This Could Be All I've Waited For

“Dreams are the only place I know where you could be mine and I’m yours but only until I wake up. I can’t take this anymore. I just want to stay in my dreams and never wake up again, that way I could always be with you.”

His body shook with painful sobs that was erupting from his dried throat, the mournful cries ricochet on the four walls of his bedroom. As tears kept flowing from his bloodshot eyes, a shaking hand gently lifted the palm that held red small capsules, some falling while he slowly guided them to his awaiting mouth.

He failed to notice the clicking of the door, the creaking sound signaling that it was being opened. He ignored the light gasp and the dull sound of footsteps approaching his hapless form on the cold living room floor.

He was ready to be trapped in the endless sleep where he could be with Jack forever, just a few second now. He eagerly pushed his hands full of the red blood pills when it was haphazardly yanked away.

He was ready to murder whoever shithead it was who ruined his way to almost heaven, but his glare turn to narrow hazed eyes, looking straight at the chocolate caramel orbs that sent shivers down his spine. He smiled, a sad haunting smile that would break any one’s heart, this make-believe Jack looked so real that he wanted to cry.

“I missed you…” his coarse voice whispered into thin air. He lifted his hand wanting to touch the warm skin but he knew that the illusion would disappear if he even flinched to touch it so he brought his hand down again and looked down on the floor. Finding the red tubes and started gathering the scattered vile entities that would bring him solitude and peace.

“Just you wait Jack… af-after I had this I’ll be with you soon. You’ll see… we will... we will never part again..”

Jack felt like his chest was stabbed by rust crusted silverware a thousand times as he physically clutched at it as if it will help dull the pain. He hadn’t realized that his leaving would make Alex breakdown. He honestly didn’t think that the older guy would be affected hugely by his absence.

He cursed at the wind as he realized that leaving Alex was possibly the most selfish thing he had ever done. All he thought was for him self’s betterment and never thought that it would break Alex this way.

He was horrified when he saw Alex gulped down some of the red pills and swiftly snatched his hand and clutched it to his aching chest.

“What are you doing?!” He wanted to yell but it came out a pained sob. His emotions overflowing that he couldn’t control his actions. He jerked Alex and pulled him into a bone breaking embrace as if it would erase all the hurt and agony they have caused each other in those months that they were apart. He cursed at the wind because this was all his doing.

He single handedly ruined what was good between them but he hope to the Gods of Gods that now he was here, he could salvage what was so little that was left of Alex.

Jack’s heartbeat pick up pace when he felt Alex was no longer fighting his hold and was now lying limply in his arms. He shook him in order to gauge some consciousness in him but to no avail as Alex lay still and a bit damp with cold sweat building up on his forehead.

Jack hurriedly stood up and carried Alex to his car. At breakneck speed, he drove to the nearest hospital with negative, dark thoughts plaguing his mind.