The Letter
1/1
Dean Winchester was not a writer. Hell, he never turned in a single paper when he was in school, which probably was just one of many contributing factors of him being a school dropout. Nevertheless, the strongest urge to write a letter came over Dean.
Glad that he was at Bobby’s house alone, Dean looked around and saw an old notebook. Flipping through the various sheets, he finally came across an empty piece of notebook paper. Flattening the edges down, he fumbled around for a pen and grabbed one. He popped the cap off with his mouth and looked down. Before he knew it, every single feeling that he had bottled up was pouring out.
Dear Cas,
I know that this is a really shitty thing to do. Hiding behind paper is pretty low, even for me. Bobby and Sam are currently out on a hunt on their own. They’ve been gone for a couple of days. They opted to leave me out on this one and I can’t say I blame them. Ever since that day I saw you walk in that lake, it’s been a fucking nightmare. The last thing I have of yours is that old trench coat you always wore. You want to know where it is? It’s tucked right under my pillow. I never go to sleep without knowing where it is. I’m pretty sure that Sam and Bobby know that’s how I use it, but they know not to say anything.
Every now and then, the handprint on my arm burns. I like to think that it’s you somehow contacting me from the beyond, but I now that it’s just my imagination running wild.
It’s just so fucking weird to know that you’re not around anymore. I literally feel like I’m missing a part of my soul. You don’t know how many times I’ve called out your name and turned around expecting you to be there. I’ve lost count. No matter if I ever freaked out when I saw you, a part of me loved it.
You were something else, you know that Cas? Out of all the other angels I met, you were the only one who actually had a heart. I watched you grow and become more and more human until you were basically one of us. You never understood our jokes or sarcasm, but that look on your face when you were trying to process what we said was priceless.
Okay, I’m just beating around the bush. What I’m trying to say is that… I love you Cas.
I’m in love with you actually.
You know I thought it would be weird writing that down, but it just came so naturally. It’s a shame that I never got to tell you that. I hope you knew that I loved you. I’m pretty sure Sam knew, but he’s too nice to point out something that I tried to keep a secret.
Fuck this is getting hard. I love you Cas and that’s all you need to know.
Dean’s heart rapidly began beating and he suddenly felt flustered all over. He ripped the notebook paper out and crumbled it into a ball and threw it in the wastebasket. He dropped the pen and got up from his chair and walked into the kitchen.
He swung open the refrigerator and grabbed a beer bottle. He took a giant gulp and swallowed. The bitter taste made him wince, but it didn’t matter.
He already felt like dying. What could be worse?
Glad that he was at Bobby’s house alone, Dean looked around and saw an old notebook. Flipping through the various sheets, he finally came across an empty piece of notebook paper. Flattening the edges down, he fumbled around for a pen and grabbed one. He popped the cap off with his mouth and looked down. Before he knew it, every single feeling that he had bottled up was pouring out.
Dear Cas,
I know that this is a really shitty thing to do. Hiding behind paper is pretty low, even for me. Bobby and Sam are currently out on a hunt on their own. They’ve been gone for a couple of days. They opted to leave me out on this one and I can’t say I blame them. Ever since that day I saw you walk in that lake, it’s been a fucking nightmare. The last thing I have of yours is that old trench coat you always wore. You want to know where it is? It’s tucked right under my pillow. I never go to sleep without knowing where it is. I’m pretty sure that Sam and Bobby know that’s how I use it, but they know not to say anything.
Every now and then, the handprint on my arm burns. I like to think that it’s you somehow contacting me from the beyond, but I now that it’s just my imagination running wild.
It’s just so fucking weird to know that you’re not around anymore. I literally feel like I’m missing a part of my soul. You don’t know how many times I’ve called out your name and turned around expecting you to be there. I’ve lost count. No matter if I ever freaked out when I saw you, a part of me loved it.
You were something else, you know that Cas? Out of all the other angels I met, you were the only one who actually had a heart. I watched you grow and become more and more human until you were basically one of us. You never understood our jokes or sarcasm, but that look on your face when you were trying to process what we said was priceless.
Okay, I’m just beating around the bush. What I’m trying to say is that… I love you Cas.
I’m in love with you actually.
You know I thought it would be weird writing that down, but it just came so naturally. It’s a shame that I never got to tell you that. I hope you knew that I loved you. I’m pretty sure Sam knew, but he’s too nice to point out something that I tried to keep a secret.
Fuck this is getting hard. I love you Cas and that’s all you need to know.
Dean’s heart rapidly began beating and he suddenly felt flustered all over. He ripped the notebook paper out and crumbled it into a ball and threw it in the wastebasket. He dropped the pen and got up from his chair and walked into the kitchen.
He swung open the refrigerator and grabbed a beer bottle. He took a giant gulp and swallowed. The bitter taste made him wince, but it didn’t matter.
He already felt like dying. What could be worse?