A Place on My Pillow

Alex wasn’t sure if this was how slow time normally passed or if his mind was just playing cruel tricks on him. He stayed by Polly’s side for the next week and a half. Or at least, that’s how long the nurse told him it’d been. For Alex, it seemed like eternity since he’d last seen Polly’s eyes open, her body moving. It had been only a week and a half, but Alex was positive he had been much longer than that. Millie had gone home, even though she had been very resistant to the idea of returning to her home and going about her day-to-day life. Alex had told her that as soon as anything changed, he’d call her. But for now, there was nothing she could do. She tried to bend this logic back on the young man. He merely shook his head.

“I’m in love with her. I won’t be able to think of much else. Besides, my boss fired me,” Alex replied. Millie reluctantly left, once again leaving Alex alone with Polly.

The doctors had moved Polly to a private room, on Millie’s insurance. Alex felt better, now that Polly was out of the ICU and they weren’t surrounded by other patients and their scared loved ones. Being alone, although quieter, was better.

He liked to talk to her, just to get things off his chest.

“You know, I’ve never really believed in love at first sight. It just seemed ridiculous to me. How can you be in love with someone without knowing them? You can be severely attracted to them, I think, but not in love with them. I didn’t love you at first sight either. I mean, I knew who you were and I knew how amazing you were, from stories. But I never really knew you. I fell in love with you later. After we got to know each other. After you told me how you gave your dying friend his last wish of not dying a virgin. After you gave me a massage to wake up. I can’t pick any specific moment when I knew I was in love. I just knew one day. I knew that I wanted to spend my life with you.”

Alex fell silent.

“I don’t know anymore, Polls. I miss you. And it’s not just now that you’re in a coma. Ever since you moved in with that asshole and don’t even get me started on him. I know he did this to you. I just. I can’t imagine why. I could never hit you. I had the hardest time being mad at you. I just wanted to kiss you and hold you. But hitting you? I can’t ever even. Anyway, I hope you come back to me. To us. Millie and me, we need you a lot more than we would like to admit.”

Alex stood up and paced, thinking about all the things he needed to say. He had to tell her that he knew who she was, because of Paul. He had to tell her that he could never be okay until she woke up. He had to tell her that Cady probably wasn’t coming home ever. She was too in love with Pryce and they wanted to get married.

She had called one night while Alex was sulking. This was about a week after Polly had moved in with Darren. He was alone, and hadn’t had the energy to get up off the couch. The phone rang and rang, finally clicking to the answering machine. Then, Cady’s sweet voice came through the speakers.

“Alex? It’s Cady. Uhm. Gosh, this is hard. Listen, I’m sorry for leaving without telling you. That must’ve hurt, huh? I know it did, actually. It hurt me to do it. You never would’ve let me go, and I had to do this. But I assume you’ve already figured that out. Anyway, I’m settled in with Pryce. It’s beautiful over here, Lex. It really is. I just, I can’t get over how gorgeous everything seems to be. You’d love it.”

There was a pause and Cady sighed.

“I miss you. You know that, right? I miss you so much. Please, don’t be mad. Anyway, call me back when you stop being pissed at me. Tell Polly that I love her. I’m sure she knows. But, please. I gotta go. We’re going into Cardiff for shopping!”

The line clicked off and Alex was left in silence again.