I Never Meant to Hurt the Ones Who Cared


“Momma!” Bellona hard a soft cry in the distance. She immediately ran towards Owen who was just getting off a kiddy ride.

“How was it O?” She murmured picking him up in a hug and holding him tight.

“So much fun! I want to go on Splash Mountain, Momma!” He gushed before squeaming around her grasp so she would let him down. Once he was on the ground, he grabbed Bellona’s arm and dragged her towards the ride. For a kid, he sure had a sense of direction. When they finally reached the ride, the little boy groaned at the line-up.

Bellona just laughed to herself and couldn’t help but think about how impatient Jimmy used to be. They would both try their best to go to Disneyland on a school day in the morning, yet even with the rather short lines (and by short meaning only having to wait fifteen minutes), Jimmy would get frustrated.

A few years ago, they decided to spend their first anniversary there. It was on a Sunday afternoon, and all they wanted to go was go on some rides. However, when they got there the lines were massive and people were scattered everywhere. She distinctly remembered waiting for an hour and a half just to go on Space Mountain, and Jimmy whining and acting like a complete ass to everyone in the line the whole time. But she loved him for that.

Looking down at the grumbling kid who was trying to throw a tantrum by leaning his whole body towards the wall, Bellona sighed softly. The past few years had been horrendous on her, but at the same time they had been wonderful.

She missed Jimmy so much, his face, his smile, the way he would hold her, the way that he would call her everyday even though his busy schedule, and also the way he made her feel. When he passed, she felt empty. Still, a part of Bellona felt empty. But then nine months later came Owen. He was her little angel and she would do anything to protect him. He was a spoiled kid, but he was all that she had. She hasn’t even looked at another man since Jimmy, and she wasn’t sure if she ever would. No one would every compare.

“IM SO EXCITED, MOMMA!” Owen screamed loudly as he dragged her towards the log/seat. She had been so caught up in her thoughts that she didn’t realize they reached the front of the line.

Bellona giggled and pulled Owen into her lap. She always hated how there was no grip other than the sides, and was always a bit terrified that he would fall out during the drop, but it never happened. After they both got off the ride, soaked, Bellona picked him up and brought him to grab some food.

She couldn’t help but get even more content with everything going on as she watched him gladly chew on the bread bowl of his soup. The little boy looked so happy and full of life, like nothing was bothering him at the moment.
“Owen, after we eat we’ll need to head back okay? You need to get rested up for tomorrow at school.” She told him. He nodded and went back to eating his soup that he just loved.

After leaving the park (and purchasing Owen several stuffed animals and Mickey ears) they got into the car and headed home. However, Bellona wanted to visit one more place before they went back to her apartment.

She got off of the freeway and took a side road, which was cluttered with dark trees blocking the sun from the area. It was seemingly fit as she felt her heart beat faster and her stomach drop more. She parked her car in the mausoleum parking lot, and grabbed Owen out of the back seat.

“Daddy?” Owen peered up at her with a questioning look. She just nodded, wiping a few tears away from her eyes. At his young age, Owen knew that his father was gone. She wasn’t sure if he fully comprehended it though. He had only grown up with Bellona his whole life, they were almost isolated from everyone else.

As she walked down the solemn footpath towards her loved one, she noticed four familiar bulky men standing around his grave.
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I AM SO SORRY! Updates are super slow right now, but things are crazy, so sorry again!
Thank you to everyone who has been reading though!