Catastrophic Meltdown

Matty's sweaty arms draped around my shoulders. "What'd yeh fink of the show?"

I shrugged my shoulders, "meh, it was alright."

"Alright?" He laughed.

I nodded. "Yeah, not as cool as slaying Gannon in Zelda, but still pretty epic, you know?"

He rolled his eyes, laughing. "Yeh hurt my feelings."

"I didn't mean it! I was just kidding."

Matty smirked, "nope. Now I 'ave to get yeh back."

"Doing what?"

"I'm going to bring yeh on stage so a whole bunch of crazy teens waiting for the next band to come on can take pictures of yeh and throw them all over the internet."

"No!" I laughed, running and hiding behind Tom.

"Oh sure, forty minutes ago yeh were concerned about him raping you, but now he's going to save you?"

"Yup, right Tommy?"

Tom smirked, stepping out of the way. "Sorreh love. Matty was my friend first."

"Traitor!" I yelled, squealing as Matt's arms grabbed my body and threw me over his shoulder. "Matty! Put me down!"

"Nevah!" He laughed, walking on to the stage. The crowd erupted. "Ello chaps!" Matt spoke into one of the mics. "See this bird I 'ave on meh shouldah? Her name is Emma and she gets supah embarrassed very easily so I need yeh help. On the count of three, yeh gotta tell her 'ow fuckin' sexy she is. Readeh?"

"Matt! I yelled into his ear. "I'm going to murder you!"

"One..." he began, completely ignoring me. "Two..." he counted, placing my feet back on the ground. "Three!"

The entire crowd erupted into wolf whistles and chants. Immedietly my face turned the darkest shade of red I thought possible. I was frozen in place, completely unsure of what to do.

Matt simply laughed into the microphone. "Yeh guys were brill! Stay tuned fo' the Architects up next!" The crowd hollered again. A hand slipped into mine and pulled me off of stage in a daze.

"I fink she's frozen fo'evah!" Jona commented, coming out of the dressing room in clean clothes.

"Nah, just embarrassed."

"Jona!" I whined, running and hugging him. "Did you see that? It was awful. Completely awful."

He chuckled, wrapping his arms around me. "Oh no. I'll save yeh from the big bad Matty."

"Hey!" Matt yelled. "I'm not that bad!"

"Go get changed Mick Pickles. We're goin' out soon. I'll take the bird to the bus so she can change and I'll feed the cat, yea? We'll meet yeh at the bar."

Matt's eyes flashed down to where Jona's hands were on my waist before begrudgingly agreeing. "Yea sure. I'll see yeh there, mate. Adios Emma!"

"Yo no hablo esponiol!" I yelled back.

"Well that's obvious," Jona laughed. "'Cause that Spanish was dreadful."

"Shush," I pouted. He chuckled and lead me out the exit and towards the bus. "You know I could have just met all of you at the bar. You didn't have to come."

"Nah, I wanted too, love," he said, holding the door for the bus open for me. I stepped inside and headed towards the bunks.

"Why?"

"'Cause I wanted to get yeh dressed real slutteh."

I turned quickly and narrowed my eyes. "...why..."

"I have meh reasons, love. I've got no time to tell them to yeh now. Come on. Slut it up. I'll feed Frodo."

I groaned and shut the door to the bunks. What the fuck, Jona.