mrs. Skinner questioned, as she strolled over next to me.

“I guess, but maybe we should wait for Jeff.” I smiled up at her, not fully reaching my eyes.

It was weird, less then two years ago, I was walking in and eating their food, not caring what they thought. Now, here I was, busting my butt to make a good impression.

Well, it is the least I can before the…big news?

“Oh ya, speaking of Jeff, where is he?” Mr. Skinner called over from the couch.

“He’s out with Emerson.” I mumbled, arranging the appetizers.

“Whose that, dear?” Mrs. Skinner wondered aloud. I bit my lip, looking down. I focused on placing each little cracker with each care.

It has to be perfect. Everything had to be perfect.

“We’d like to explain that together, Mrs. Skinner.”

“Oh please, Addison. For the last time, call me Elizabeth.” She smiled that loving smile at me, but little did she know…

Just then, my thoughts were cut off by the door opening up, revealing Jeff with Emerson clung to his side, sucking on his finger.

“Oh…Mom…Dad… we weren’t expecting you until later.” His statement, though, seemed to end in more of a question.

“Well, there ended up being less traffic then we thought, I hope that’s not a problem.” Mr. Skinner’s voice mumbled from the couch. I glanced up at some amateur football team, realizing I couldn’t keep my self-focused on that long enough to distract me from anything.

“Oh no, it’s just, I would have been home.” He said, casually strolling to my side. Everything should have felt normal, but there was a tension in the air that ceased to go away.

Instead, it lingered under our noses.

“Mama?” Emerson piped up, scuttling over to our feet, as my eyes widened.

“Whose this little boy?” Mrs. Skinner’s face lit up when she realized the small boy that clung to us. She seemed to disregard any words that Emerson had just spit out.

“This is Emerson.” Jeff said, his voice sounded strained. Was he…nervous?

“Em, say hi.” I whispered, to the suddenly not-so-outgoing toddler. He did a weak smile and waved.

“And how old are you, Emerson?” Mrs. Skinner, smiled, kneeling down to his level.

“I’m one.” He smiled, proudly. It seemed as if he was almost breaking out of his shell against this new person.

“Is he your brother?” She asked again, glancing up at us.

“No, he isn’t.” Jeff answered for me. I looked at him; his eyes were clouded with worry but also another emotion. Some where deep down I could feel it too? I was almost proud.

“Oh? How is he related to you, Addison?” Mrs. Skinner addressed me and me only this time. My throat rang dry and my heart pounded in my ears. My breathing faultered and jitters ran through me.

It was exciting.

“He’s related to all of us.” I said, keeping my head high.

“I don’t understand.” Her face stayed unreadable, not showing any emotion, but I knew what she was really thinking. I knew she did understand.

By now, Mr. Skinner had moved over by us. His face twisted as his eyes displayed many emotions as it changed by the second.

“Explain this, Jeff.” He said, sternly, but some one in him wasn’t as strong. It was nearly breaking.

“Mom…Dad…Emerson’s my son.”

Silence rang through the air. Mrs. Skinner stayed quiet and unreadable, while you could read everything Mr. Skinner was feeling.

First confusion, then disappointment, sorrow, rage, curiosity, joy, then nothing.

The only thing that kept me down on Earth was Emerson’s face, not burrowing into my leg.

“How?” Was the only word that escaped Mrs. Skinner’s mouth, as it left it gaping open slightly.

“Jeff left in late September. I had Emerson in early April.” I whispered quietly.

“Why didn’t you tell us?” Mr. Skinner’s voice was drowned in disappointment, but it was not aimed toward anyone.

“He didn’t know.” I called out, before Jeff could answer.

“Why didn’t you tell us?” He asked again, this time the question aimed at me. I simply looked up and said the only thing that ran through my head those nine months.

“I didn’t think he was coming back.” He knew there was truth behind my words, because there was. There always had been.

“Well, Emerson.” Mrs. Skinner now focused her attention on him, a small smile shown on her face.

“Meet Grandma.” She said, a smiling twitching a little before growing bigger.

“I have two grandma’s?” He asked, puzzled. He glanced up at me looking for guidance.

“Two very different grandmas.” I smiled, reassuring him with a hand on top of his tiny shoulder.

“Well, whose ready for food?” Mr. Skinner asked, his hand rubbing his stomach. I couldn’t help but let out a small laugh, while I gave Emerson a tiny tap to move forward.

He seemed to get the idea and took a wobbly step forward, before wrapping his tiny arms around his new grandma’s neck.

With that, I once again began fixing the meal, but this time, with a load off my shoulders.