Too Much of Anything

Love doesn't exist. Not real love anyway. What I have experienced is much different to that and not so much of a happily ever after situation.

Even if you claim to be 'in love' it doesn't last long. Soon you'll lose what you had and then you'd be back to square one, alone.

I've been through this experience more than I can count. It's a constant thing. You may think I deserve this, being who I am and what I do to others.

But I do have feelings. Even a big headed, conceited casanova has a heart, you know. I guess some people just forget these little things.

Because we can all hurt, we can all cry. Even me. The first time I ever cried was when a kid in kindergarten stole my crayons, a trivial thing of course and maybe a little bit too far back to actually really matter.

But guess what, it mattered to me. The little Alex Gaskarth cried back then, the innocent version that didn't hurt people, that didn't know what it felt like to be on top of the world and then to have your crown snatched away from you.

I've always wished I could turn back time I change some of the things I did. But I'm not a magician, I'm just an ordinary boy. A boy who made too many mistakes in his life, ones he couldn't fix.

Take a look at what I've done. I've destroyed everything for myself. Because even when times were hard, I still had you, Jack.

You were there for me through and through. But then I let you go, didn't I? I created a monster wall between us, one that couldn't be brought down.

Do you hate me now, do you never want to see me again? I guess it's too late for second chances, I've had my fair share already.



Jack was smiling at me, a goofy grin on his face that was all too much for me. He didn't really know what the hell he was grinning at.

But hey, I guess it was funny. Somehow with us we always end up together at some party drunk.

I had a girl hanging onto my shoulder, whispering into my ear about all the dirty things she wished to do with me when we get out of here. I smirked at her, liking this idea very much.

While Jack, on the other hand, grimaced at me like I've done the worst thing possible. The girl, Casey I think her name was, went off to by a drink, leaving me and a very tipsy Jack by ourselves.

"You're not going to leave me here and go fuck another girl and leave her are you?" he pouted at me.

The idea of our little bet seemed to have disappeared from my mind for a while. But it was back again, making new decisions and new plans form in my head.

It seemed Jack knew me too well to think I'd do anything differently. But that's who I am. I never rarely have a girl longer than one day.

Not that I'm proud to say that. But it is entirely true.

"That's exactly right, Jack," I grinned at him, "How did you guess?"

He rolled his eyes, "Because that's what you always do. I've said this too many times but can't you just pick someone and go out with them longer than a day?"

I was beginning to get tired of this constant statement Jack was making. He'd never get off this subject.

"If you're that bothered we could leave that girl here and get it on ourselves," I couldn't help the tiny presence of a seductive look appear on my face.

He staggered backwards, seeming to be afraid of my words. God, he was so jumpy. I told him I wouldn't try anything, he didn't really believe me.

Jack formed his hands into a cross, almost like he was hoarding off a supernatural creature.

"It's not like I'm the devil or anything, Jacky," I snickered, "I was only joking."

He wasn't so sure about this, even so he dropped his hands to his sides.

"I could have guessed differently, just don't try anything!" he exclaimed.

I pouted, "But how am I supposed to win our bet if you won't even let me try?"

"That's the point, I won't let you win the bet. Don't think for one second you could turn me into another completely obsessive sex freak like those girls," he blabbed on.

Boy, Jack was being really defensive. I was going to prove him wrong though. Casey came back from getting a drink as I put an arm around her slim shoulders.

"Well then, Jack, if you don't mind me and Casey are going to go have some fun upstairs, right?" I looked at Casey expectantly, she just giggled.

Jack sighed stopping me from moving any further with Casey.

"That is unless you'd like to go home now, Jack," I wiggled my eyebrows suggestively.

He shook his head, "No, go fuck upstairs and leave me out of your sick little games."

Casey seemed to be confused at Jack's statement but I just shushed her and walked away from Jack. What sick little games? This was only a bet between two best friends. Nothing more, nothing less.