I Myself Am Strange and Unusual

"I cannot believe we just did that," I husked out, flopping tiredly onto my back.

Audrey grinned, ruffling my hair. "Hey, doing surprising things is what I do."

"We just had sex in front of my unconscious ex-girlfriend."

"Technically speaking, you guys never broke up. So you just cheated in front of your unconscious girlfriend."

"Hey whore!" I yelled down to Sarah. "We're fuckin' ovah wiff!" Of course Sarah didn't move.

"So the word in town is that you're single now?" Audrey joked.

"Yeah, it's like a new fing I'm tryin'. Word travels fast, huh?"

"Well I have a question to ask you."

"What?"

Audrey sat up, pulling the sheets up to cover herself. "Will you be my boyfriend and stuff?"

"What?" I laughed out. "Yeh aren't supposed to ask me! I'm supposed to ask yeh! Will yeh be my girlfriend, Audrey?"

"Nope, I asked you first."

I rolled my eyes and sat up, kissing her quickly. "Fine, I will be yeh boyfriend yeh brat."

"Wooh! I win!"

"We both win!"

"Nuh uh!" She laughed, shaking her head. "I demasculinated you 'cause I asked you. I wear the pants in this relationship!"

I rolled my eyes, pushing her lightly. "Fuck off, yea?"

"Oh, is mister Malia getting all grumpy?" She cooed.

"Keep talkin' like that and we might have to have a round two, aye?"

Audrey laughed, "no way! We don't have time for that."

"Oh yea? What plans do we have today?"

"We're going to your band-mate's houses."

"Who says?"

"I do. Get dressed."

I raised my brow as she stepped out of the bed before falling flat on her face. "Ow!"

I laughed leaning over the bed. "What 'appened!"

"My legs are two sore and I fell! Fuck you!"

"How is this my fault!"

"You railed me too hard."

My face blushed immensely before she giggled and sat up. "I..."

"Shut up. Get dressed."

I chuckled and leaned over, slipping on a pair of boxers. By the time I was done getting completely dressed, Audrey was ready and writing a note. "Who's the note for?"

"Your ex," she grinned. "Let's go!" I watched as she ran out of the room. I looked down at the paper.



I laughed and ran after her out of the house.