Forgiven

I turned the silver ring between my fingers, reading that word again and again. After all these years it still fits me, yet that word surprises me. The only word it held was Forgiven. Every other person would wonder why it was that word you carved into our engagement ring, but I knew. I looked at the bright moon and I can remember that night. You had been away for weeks without telling me why, without letting me hear a word. You explained me that you were so scared for what we had, because you had never felt this way before. I remember the way tears were sliding down your cheeks. I remember kissing them away. I remember exactly what I said. “You’re forgiven.” and after that you hugged me close, glad I did forgive you. I let out a sigh as I sit on the seat next to the window in our bedroom. I guess it hadn’t been worth it after all.

We had been living together for four years when you proposed to me, with that word in the ring. That night was one of the best in my life, it made me feel like I belonged, like I had finally found my home. But after that everything went down-hill. We started to fight and hurt each other. You told me you had cheated on me and that hurt, even though I knew it was a lie. I looked at the ring in my hand and wondered if I really should’ve forgiven you back then. I love you so much, but you’ve been away for two years now and I doubt you’ll come back to me. I stand up from my window seat and pick up the last box left.

I wish that just one more time I could hear your voice, that I could just kiss you one more time. That once again you’d hold me close and make me feel like I was home, but I guess I no longer have a home. “Can I take that from you miss?” the mover asked me. I simply nodded as tears started to flow down my cheeks. “You can go now, I’ll come by later, but my sister should be there to help you.” I said softly. The mover nodded and they went ahead with the truck of stuff. I walked back into the house and took one more look around it, diving myself into my memories of our happiness. Tears flow down my cheeks as I remember how happy we used to be, before everything was lost. I put down our engagement ring on the ridge beside the door and finally leave the house behind.

<i>“Honey, I’m home!” I call out through the house, only now noticing how empty it is. I run upstairs and check our bedroom, nothing is there, not the bed, not the closet, nothing. All of our stuff is gone. I check every single room in the house, nothing is left. Where are you? Where is my love? I walk back towards the living room, noticing something was left behind. A photograph of us, you with your beautiful smile as you look at me. I never thought I deserved you, yet you had chosen me back then. I picked up the picture and took it with me to the front door. Only then did I see a small glisten on the ridge next to the door. I picked it up, only to see it was our engagement ring. The only difference being the word Forgiven, which now had a stripe through it. I walked outside, only to see our old neighbor standing there, shaking her head. “She left a year ago boy. You’re in luck that you could still find that, if the house had been sold you’d have lost that as well.” she said. I walked over to the fence. “Where did she go?” I asked the woman. Again she shook her head. “I’m sorry dear, she asked me not to tell. She needs to move on.” she told me. I fell down to my knees, only now realizing how lucky I had been the first time she had forgiven me, for now I had really lost her.</i>