Crystal Ball

Janie splashed around in the pool while I watched from a nearby chair. Dottie had invited the two of us over for a backyard barbeque. Pop stood over the grill on the edge of the back lawn his eyes wandering to us every so often.

“Momma?” Janie called from the water.

“Yes baby?”

“Can I go play with Uncle Justin?”

“Where is Jus?” I asked, noticing his and Lottie’s absence.

Dottie patted my shoulder. “I think they went up to the tree house. Gosh, I remember when you and Alex used to spend all your time up there. I guess it’s good that it isn’t just rotting away.”

I smiled wistfully, begging my mind not to run through the slew of memories that wooden box held. Before any specific memory could find a root, a door slammed behind us. “Justin and Charlotte are in the tree house?” Alex’s voice asked loudly.

“I think so…” his mother began before Alex had crossed the patio in three long strides, jumping from the steps as he ran towards the tree in the far corner of the yard.

“What’s that about?” I questioned, looking from Dottie to Jack who stood by the door him and Alex had emerged from moments before.

Jack shrugged as Dottie shook her head. “He doesn’t like when they use the tree house,” she answered, her expression confused. “I’ve never understood it. The tree house was always a fun place for you two growing up, why can’t his sister have that too?”

“Momma,” Janie’s voice pulled my mind away from the reason that popped into my mind first. “Can I?”

“Can you what, baby?” I asked, distracted.

“Play with Uncle Justin.”

I looked to the tree house in the distance where Alex pounded on the locked door, his voice carrying ever so slightly, telling the two teenagers to open it. “Maybe later,” I answered Janie. “Right now, why don’t we get dried off; I think lunch is almost ready.”

She pouted but did as I asked. Dottie helped towel dry her as I excused myself. I wandered to the tree house; my eyes locked on Alex’s obviously tense body. He didn’t notice my approach as I climbed the rickety ladder. “Lottie! Get your ass out here.” His voice was loud and strained as if he were actually holding back, though that didn’t appear to be the case.

“What’s wrong with them using the tree house?” I asked. He spun around, startled. As he was seemingly at a loss for words, I continued. “It’s just a tree house.”

His eyes blazed. Turning back to the door, he raised his fist to pound on the door once more, but didn’t get the chance. “Jeepers Creepers. We’re out. Happy?” Lottie asked sarcastically, Justin ducking his head as he followed her out the door and down the ladder.

I shook my head at Alex, as we stood on the wrap around porch, disappointed somehow. I couldn’t explain exactly why. I just was. Deducting that he had nothing to say to me, I followed Lottie and my brother down the ladder and back to the barbeque. When I looked back at the tree house, it was just in time to see Alex disappear inside.

Shaking him from my mind, I turned to Dottie, who was asking me about my new job. “Oh, its great,” I answered, plastering a smile on my lips. “Doug is starting to warm up to me, and to Janie. I think it’s perfect for us.”

“Well that’s great, dear. I’m so glad you’re fitting right back into you’re old life. I just wish Alex seemed more happy that you are home.” Dottie frowned, looking out across the lawn. I sipped my cola as Jack squeezed my shoulder reassuringly. I smiled half-heartedly to him in thanks.



When the sun had set and the mosquitoes began to make a presence, everyone made their way indoors. Alex had rejoined us a while earlier, though he hadn’t so much as looked in my direction.

“Rian and Sarah are having a get-together at their apartment, did you want to join? I know he’s excited to see you,” Jack offered.

I could feel Alex’s eyes on me as he sipped from the beer bottle in his hand, awaiting my answer. “I don’t know. I mean, I am excited to see Rian. But my dad isn’t home; I have no one to watch Janie.”

“Take her with us.”

I shook my head. “It’s too late, she should have been in bed half an hour ago. Besides, I don’t really think a late night party is the best place for her.”

“Hey, Mrs. G,” Jack called into the kitchen. When she craned her neck around the corner, he asked, “Can you watch Janie while we take Emma to Rian’s?”

“Of course. I’d love to.” She smiled sweetly at me before returning to the kitchen.

With no other reason not to go, I kissed Janie’s forehead and told her to listen to Dottie and head to bed. She hugged Jack before we left the house and sent Alex a friendly wave that he returned hesitantly.

In the car, it was silent. The radio wasn’t even on, and no one dared to change it. The tension from mine and Alex’s close proximity was palpable, and I couldn’t think of a word to say to dissipate it. Thankfully, the car ride was short. Alex bounded out of the car the second Jack and put it in park. We followed slowly.

Jack threw an arm over my shoulder as we walked up the drive. He leaned close to my ear. “I’m sorry for him. I don’t think he knows what to say to you.”

“Jack, don’t apologize for him. I get it. He’s not happy with me. I wouldn’t be either, especially after what I said before I left.”

“What’d you say before you left?” he questioned.

I didn’t answer as we entered the apartment, immediately bombarded by Rian and one of his bear hugs; I was torn from Jack’s side. “My God, I missed you, Ems.”

I laughed, gently pulling away from him. “I missed you too, Ri Bear.”

“You remember Sarah?” Rian motioned to a petite blonde to his right. I nodded, faintly remembering the girl Rian had been infatuated with for the latter half junior year.

We exchanged pleasantries and she took over the roll of trying to make sure I was comfortable. Sarah seemed to have one of those bubbly personalities and a mouth that never closed. She talked a mile a minute and I had to strain to keep up with all of her introductions, anecdotes of the past four years, and too much gossip for me to remember.

Eventually I found myself on the balcony, sipping at a Solo cup filled to the brim with a golden liquid. Tucked into a lawn chair in the corner, I watched as the sliding glass door opened and voices filtered out.

“What the hell, Ri. There’s nothing out here,” Alex complained as the older boy pushed him out the door. When he turned around to go back inside, the door was closed. He pulled the door, but it wouldn’t budge. “What the fuck. Rian, open the Goddamn door!” He pounded on the glass to get someone’s attention, but no one paid any.

Finally, he sat with the glass to his back and took a long drink from the bottle that dangled in his grip. Looking around, he finally noticed me in the chair, watching him unsurely. “Fucking great!” he muttered, his head hitting the door with a distinct pop.

I gulped from the cup in my hand and looked out at the few stars that were visible through the slow moving clouds from Rian’s apartment in the city. The air had cooled, though it still had to be about seventy degrees, after the sunset. I tried to act as if Alex weren’t simply three or four feet from me on the small balcony, but it was as if I could feel our proximity. I could feel his eyes as they watched me in the dark.

Finally, I spoke without looking in his direction, “What’s with the staring?” He looked away, gulping the last of his beer before tossing the bottle over the railing carelessly. He didn’t answer. “Still going with the silent treatment, I see.” I smiled despite myself. “You can’t ignore me forever you know.”

“I’m not ignoring you,” he said softly, his eyes not meeting mine.

“Right.”

“I just don’t know what you want me to say.” Slowly, he looked up. “What do you want from me, Emma? What am I supposed to say now that you’re here? Especially after what you said.”

I sighed under his gaze, my eyes downcast. “I didn’t mean what I said.”

“And why the fuck is Jack your new best friend? What’s that about?” he continued, ignoring my comment. Before I could answer, he pressed on. “And don’t even get me started on that kid. How the hell did you keep that big of a secret? You had Justin and your dad lying for you. Even if we weren’t friends anymore, our families have been for years, yet you kept it from them too. Do you know how heartbroken my mom was? The least you could have done was tell her.”

He ended his rant, his voice fading into the darkness, the most he had said to me in over four years.

“First off,” I began, my tone icy. “That kid is my daughter, and she has a name. Second, don’t you think I hated lying to everyone? But guess what, it was my choice. I won’t let you play the guilt card. And what the hell does it matter that Jack and I are friends still? We were friends all through high school. Besides, he was the first one to accept me back, aside from your mom. So, sorry I’m closer to him because of it. Just because you’re jealous doesn’t give you the right to rag on me.”

“I am not jealous. I’m upset and rightfully so. You ended a lifetime of friendship and then left without a word. How the fuck was I supposed to deal with that?”

I shrugged, finishing off my drink. “I don’t know. But you could be a little more civil.” I stood from the chair in the corner and walked over to where he was sitting. He looked up at me as I knocked on the door at his back.

Jack stood on the other side, his brows furrowed as he opened the door. Alex had to lean forward so he wouldn’t fall backwards into the apartment. Before I disappeared inside, I looked at him once more. “And did you know that you are the only person who hasn’t asked me a damn question about Janie? Everyone else was interested. Why not you?”

And with that, I shut the door and asked Jack to drive me home. I couldn’t take one more second in the same building as Alex. I couldn’t breath in any more tension or animosity tonight.