Time

I’ve always wanted the tomorrow after that day. She had been right, time was precious. I had a hard time picturing what would’ve happened if I had confessed my feelings for her, she was unpredictable. Everything about her was eccentric. The way her eyes shone in the dark, or how her hair was always up in a different hair style everyday. Her need to explore the deepest and darkest spots in this town drove me to the point of madness. I guess I was mad with her. The time I had spent with her smile was more than enough to get me to do almost anything.

She was the first sunrise that summer, radiant and breath-taking. She was wearing a medium length pink dress with running shoes. Her dark brown hair was caressing her back, with her front bangs tied up with an elastic on the top of her head. The five of us had planned on going to the top of that mountain, which was exactly in the middle of the city. Like the past couple of years of our lives, we did what all of the other kids in this town did. We read the books that were to be read for the upcoming year. Our lives were boring, looking back now. Conforming to the city’s every whim, I grew to hate this town. I remember her sitting by the tree, with her eyes closed and her mouth moving with silent words. I was scared then. In such a small town, we had never seen her before. It was almost as if she fell from the clouds, and landed under the Ahuehuete tree. Almost, as if she was waiting for us.

It had been Emma who had walked up to her. Back then, she looked average and plain. I saw nothing special in her, and my heart didn’t race for her back then. It never occurred to me how wrong I would be. Her hair style bothered me, and the dress she wore was unfitting. Emma touched her shoulder, and instead of jumping up like I had expected her to, she smiled before opening her eyes. That was the first time I had seen her smile. Her big brown eyes scanned us, before returning to Emma. “Hi,” was all she said.

“H-Hi, uhm.. Well, I.. I mean, we...” Emma was nervous, probably wondering what to ask her.

“Nice to meet you. My name’s Kalida. Kalida Finis. You can call me Kali,” Her name was as unique as she was. She got up and walked around, shaking all of our hands as she passed. No one said a word, the silence was almost taunting us. She, like the many times to come, broke the silence. I wonder how many times she saved us from the unbearable silence. It must’ve been a thousand times, and with that winning smile I’d been trapped.

“What are you guys doing here?” Her sweet but authoritative voice boomed across the mountain top. We all looked at each other, giving each other permission to talk. A couple more seconds of silenced passed, before one of us finally had the guts to speak up.

“We come here to study,” John replied quietly. Almost embarrassed. With her around, you often felt embarrassed, or ashamed. Her free spirit, always wanting for more, made us feel inferior. As if we were missing the big picture she had painted. Although the life we had lead up to this point in time had been somewhat satisfying, after that first meeting, nothing seemed enough. We wanted to have more, see more, do more. We wanted so much to the point it was almost selfish.

“Study? But it’s summer!” I remember her laughing, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. She always was pointing the obvious, like we missed it. She was always laughing at a joke only she understood.

“Oh come on! Let’s go to the beach, huh? Whaddya say, huh?” She ran ahead of us, and turned to smile. I walked towards her, without realizing it. Her smile grew wider and she grabbed my hand, squeezing it tightly. I remember blushing, she pointed it out giggling.

“Come on, now. You can’t possibly spend time like this, can ya? Let’s go have some fun!” She pulled me closer to her. “What’s your name, eh?”

“Uhm.. Chuck?” I hesitated. I remember how worried I was that she would make fun of my name, like everyone in this town had at some point.

“Chuck?” She repeated, almost confused. I blushed deeper.

“His name is Charles,” Cameron spoke up. I knew he wanted to embarrass me. He always had an invisible hatred for me no one else saw. We had an unspoken battle to be the best at every sport at school, that deepened when she arrived. I never really knew when it had started, but it had been almost three years of exhausting competition.

“Charles, huh..” She added, deep in thought. I cringed at the rushing thoughts in my mind. “Yeah, you look like a Charles!”

I think after that, I fell in love with her. I had always been made fun of for my name. I never quite understood why, but to those that lived in this town, I never looked like a Charles. How does one look like a name anyways? I guess it was because of my lack of intelligence, no matter how hard I tried. I was messy and disorganized. I remember my teacher once pointed out that a Charles should be organized, proper, gentleman-like.

“Well, Charles.. Pleasure,” She smiled shaking my hand, but not letting go. “Whaddya say then? You guys comin’ or not?”

“I guess we can take a couple of hours off, since it is the first day of summer and all,” Allie mumbled. It didn’t surprise me, thought. Allie was just like me. Never exactly good at school, but passing. School bored her, and whenever she had the opportunity to free herself from work, she’d take it. I chuckled that earned me a look from her.

“That’s the spirit, now! And you said your name was..?” Seeing her so excited, earned everyone’s approval. We’d never seen anyone get so excited over something so trivial, yet here she was. Beaming.

“Allie Carter, nice to meet you,” Allie reached her hand, and she shook it with her free hand. I realized she still hadn’t let go of my hand and it started to dawn on me. I started getting very nervous and my breathing go shallow.

“You okay, Charles? Your face is all red,” She pointed out. Looking back on that day, I’m sure she knew she was the cause. After all, she always knew everything. No matter how hard you tried to hide it from her, it was impossible. She saw right through you.

“Yeah, peachy,” I tried to pull my hand away, but her grip tightened. I still wonder why she was always so adamant on holding my hand, always tightening her grip when I pulled away.

“I don’t think we’ve all fully introduced, so you all mind introducing yourselves to me? I’ll start,” She laughed freely, the sound of that freedom filled my heart. “I’m Kalida Finis, but you may call me Kali.”

“Cameron Williams, call me Cam.”

“Allie Carter.”

“I’m Emma Larson or Em. Pleasure, Kali.”

“John Pierre, at your service.”

Then there was silence. Everyone had introduced themselves, fully. Except me. I didn’t think it was necessary, she knew this. “Hello, are you forgetting yourself? Go on, now.” She laughed, giving me a small push with her shoulder.

“Charles,” I mumbled. An awkward filled the mountain top. I knew everyone, but her, felt it. At least I thought so. Instead of her asking for my surname, she just kept quiet.

“Neptune, here we come!” She pulled me with her before more silence filled us. She ran down the hill, our hands intertwined. I had never felt the freedom of running down a hill, not knowing when you were going to stop, or if you were going to stop at all. I could hear such laughter around me, of those people I had never truly seen ‘till today. It was a laughter that made you feel invincible, and impossible to touch. The world was ours to take, and for the first time nothing seemed out of reach. It still shocks me how much she changed us in a matter of seconds, effortlessly. The air clashed with our premature bodies, the ground underneath pounding against our footsteps.

We kept on running, adrenaline pushing us further. We ran and ran. I had never felt the freedom I felt that day. We kept on running until we reached our destination. The beach, the place were we would spend countless hours to come. Hours I wish I could give her back. The waves that would be the end of our summer, clashing against the sunrise. The crystal clear water had become polluted with the monster of her memory. A monster that would haunt us for the rest of our lives.

“C’est la vie!” I remember her shouting at the top of her lungs towards the vast ocean. “Now, isn’t this much funner?”

“There’s nothing to do at the beach though..” Emma cheekily complained. That would be the last complain we’d ever hear that summer. No one made a complain after that day, I still remember her laughter after Emma’s retort. It was exasperated, almost shocked anyone could say such thing.

“Don’t be such a bore,” She replied. She could be really cold at times. “Take what you have and make something of it. Time is ours', fellas.”

And she laughed. So loudly and carelessly we all ended up joining. Emma never complained after that day, and time had started ticking.

“Time is ours',” she’d always say. It was little things she said that made you love her more. It felt as if we were all part of her future, like she planned on staying. In this town, we all grew up surrounded by selfishness and a lonesome life. Belonging to something, no matter how small, filled our hearts. With time, we were overflowing with the need to be around her. We all grew dependent on seeing her, so it was no surprise that after that day, we would never be the same.