All That I've Got
A Suprising Secret
A Few Hours Later
"You said she was shivering before she blacked out Mr. Iero?" I heard the doctor say from inside the room, it sounded like he was writing something down on a clipboard.
"Yeah, I was hugging her when all of a sudden she starts shivering out of nowhere. Then she just went.. limp," Frank explained, still sitting next to me. Seriously, how was it that he was there every time I woke up?
"There's quite a few drugs that have that symptom, Mr. and Mrs. Winters. Did you notice any difference in your daughter's behavior that seemed strange?" the doctor asked.
"She seemed more distant than usual, of course we expected a difference in her, but it was almost like she couldn't keep focus and of course there's the fact that she's not talking," my mom explained.
"I think that last part might be more than rebellion. Certain medications can cause sore throat, but in extreme cases they can also begin to close up the vocal cords. It's very rare, but we do have reports of it," Dr. Scott explained, his pen scratching even faster across the paper.
"So you mean if something isn't done soon, Carys will never be able to talk?" my dad asked, it sounded like my mom was tearing up at this.
"Precisely Mr. Winters, but fortunately, we have a few options. One, because her vocal cords aren't sealed tight yet, this is going to sound funny, but someone could work with her on her speech. If she's encouraged to talk it'll slow down the process of the drug. We just have to figure out what it is so we can do what we have to to get it out of her. Two, surgery is also an option, but it's very time consuming and has to be done correctly. I assure you that we have some of the best surgeons in the state, but even then, surgery is never free of worry."
"He means that something could go wrong if you did choose surgery, Mom and Dad," I heard Jake speak up after that uncomfortable silence formed.
"Dr. Scott, how high is the success rate with the first option," my mother said, clearing her throat.
"Depending on the surgeon, it's about an 86% success rate on average. My youngest daughter was born with a condition in which her vocal cords were almost completely closed, and the surgery helped tremendously. I'm being truthful when I say it requires absolute patience a situation like this. Perhaps you could try therapy for a few weeks and if it doesn't work out, we can discuss the surgery option. Excuse me," he said, the sound of his footsteps leaving the room.
"I'm going to take your mother home for a few hours, can you boys keep an eye on Carys please?" my father asked, leaving the room with my still-crying mother a minute later, my queue to wake up.
"Afternoon m'lady," Frank said smirking down at me, Jake faking the same smile and laughing at the annoyed look I gave both of them. "But seriously, I knew you weren't asleep Car," he said, poking me playfully.
"You should have a say in this Carys. I know there's a crap load going on, but what do you think?" Jake asked me.
I reached for my notebook and began writing, hoping I was wording this in the way I was thinking.
Surgery really would be the very last thing on my list, but I am so sick of therapists, it's not even funny!
"We'll be your speech therapists then," Jake said smiling. "Of course I might have to leave in a week or two, but I don't think Frank's going anywhere, what about it Iero?"
"Sign me up," he said nodding. "The guys are all on vacation so I'm free for the remainder of the summer."
"We should probably wait until you're out of the hospital, less stress to deal with, but what about it sis?" Jake asked again.
Okay, we can give it a shot, but what's with Mom? I've never seen her cry like this, even when they put me in the institution.
Frank and Jake looked up at each other, almost like they were debating to tell me something, which was worrying me.
"Carys, you absolutely cannot get mad when I tell you this," Jake said with one of the most serious expressions I'd ever seen him use. This was definately big.
I hesitated a moment before nodding slowly, despite the millions of protests going off in my head, telling me I didn't want to know and that it would only cause more problems.
"Mom's....ha...having another baby," Jake said looking down to the floor.
I couldn't help myself, I pulled my knees up to my chest and hid my face, the tears were clearly stronger than my attempts to hide the pain inside me. My parents were having another baby, another kid to replace the disappointment of a daughter that'd let them down.
"Sshhh Car," Frank said softly as he wrapped his arms around me, Jake joining in on the hug. It didn't help, my parents had kept this from me and probably had no intention of telling me anytime soon, what had I done to cause everyone so much pain? What was the point of my existance?
"You said she was shivering before she blacked out Mr. Iero?" I heard the doctor say from inside the room, it sounded like he was writing something down on a clipboard.
"Yeah, I was hugging her when all of a sudden she starts shivering out of nowhere. Then she just went.. limp," Frank explained, still sitting next to me. Seriously, how was it that he was there every time I woke up?
"There's quite a few drugs that have that symptom, Mr. and Mrs. Winters. Did you notice any difference in your daughter's behavior that seemed strange?" the doctor asked.
"She seemed more distant than usual, of course we expected a difference in her, but it was almost like she couldn't keep focus and of course there's the fact that she's not talking," my mom explained.
"I think that last part might be more than rebellion. Certain medications can cause sore throat, but in extreme cases they can also begin to close up the vocal cords. It's very rare, but we do have reports of it," Dr. Scott explained, his pen scratching even faster across the paper.
"So you mean if something isn't done soon, Carys will never be able to talk?" my dad asked, it sounded like my mom was tearing up at this.
"Precisely Mr. Winters, but fortunately, we have a few options. One, because her vocal cords aren't sealed tight yet, this is going to sound funny, but someone could work with her on her speech. If she's encouraged to talk it'll slow down the process of the drug. We just have to figure out what it is so we can do what we have to to get it out of her. Two, surgery is also an option, but it's very time consuming and has to be done correctly. I assure you that we have some of the best surgeons in the state, but even then, surgery is never free of worry."
"He means that something could go wrong if you did choose surgery, Mom and Dad," I heard Jake speak up after that uncomfortable silence formed.
"Dr. Scott, how high is the success rate with the first option," my mother said, clearing her throat.
"Depending on the surgeon, it's about an 86% success rate on average. My youngest daughter was born with a condition in which her vocal cords were almost completely closed, and the surgery helped tremendously. I'm being truthful when I say it requires absolute patience a situation like this. Perhaps you could try therapy for a few weeks and if it doesn't work out, we can discuss the surgery option. Excuse me," he said, the sound of his footsteps leaving the room.
"I'm going to take your mother home for a few hours, can you boys keep an eye on Carys please?" my father asked, leaving the room with my still-crying mother a minute later, my queue to wake up.
"Afternoon m'lady," Frank said smirking down at me, Jake faking the same smile and laughing at the annoyed look I gave both of them. "But seriously, I knew you weren't asleep Car," he said, poking me playfully.
"You should have a say in this Carys. I know there's a crap load going on, but what do you think?" Jake asked me.
I reached for my notebook and began writing, hoping I was wording this in the way I was thinking.
Surgery really would be the very last thing on my list, but I am so sick of therapists, it's not even funny!
"We'll be your speech therapists then," Jake said smiling. "Of course I might have to leave in a week or two, but I don't think Frank's going anywhere, what about it Iero?"
"Sign me up," he said nodding. "The guys are all on vacation so I'm free for the remainder of the summer."
"We should probably wait until you're out of the hospital, less stress to deal with, but what about it sis?" Jake asked again.
Okay, we can give it a shot, but what's with Mom? I've never seen her cry like this, even when they put me in the institution.
Frank and Jake looked up at each other, almost like they were debating to tell me something, which was worrying me.
"Carys, you absolutely cannot get mad when I tell you this," Jake said with one of the most serious expressions I'd ever seen him use. This was definately big.
I hesitated a moment before nodding slowly, despite the millions of protests going off in my head, telling me I didn't want to know and that it would only cause more problems.
"Mom's....ha...having another baby," Jake said looking down to the floor.
I couldn't help myself, I pulled my knees up to my chest and hid my face, the tears were clearly stronger than my attempts to hide the pain inside me. My parents were having another baby, another kid to replace the disappointment of a daughter that'd let them down.
"Sshhh Car," Frank said softly as he wrapped his arms around me, Jake joining in on the hug. It didn't help, my parents had kept this from me and probably had no intention of telling me anytime soon, what had I done to cause everyone so much pain? What was the point of my existance?