Fix a Heart, My Heart

The driver had just taken me around town. I didn't get out and instead I told him to take me home. We arrived shortly and I got out, trying not to make any sudden movement that would make me look upset.

I thanked the driver and ran into my home.

I greeted my family and went upstairs to my bedroom. The brown walls stood out and made me feel trapped. I closed the door and ran into my bathroom. I wasn't about to cry myself to sleep. I needed time to think things over.

I sat on the floor but quickly decided to go back to my room and turn on the TV. Why on earth did I do that? The news reporters were saying that Joe and I had broken up and that it was all because of me.

Why would I have wanted to leave him? I loved him.

I went back to my bathroom in tears and took out a razor. It was sharp enough to kill me, but I was an expert at this already.

What am I doing? Why am I hurting myself over some stupid idiotic guy?

I threw the razor across the room and sat in my tub. I brought my knees to my chest and began to cry as blood trickled down my wrist.

The door suddenly opened and Selena was at the door. I didn't know what to say to her. She looked more hurt than anyone.

"Selena," I said.

"Demi, you cut yourself because of some jackass?! Why the hell would you do that? He's not special, he's just some stupid guy who has fame all in his head,"

She grabbed my by my wrist and brought me to the floor.

I started sobbing uncontrollably. I felt even more humiliated. I cut myself for the stupidest reason.

"He broke my heart because he doesn't love me! He doesn't care about me at all! He probably just went out with me so he could get into his fame life," I yelled

"What?!" she yelled.

She was suddenly in shock.

"Yeah, he said he didn't want to be a part of it. People were thinking it was his fault,"

I looked down at my wrist as I pressed a towel against it. The marks were deep to leave a burn but not deep enough to kill me. All I had to do was cover them up with bracelets.

"Who said you were a cutter?" she asked, hand on her hips.

"I don't know, only you and I know. But some people saw it on the premier the other night,"

Selena sighed "You forgot to cover up your arm that night, didn't you?"

I nodded slowly.

"Demi...I hate to say this, but you need help,"

"I be fine. I promise,"

But I know deep down, I wouldn't be.

It was only a matter of time before people really knew the real me.