A Physics Prodigy From Ukraine

Oh.
Damn.
I was still alive.

Brendon had put me on the mattress.
It was wet with blood.
And goddamn solid.
I moved to the floor for a reason, Brendon.
“Ryan!” he gasped.
I closed my eyes again.
I could sleep.

Brendon shook my shoulder.
“Ryan! What the hell happened?!”
I shrugged.
Nothing.
As if he would care.

Immediately he was crouched beside me, rifling through my stuff.
I should probably stop him.
I reached out, but I only brushed his arm uselessly.
Brendon was panicking.

“Ryan, I don’t… what is it? Do you need one of your pills? I… I don’t know!”
I knew what to do.
I squinted down at the boxes and scraped one with a fingernail.
I couldn’t grab it.
Brendon peered at the label.
“Valium?”
Yes, you simpleton. I want valium.
Instead I nodded weakly.
I wanted to sleep.
He winced.
“Ryan, I don’t know…”

Well, he had better make up his mind.
He stood up, and I nearly wailed.
“I… I’m sorry Ryan - I’m gonna go get your mum…”
Then he left.

I squirmed on the cold mattress until I was on my stomach.
I leant over dizzily and grabbed the Trazodone.
It was stronger than the Sertraline I had.

I took two.