Dependent on Life.

Dad screamed so loud I’m sure I was deaf he sounded more scared than angry and he ran up to Aunt Val and picked her up in his arms as she stifled back a laugh. I looked at Lucas and he smiled widely, god was his smile beautiful! It made my insides all gooey and give me butterflies, why? I don’t understand why?

While the adults talked me and Lucas slipped upstairs and I walked to my room and swung the door open throwing myself on the bed and Lucas giggled when I did this, gah! His laugh..everything he did was just..AH!

‘Tired?’ Lucas whispered and I hadn’t even noticed he was laying next to me, my eyes snapped to his and I saw all the different colours in his hazel brown eyes.
‘Not really, just thinking what tomorrow will be like..’ I said honestly.

‘I’m sure it will be better then today was babe, I mean everyone’s first day is torture! My first day was so bad then when I got home Mandy found paint all over my clothes and shoes, Xavier attacked me with paint.’

‘Xavier as in the guy who had his hands around my throat?’ I raised my eye brow. How could someone like him be so rude to new kids? You’d think he’d be nice and try to at least talk to them but he is just like every other Jock who has a thick head and thinks with his penis. What an asshole.

‘Heh, Yeah, we were in art and he decided it would be funny to have a paint fight little did I know that when they meant paint fight they meant “Let’s attack the new kid.” So I had to walk around all day with paint on my clothes and on my face.’
‘Well that sucks, I’m doomed for sure!’
‘No you’re not I promise I won’t leave your side honey.’ Lucas brought his hand to my face, they were so soft and his touch gave me butterflies, why now? WHY? My eyes went from his eyes to his lips then I sat up hearing someone come up the stairs. Dad opened the door and smiled at me then at Lucas.

‘Mandy called said she wanted you to go home..I told her that I would be dropping you off..so I think we should go before she kicks my ass for keeping her son captive..’ Dad laughed and Lucas sighed and I found myself sighing as well knowing what Mandy was like she really would kick dad’s ass. Dad left the room leaving me and Lucas alone again..

I felt him staring at so I turned around and saw that he was in fact staring at me he was so close to me I saw his dimples as he smiled down at me, he pressed his lips to my forehead sending shivers down my spine, he wrapped his arms around me and rested his hands on my hips and I wrapped my arms around his neck.
I felt as if I belonged in his arms, like he was mine and I was his but no in reality this couldn’t happen so easily nothing ever did happen easy for me!

We pulled away at the same time he smiled pressing his lips to my cheek making me blush furiously, he left the room and told me he would see me tomorrow. And god I couldn’t wait, for some reason I felt like smiling and jumping around the room but I didn’t..I just stood there holding my hand to my cheek as I imagine what it would be like to kiss Lucas.

What the fuck Jasmine! Snap out of it! This guy is your best friend you can’t think of him like that!

I laid back onto my bed and was stuck in my thoughts for about 30 seconds or so until I heard yelling in the room next to me. Uncle Matt and Aunt Val’s room of course. I stayed quiet while I listened to their conversation argument.
‘Valary I’m sorry, please baby I didn’t mean to yell at you!’ Uncle Matt pleaded.

‘You think that saying sorry is good enough at this point? When you basically told me I was a selfish bitch? That I made friends with Jenny because Mariah left, when I made friends her for Mariah even though she caused us all pain Mariah wouldn’t have wanted us to hate her and you know that Matt so why the fuck did you say that?’ I could tell Aunt Val crying.

‘I wasn’t thinking, I-I was just worried about you babe, it’s not your fault..really baby I didn’t mean that I’m sorry.’ Uncle Matt sniffled.

‘You hurt me a lot Matthew, you didn’t believe tonight when I told what really happened, then you accused me of wanting to keep the fact that Mariah was pregnant with Jasmine away from you all especially Jimmy when every day I wanted so much to someone but I promised Mariah I wouldn’t do that so I kept to my word until the day I saw Jasmine in that hospital bed I told Jimmy that day about everything! Everything I did, everything I knew.’

My heart stopped at the mention of my name, Aunt Val knew about me?
‘I should have listened to you and I’m sorry, just please don’t go Val please I need you and I know you need me..please baby please just stay.’ Matt cried harder and I heard Val cry as well but footsteps approach the door and open the door I could know fully hear what was being said and the cries of my Uncle.

‘I just need some time to get myself together Matt, I love you I do...so much so it pains me to leave now.’
‘Then don’t go baby, stay here with me, I love you.’ I heard their lips press together for a few minutes and then Aunt Val let out a soft cry.

‘I can’t..I’m sorry, I love you Matthew.’ She said a final time before walking away from her room and past mine, down the stairs and out the door, I was mentally kicking myself for not running after her and begging her to stay but I got up from my bed and walked towards Uncle Matt’s room I hesitated on whether or not I should knock but I pressed my hand lightly to the door and tapped so softly I thought he wouldn’t hear but he did.

‘Who is it?’ Uncle Matt sighed.
‘It’s me..’ I said in an almost whisper.
‘Come in..’ He whispered, I could hear it in his voice he was trying to hide a cry.

I opened the door and stepped in shutting it gently behind me, Uncle Matt sat on the end of the bed with his head in his hands, I stood there awkwardly not knowing what to say, so I said the only thing I thought was necessary.

‘I’m sorry Uncle Matt..I didn’t mean for you and Aunt Val to fight..I’m really sorry, don’t blame her you should be blaming me.’
Uncle Matt shot his head up and stood from the bed slowly walking over to let his tears still fall, I thought he was brave for being able to show emotions like that, I could never do that.

‘Sweetie, this is not in no way your fault, Val and I have been holding that in for so long that this little incident pulled it out of us...why are you blaming yourself.’

Don’t cry. Don’t you dare cry you fucking pussy. I remember Terry’s words as if he were saying them to me right now in this very room. ‘Because Jenny came to see me, if hadn’t of come then maybe none of that would have happened and you and Aunt Val would be fine.’

This is your fault and you know it you slut! I shook my head trying to get rid of the thought of the Waldon’s from my head and focus on the conversation me and Uncle Matt were having.

‘That’s not your fault.’

Yes it fucking is you worthless piece of shit!

‘So stop thinking it’s your fault right now princess, you did nothing wrong. I love you okay, I’m here for you and I love you but remember honey you did nothing wrong..’ Uncle Matt pulled me into a hug and I squeezed him back.

We talked for a couple of hours, he talked about his high school days and how much trouble he got in with dad and the others, when he told Aunt Val he loved her and when all that stuff with Jenny happened leaving out no details, I asked him to give me the truth and hide nothing..Nothing at all.

After Uncle Matt told me everything, I thought if it was safe to say I somewhat felt bad? For Jenny..? I mean there is an obvious reason she did all those things and why she decides to show up again, it’s because she thinks this is normal human behaviour I guess it was the only explanation I could come up with unless she was just come crazy bitch?