Status: One Shot
And Counting
twenty four.
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“How is a raven like a writing desk?” Genevieve thought out loud, pensively peering out of the small window. Her apartment- dark, and unfriendly, creaked and whistled as the wind blew through the open window.
She sighed and chewed her pen. Every time she closed her eyes, her mind lit up, and swirled with pulsating shapes and colors. It was- of course, all in her mind.
She did not see Wonderland, in which she was writing about, but she did see something wonderful in itself.
She saw the span of twenty four months fly by in her head. She couldn’t decide if they were the best twenty four months, or the worst twenty four months of her life.
All she knew, was that her bright blue eyes had lost that familiar spark, and she was always cold.
Twenty four months ago, to the date, was when she met him.
- “We know eachother, im sure of it!” A cute boy said awkwardly, smiling, and shaking his hair out of his eyes.
Genevieve laughed, she wasn’t a big flirter. “Does that usually work?” She joked sweetly, brushing his arm with her hand.
He flashed a gorgeous smile.
“Im Chris, and are you sure we haven’t met?” The boy smiled, watching Genevieve’s eyes light up. “I cant believe Jordan hadn’t introduced us before”
Genevieve laughed, knowing Jordan.
She was pretty used to hectic lifestyles. Her step brother, Jordan Raine, frontman of an up and coming band, had brought her hands on into the performing world.
Genevieve was more of a writer. She was quiet, and she kept to herself.
She had beautiful blue eyes, dirty blonde hair, and her face was delicately sprinkled with freckles. She never really received much attention from boys. –
…
She looked up from her paper and sighed. She remembered that first day so clearly.
She let her eyes wander around the room until they rested on a bulletin board resting on the floor, seeming to hide behind a stack of books. She had placed it that way of course.
It was filled with silly photos of her and Chris. He was her best friend, after all.
“Best friends don’t fall in love with eachother.” She mumbled, returning to her paper.
She was writing a paper on how the novel Alice Through The Looking Glass could have been used as a sort of warning to modern day readers.
After hours of staring at blank pages, she finally understood the point of the assignment. Getting lost in a dreamland was dangerous, and regardless of the scenario, not real.
She scribbled a few ideas on the paper, before sighing, and closing her eyes.
She leaned back, letting the cool air coming in from the window hit the back of her neck.
-
“Gen, sneaking out isn’t that big of a deal.” Chris groaned through her bedroom window.
“Yes it is, now go. Plus, I have finals to study for.” Genevieve sighed, looking outside at her best friend sitting on her front lawn pouting.
“No you don’t, its your senior year, you can fuck around and not get in trouble.” Chris smiled mischievously, tossing a pebble in through her window.
“How would you know, ‘mister drop out of school and tour the world in a rock band’.” Genevieve laughed, reaching out the window and grabbing his hand.
She playfully swatted at him as he smiled, and looked up at her with his gorgeous green eyes.
She sighed and let him help her out through the window.
“What are we gonna do now?” She asked, afraid her parents would catch her, but also excited.
“I got bud, and a shitload of stories.” Chris smiled.
Genevieve shook her head and laughed as he took off running, and she chased him.
She loved when he visited home after being on tour for awhile. Missouri was boring. Her parents irritated her, Jordan was never home, and she was far too shy to make too many friends.
“Lets just chill here.” Chris said calmly, plopping down in the middle of a grassy field.
“Cant we get caught?” She asked nervously, tugging on her hair.
“By who, the lizards?” Chris teased, pointing to a little lizard scampering around in the grass.
He rolled up a blunt and passed it to Gen first. She looked at him regretfully.
He laughed. “Gen, you’ve smoked pot before.”
She nodded and took a drag. Her muscles felt relaxed, and the butterflies in her stomach began to increase.
An hour passed. The two were in wonderland.
They were leaned up against a tree happily. Genevieve had her head rested on his shoulder, he smiled, he loved spending time with his best friend. It wasn’t easy being on tour.
The two still hadn’t recovered from their high, and were perfectly content with that.
The Doors were playing softly from Chris’ iPhone, and Genevieve’s stomach began to churn. Before realizing what she was about to do, well, she did it.
“I love you.” She said. High enough to say it, and sober enough to regret it.
“I love you too kiddo.” Chris smiled back.
Genevieve’s expression darkened. “No, I mean-“ she started, but was cut off.
“Gen, wait.” Chris said, confusedly.
“Yeah.” She whispered in the dark, not wanting to look at him.
He sighed, his voice shaky and panicky. “No, Gen, this isn’t supposed to happen.”
Genevieve looked at him, her eyes welled up with tears. Chris’ face fell.
“Please don’t cry, Gen, its probably the pot, you don’t mean it.” Chris said nervously.
She forced a laugh through her tears. “Its not though. Ive wanted to say that for months. Ive loved you for months.”
The words came out fast, and unpredicted. Her mind swimming, and her heart racing.
“I cant.” Chris said shakily. He shook his head and walked away. Leaving her alone to cry.
-
Alone. That was Genevieve’s favorite word.
The was always alone, so that called for the use of the word alone.
She picked up her pen again, and began to write.
“In a Wonderland they lie, Dreaming as the days go by, Dreaming as the summers die: Ever drifting down the stream- Lingering in the golden gleam- Life, what is it but a dream?”
Lewis Carroll was a brilliant man, Genevieve thought to herself.
Because she was always alone, she spent the majority of her days daydreaming. Wondering what she could have done differently, how the scenarios could have played out differently.
No, she didn’t regret telling him, but she regretted going back into things after telling him.
-
“Please let me in.” Gen croaked, knocking on Chris’ door, knowing he could hear her. He was clearly taken aback by her whole ‘love confession’
He opened the door and pulled her into his arms, she cried into his chest, apologizing.
He looked at her and begged her to stop crying, to stop apologizing.
Through her tears, she looked back up at him.
He bit his lip as he searched for the right words to say.
As Genevieve opened her mouth to speak, he cut her off by pressing his lips to hers.
Clearly taken aback, yet pleasantly surprised, she returned the kiss. Obviously.
After what seemed like hours, the two pulled apart.
Neither of them knew what to say.
“I think you should go now.” Chris said regretfully.
Genevieve’s heart sank, as she stood there in disbelief, horrorstruck at the fact that her heart had just broken into what seemed like a thousand little pieces.
-
She smiled bitterly, recalling one of her least favorite memories.
She wrote down another quote from the novel.
“Sentence first, verdict afterward.”
In the book, that line is shouted by the Queen of Hearts, during a trial, in which she is desperate to remove someone’s head.
Of course, in reality, things like that didn’t happen.
To Genevieve, the line described her life perfectly. She felt as if her life was already planned out, like a death sentence. You live, you breathe, you die. There was no stopping.
But after you die, that’s what counts. Where do you go after you die? What do you see? Who judges you? That was the verdict.
On A lighter note, it could also be interpreted differently.
Putting it into perspective, to Genevieve, it meant living to the fullest, ignoring the consequences, and following your gut, even if it meant heartbreak.
At that moment, Genevieve knew what to do for her assignment. She tossed her previously scribbled on paper into the trash, and pulled out a clean sheet.
Dear You,
“Curiouser and Curiouser.” The perfect way to describe Wonderland, and the perfect way to describe you. Everything was different with you, nothing was forced, nothing was hard. Besides you. You were positively terrible at body language, and I could never read you, or your emotions.
You were a guessing game, a fork in the road with no signs for direction. I guess that’s what was fun about you. It was always a chase. You were my best friend, but you were more than that. I loved you so much, you were so different than the rest. I was so happy to have you as a friend.
As the months passed, I started to see things differently. I didn’t expect to feel this way. I never expected to fall for you. I never anticipated any of this; but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t happy. You’d be lying if you said you never felt the same. I guess we’re both liars, because I’m miserable, and you’re gone. That brings us back to today. Twenty four months since I met you. Twenty four months and counting.
“When I used to read fairy-tales, I fancied that kind of thing never happened, and now here I am in the middle of one!”
― Lewis Carroll
Sincerely, Me.
............
............
“How is a raven like a writing desk?” Genevieve thought out loud, pensively peering out of the small window. Her apartment- dark, and unfriendly, creaked and whistled as the wind blew through the open window.
She sighed and chewed her pen. Every time she closed her eyes, her mind lit up, and swirled with pulsating shapes and colors. It was- of course, all in her mind.
She did not see Wonderland, in which she was writing about, but she did see something wonderful in itself.
She saw the span of twenty four months fly by in her head. She couldn’t decide if they were the best twenty four months, or the worst twenty four months of her life.
All she knew, was that her bright blue eyes had lost that familiar spark, and she was always cold.
Twenty four months ago, to the date, was when she met him.
- “We know eachother, im sure of it!” A cute boy said awkwardly, smiling, and shaking his hair out of his eyes.
Genevieve laughed, she wasn’t a big flirter. “Does that usually work?” She joked sweetly, brushing his arm with her hand.
He flashed a gorgeous smile.
“Im Chris, and are you sure we haven’t met?” The boy smiled, watching Genevieve’s eyes light up. “I cant believe Jordan hadn’t introduced us before”
Genevieve laughed, knowing Jordan.
She was pretty used to hectic lifestyles. Her step brother, Jordan Raine, frontman of an up and coming band, had brought her hands on into the performing world.
Genevieve was more of a writer. She was quiet, and she kept to herself.
She had beautiful blue eyes, dirty blonde hair, and her face was delicately sprinkled with freckles. She never really received much attention from boys. –
…
She looked up from her paper and sighed. She remembered that first day so clearly.
She let her eyes wander around the room until they rested on a bulletin board resting on the floor, seeming to hide behind a stack of books. She had placed it that way of course.
It was filled with silly photos of her and Chris. He was her best friend, after all.
“Best friends don’t fall in love with eachother.” She mumbled, returning to her paper.
She was writing a paper on how the novel Alice Through The Looking Glass could have been used as a sort of warning to modern day readers.
After hours of staring at blank pages, she finally understood the point of the assignment. Getting lost in a dreamland was dangerous, and regardless of the scenario, not real.
She scribbled a few ideas on the paper, before sighing, and closing her eyes.
She leaned back, letting the cool air coming in from the window hit the back of her neck.
-
“Gen, sneaking out isn’t that big of a deal.” Chris groaned through her bedroom window.
“Yes it is, now go. Plus, I have finals to study for.” Genevieve sighed, looking outside at her best friend sitting on her front lawn pouting.
“No you don’t, its your senior year, you can fuck around and not get in trouble.” Chris smiled mischievously, tossing a pebble in through her window.
“How would you know, ‘mister drop out of school and tour the world in a rock band’.” Genevieve laughed, reaching out the window and grabbing his hand.
She playfully swatted at him as he smiled, and looked up at her with his gorgeous green eyes.
She sighed and let him help her out through the window.
“What are we gonna do now?” She asked, afraid her parents would catch her, but also excited.
“I got bud, and a shitload of stories.” Chris smiled.
Genevieve shook her head and laughed as he took off running, and she chased him.
She loved when he visited home after being on tour for awhile. Missouri was boring. Her parents irritated her, Jordan was never home, and she was far too shy to make too many friends.
“Lets just chill here.” Chris said calmly, plopping down in the middle of a grassy field.
“Cant we get caught?” She asked nervously, tugging on her hair.
“By who, the lizards?” Chris teased, pointing to a little lizard scampering around in the grass.
He rolled up a blunt and passed it to Gen first. She looked at him regretfully.
He laughed. “Gen, you’ve smoked pot before.”
She nodded and took a drag. Her muscles felt relaxed, and the butterflies in her stomach began to increase.
An hour passed. The two were in wonderland.
They were leaned up against a tree happily. Genevieve had her head rested on his shoulder, he smiled, he loved spending time with his best friend. It wasn’t easy being on tour.
The two still hadn’t recovered from their high, and were perfectly content with that.
The Doors were playing softly from Chris’ iPhone, and Genevieve’s stomach began to churn. Before realizing what she was about to do, well, she did it.
“I love you.” She said. High enough to say it, and sober enough to regret it.
“I love you too kiddo.” Chris smiled back.
Genevieve’s expression darkened. “No, I mean-“ she started, but was cut off.
“Gen, wait.” Chris said, confusedly.
“Yeah.” She whispered in the dark, not wanting to look at him.
He sighed, his voice shaky and panicky. “No, Gen, this isn’t supposed to happen.”
Genevieve looked at him, her eyes welled up with tears. Chris’ face fell.
“Please don’t cry, Gen, its probably the pot, you don’t mean it.” Chris said nervously.
She forced a laugh through her tears. “Its not though. Ive wanted to say that for months. Ive loved you for months.”
The words came out fast, and unpredicted. Her mind swimming, and her heart racing.
“I cant.” Chris said shakily. He shook his head and walked away. Leaving her alone to cry.
-
Alone. That was Genevieve’s favorite word.
The was always alone, so that called for the use of the word alone.
She picked up her pen again, and began to write.
“In a Wonderland they lie, Dreaming as the days go by, Dreaming as the summers die: Ever drifting down the stream- Lingering in the golden gleam- Life, what is it but a dream?”
Lewis Carroll was a brilliant man, Genevieve thought to herself.
Because she was always alone, she spent the majority of her days daydreaming. Wondering what she could have done differently, how the scenarios could have played out differently.
No, she didn’t regret telling him, but she regretted going back into things after telling him.
-
“Please let me in.” Gen croaked, knocking on Chris’ door, knowing he could hear her. He was clearly taken aback by her whole ‘love confession’
He opened the door and pulled her into his arms, she cried into his chest, apologizing.
He looked at her and begged her to stop crying, to stop apologizing.
Through her tears, she looked back up at him.
He bit his lip as he searched for the right words to say.
As Genevieve opened her mouth to speak, he cut her off by pressing his lips to hers.
Clearly taken aback, yet pleasantly surprised, she returned the kiss. Obviously.
After what seemed like hours, the two pulled apart.
Neither of them knew what to say.
“I think you should go now.” Chris said regretfully.
Genevieve’s heart sank, as she stood there in disbelief, horrorstruck at the fact that her heart had just broken into what seemed like a thousand little pieces.
-
She smiled bitterly, recalling one of her least favorite memories.
She wrote down another quote from the novel.
“Sentence first, verdict afterward.”
In the book, that line is shouted by the Queen of Hearts, during a trial, in which she is desperate to remove someone’s head.
Of course, in reality, things like that didn’t happen.
To Genevieve, the line described her life perfectly. She felt as if her life was already planned out, like a death sentence. You live, you breathe, you die. There was no stopping.
But after you die, that’s what counts. Where do you go after you die? What do you see? Who judges you? That was the verdict.
On A lighter note, it could also be interpreted differently.
Putting it into perspective, to Genevieve, it meant living to the fullest, ignoring the consequences, and following your gut, even if it meant heartbreak.
At that moment, Genevieve knew what to do for her assignment. She tossed her previously scribbled on paper into the trash, and pulled out a clean sheet.
Dear You,
“Curiouser and Curiouser.” The perfect way to describe Wonderland, and the perfect way to describe you. Everything was different with you, nothing was forced, nothing was hard. Besides you. You were positively terrible at body language, and I could never read you, or your emotions.
You were a guessing game, a fork in the road with no signs for direction. I guess that’s what was fun about you. It was always a chase. You were my best friend, but you were more than that. I loved you so much, you were so different than the rest. I was so happy to have you as a friend.
As the months passed, I started to see things differently. I didn’t expect to feel this way. I never expected to fall for you. I never anticipated any of this; but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t happy. You’d be lying if you said you never felt the same. I guess we’re both liars, because I’m miserable, and you’re gone. That brings us back to today. Twenty four months since I met you. Twenty four months and counting.
“When I used to read fairy-tales, I fancied that kind of thing never happened, and now here I am in the middle of one!”
― Lewis Carroll
Sincerely, Me.