Long Way

I woke up feeling nauseous. I rolled over and saw Declan laying beside me still asleep, laying on his side facing me. I get up and go into the bathroom, but nothing happens. Ugh. I take some Aleve and go back to bed.

When I get back in bed, Declan wakes up.

"Where were you?" he asked.

"Bathroom."

"You okay?"

"Yeah. Go back to sleep." He closed his eyes and pulled me in closer to his chest. I closed my eyes and tried to ignore the rumbling feeling in my stomach, praying that I wasn't coming down with something. That would be the last thing I needed.

The next time I wake up, it's because Declan was gently shaking me and saying my name. I rolled onto my side and looked up at him. He was dressed and ready to go to work.

"What time is it?" I asked him.

"Seven-fifteen." I threw the blankets back and got up.

"I need to go to work."

"Didn't you hear your alarm go off?" I looked over at the alarm.

"No. Did it go off?"

"Yeah."

"I slept through it. That never happens."

"You must have been tired." I nodded and picked out some clothes.

"I've gotta go."

"Go. Both of us don't need to be late for work." He came over and gave me a kiss as I pulled on a pair of jeans.

"I'll see you tonight."

"OK. Love you."

"Love you, D." He walked out of the bedroom and I heard him pick up his keys as he walked out the back door.

I quickly pulled on a navy blue button up shirt, and tossed my hair up into a messy knot. Then I put on a pair of black Jeffery Campbell's, grabbed up my keys and purse, and ran out the door without a jacket.

The drive to work only took about ten minutes on a good day when the traffic was good, but it was getting a little later, and people were speeding trying to get to work on time. I pulled into the underground garage about twenty minutes after pulling out of my driveway.

As soon as I stepped out of the elevator, I knew something was up. I walked down the hallway to my office and on the way, it seemed like everyone was avoiding me.

Ramon wouldn't make eye contact with me when I said good morning to him. The guys in the control room didn't say anything to me at all. Martin's office door was open, but it was completely dark inside.

Martin and I haven't spoken since he told me two days ago that he was taking me off of the break-in's case.

When I got to my office, I sat down behind my desk and turned my computer on. While I waited for it to start up, I glanced over the files that were left on my desk overnight. Just the usual work that I was used to doing everyday; employee background checks, mapping out accounts, paying some bills.

I got pretty much all of my work done in complete silence at around two o'clock in the afternoon. No one in the office has even walked by my door, which I find very odd. When I went to the break room to get some lunch, there was no one else in there. Martin still wasn't in. I was guessing that he was out doing ground work or something. It wasn't completely weird for him to not come into the office for a day.

My phone rang around two-thirty. My mom's name showed up on the caller ID, but when I answered, my dad's voice came over the line.

"Hello?"

"Hey, are you still at work?"

"Yeah, what's up?" I asked.

"Travis and Shawn were arrested."

"For what?!" I asked, shocked.

"Breaking and Entering, and a bunch of shit that I can't remember. It's bad this time, Diana."

"Oh my God."

"Can you come down here? Your mom is a mess."

"I'm on my way. Where are you going, the jail?"

"Yeah."

"OK, I'll meet you there." I hung up the phone and quickly grabbed up my purse and keys, and ran out of the office without clocking out. My heart was racing in my chest by the time I got down to my car and wheeled it out of the garage.

The police station wasn't an unfamiliar place for me. Travis and Shawn had been picked up for stupid little shit a dozen times in the past, and I'd had to go pick them up. Declan and Lincoln had been arrested several times too.

I pulled in and parked near where my parent's vehicle was, and ran into the station. I explained to the woman behind the desk who I was and why I was there, and she buzzed me inside.

I walked around the station and looked around, not really sure where I was supposed to go. I finally saw my dad, standing with his arms crossed behind a long line of chairs.

It was set up in the middle of the police station. Two lines of metal folding chairs facing each other, with a small aisle in between them. My mom was crouched down in front of Travis, talking to him. As soon as my dad saw me, he came towards me and grabbed me, turning me away from them.

"What is going on?" I asked him.

"There is a lot more going on here than a simple breaking and entering like we first thought."

"What is it? Who are all of those people?" I came face to face with Martin then. His face showed no expression when he saw me, but I can only imagine what mine looked like. I was so confused. He was walking with a cop, holding a file in his hand.

"Martin?" I looked over at my dad, then looked back at Martin who was walking away from us. I saw my brother, Chad, wearing handcuffs, being dragged off by another officer.

"Chad? Dad, what is Chad doing here? What is going on?"

"Chad organized this whole thing."

"What whole thing?"

"The break-in's at Martin's account's." I felt my heart rise up into my throat, and I felt like I was choking on it.

"Oh my God."

"He hired a bunch of local guys to break-in to these houses that Martin secured so that his name would look bad, and his clients would resort to finding new security."

"His new firm," I said, realization setting in.

"Yeah. He hired Travis and Shawn knowing that they didn't really care about money. He gave them weed in return for their services. Who knows what he gave all the rest of those people over there."

"Oh my God." I thought I was going to throw up. All this time, I was investigating my family. My brother's and my nephew. Shawn was living under my roof while he was doing this, and he lied to my face everyday.

I remember the day that the bag of pot fell out of his jeans pocket on my living room floor, and Declan held him up against the wall.

"Where's Matthew?" I asked my dad, trying to catch my breath. I didn't feel good at all. I hadn't all day, and now this was just adding to it.

"He's on his way from upstate. He'll be here tonight sometime."

I walked around my dad towards where they were all sitting, their hands cuffed behind the chairs.

I looked up at the line of guys, and my heart litterally stopped when my eyes fell on Declan DeSoto. He was looking down at the ground, seated across from Shawn.

"Declan," I said, my breath was short. He looked up, but he couldn't even look at my face.

"Diana, I'm sorry. This isn't what it looks like. I didn't do what they're telling you I did." I reached back and slammed him across the face harder than I'd ever hit anyone or anything.

"Diana!" my dad yelled, grabbing me, holding my arms at my sides.

"You son of a bitch!" I yelled. Tears were streaming down my face. "You son of a bitch! You fucking lied to me!"

"No I didn't, D. I swear."

"You did! He fucking bought you off, you son of a bitch!" I was hysterical. I wasn't sure what I was gonna do if my dad hadn't had ahold of me. Everyone in the police station was staring at me.

My dad dragged me off to the other side of the chairs where we had been earlier.

"Let me go!" I yelled.

"Hey!" he yelled at me, then pulled me in, holding the back of my head with his hand, he spoke quietly into my ear.

"I'm gonna let you go, only if you swear that you're going to stay right here with me. Promise?" I nodded, still bawling. He slowly let go of me, and I wiped at my eyes.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"No I'm not fucking okay, dad! My family did this, this whole thing! And Declan knew about it!" I burst into tears again, gasping for air. I felt lightheaded, and my stomach was rolling.

"I don't feel good," I said, gripping at my stomach. Before I realized what was happening, I was landing in my dad's arms, and I could hear Declan yelling my name.

I opened my eyes and saw my parent's faces in my field of vision. Beyond them were bright lights and loud noises.

"Wha?" I tried to talk but the words sounded strange.

"You passed out, just stay down for a few minutes, OK?" my dad said to me calmly. He looked at my mom and told her to get me some water.

"I want to sit up," I said to him. He nodded and got me sitting up with my back against the back of a desk. People were asking my dad if I was alright and if they needed to call an ambulance. I looked around the room and saw Travis and Shawn looking over the backs of their chair's at me. Declan was peering around them, trying to see what was going on.

My mom came over with a bottle of water, opening it and handing it to me. I drank about half of it in one gulp.

"How are you feeling?" My dad asked me.

"My stomach is killing me. I feeling like I'm gonna throw up."

"If you can stand up, Mom will go to the bathroom with you." I nodded, feeling like I could stand up. When I did though, my legs felt like Jello. My mom put her arm under me, and held me tightly, helping me walk to the bathroom.

"D? D, are you alright, baby?" I heard Declan saying to me.

"Don't talk to her," I heard my dad snap at him.

"I just want to know if she's alright."

"She's fine, no thanks to you."

My mom steered us into the bathroom before I could hear anymore. I felt like I was dying. It felt like someone had literally cut my chest open and pulled my heart out. I ducked into one of the stalls and dropped to my knees, puking harshly into the toilet.

My whole body hurt by the time I was finished. My mom gave me some more water to drink and helped me back up to my feet. I flushed the mess down the toilet and stepped out of the stall.

"What kind of charges are they looking at?" I asked her, finally calmed down enough to think rationally. She cleared her throat. I could tell she had been crying.

"Breaking and Entering, Unarmed with the intent to cause a felony or larceny. The lawyer is hoping that we can get Shawn out with just some probation or something because he still qualifies as a minor to the state."

"What about Travis?"

"It could go either way, Diana. Punishment for this could either be no more than twenty years, or two and a half month's in jail with fines and probation." When I hear the words "twenty years," my heart skips a beat.

"Oh my God. Mom, he can't do it. Travis can't do twenty years. Shawn can, he's strong, he's a street kid like Declan, he can handle it. Travis can't, he's not like that!" I cry.

"I know. But it's out of our hands. They did what they did, and now they all have to accept their punishment." She held my hands in hers, and tried to keep me calm.

"I need some fresh air," I said. She nodded and led me out of the bathroom. We walked by my dad and I saw my mother give me a subtle nod.

"We're going outside for some air," she told him.

"I'm gonna wait here for the lawyer."

We walked outside and stood out by our cars. I breathed in deeply, filling my stomach with the cool Boston air.

"He told me it was going to be different this time. That he had changed, and that he wanted to make this thing work between us," I said to my mom. She was quiet. She had a way of knowing when to say something, and when to just let someone rant.

"He's been home for just over a month. And he lied to me everyday," I said. "He was in my house, in my bed. I asked him what he always had his mind on, and he told me that it was just that thing with Mo." I looked over at her and saw her looking at the black top.

"Oh my God, Mo. Does he know about this?" She shook her head.

"I don't know."

"I should call him."

"No, you shouldn't. That's not your problem, Diana. Declan is a big boy, he did this to himself. He knows Mo's number, he can call him himself. You need to focus on yourself, and your family right now." I sniffled.

"I know. It's so hard though. I see him in trouble, and... I want to help him. I always want to help him."

"It's habit, baby, I know. But you can't get him out of it this time. Just like your dad, and Matthew and I can't get Travis and Declan out of this." I nodded and wiped my eyes with the sleeve of my shirt.

I heard someone walking towards us, and when I looked up, I saw Martin. I sniffled one more time, then tried to stand tall in front of him.

"I forgot to clock out at work. I won't be finishing the day," I told him. He nodded.

"I'll have Ramon take care of it."

"Thank you."

"If you don't feel like coming in on Monday, don't worry about it. My first concern though is your health. I want you to get checked out before you come back. I don't want to take any chances of something happening to you under my watch." I nodded.

"I'm sorry about all of this, Diana." I looked him in the eye then and it hit me.

"You knew." He didn't say anything.

"You knew!" I shoved him with all of my might but he didn't move. My mother tried to grab me, but I was running on pure adrenaline right now. I punched him in the chest with both of my fist's until he grabbed me around my wrists and forced me back.

"You fucking knew it was my family and you didn't tell me! You knew it was Declan, and you knew that I was in love with him, and you just said nothing!"

"Diana, I was only doing this for you. It wasn't my place to tell you anything about DeSoto or your family."

"Bullshit! You knew and you lied to me! You said you were my friend and you treated me like shit!" I was bawling again. I turned in to my mother and cried on her shoulder while she held me. I heard her tell Martin to go, but I never heard him say anything.

When I finally calmed down, I sat down in the passenger seat of my car while my mom stood outside with the door open, looking in at me.

"I wanna go home."

"I don't want you to be driving. I'll get your dad and have him drive you." I nodded and she went back inside.

About five minutes later my dad came out and got in the driver's seat.

"Where are your keys?" he asked me. I fumbled around in my purse until I found them, then I handed them to him.

While he was driving me, I just stared out the window.

"Take me to Sharon's condo," I told him. "I don't wanna be alone."

"It's probably best that you're not anyways."

"Will you take Willa back to your place?"

"Yeah. I'll pick her up and drop her off on my way back through." I nodded and he got off the exit that went to Sharon's condo.

When we got there he pulled up in front of the building and stopped.

"Do you want me to walk you up?"

"No, I'll take the elevator."

"OK." He leaned across the car and kissed my forehead.

"I love you."

"I love you too, daddy."

"Get some rest if you can." I nodded and got out of the car, taking my purse with me.

I walked into the lobby and hopped in the elevator, and took it up to the 23rd floor. I'd taken this ride a handful of times before, but today, like everything else, it seemed to be taking forever. It was Sharon's day off, so I knew she would be sleeping.

When I got to her door, I used the key she had given me once to feed her cat when she had gone on vacation.

I entered the condo quietly. The whole place was dark except for the light above the bar in the kitchen. I set my keys down on the counter and walked in, taking off my shoes and leaving them by the door.

Sharon's cat, Newman, came prancing out of the bedroom up to me. I crouched down and pet him and he purred gratefully. Then I stood up and went into Sharon's bedroom.

She was laying in bed sound asleep. No idea that I was there. It was kind of eery in a way.

I lifted her blankets up on the opposite side she was sleeping on, and crawled in and shut my eyes briefly. When I opened them again, she was staring at me with a questioning look on her face.

"My life is so fucked up, Sharon, I don't know what I'm gonna do. I don't want to be alone. I don't trust myself." She reached over and touched my leg, feeling that I was still wearing jeans.

"That's fine, but let's get you in some more comfortable sleeping clothes first." She rolled out of bed and went into her walk-in closet, and pulled out a pair of black yoga shorts and a tank top that I had left there once.

"Put these on," she said, tossing them at me. I went into the closet and changed, leaving my dirty clothes on the floor, and feeling a little better when I came out.

We both got back into bed, and within minutes, I was sound asleep.