His Fingertips Have Memories

Marissa stepped back from Bob. He was too much in shock to even attempt to read the expression on her face. In fact, Bob wouldn’t be surprised if her house went on fire and he didn’t even realize it. There were a million different questions swimming in and out of his brain, but there was only one he could manage to say.

“Wh—What the fuck was that?!” he spat.

Marissa put her hands on her hips. Her pregnant, married hands on her pregnant, married hips. Bob thought he was going to puke, cry, or faint. A combination of the three wouldn’t have surprised him.

“That was a kiss Bobbie,” said Marissa as if it hadn’t fazed her at all.

“Yeah, well. Yeah, I know that because I’m a big boy but I—you’re married and a mommy and shit. And, oh my god is it hot in here?” he asked tugging at his shirt collar. Marissa laughed at him. “Oh yes, hysterical Yeah. So uhm, the weather…”

Marissa took a step forward. “Don’t freak out Bob, gosh,” she said as she attempted to put her hand on his arm, but he jumped back.

“Don’t! Oi Gevald!” he said much louder than intended.

Marissa laughed and it took her a moment to regain her composure. “What are you Jewish all of a sudden?”

“H—How can you be so calm about this?! You’re married! I’m Bob and you just don’t kiss Bob! Like no, I mean you can but you can’t!”

Marissa rolled her eyes. “Oh my god, it was one little kiss. It didn’t mean anything to me! See you’re getting so worked up about it because you don’t really have feelings for Amy! You just think you do! You’re doubting your feelings for her!”

“NO! I just kissed a married girl. Holy shit Conner is going to kill me…I have to skip town, change my name!”

“ROBERT! Shut the fuck up! Okay? Calm down. Let me explain.”

“No, I don’t want to hear your twisted and warped girl logic because, earth to girl, here in the real fucking world it doesn’t make any sense! Okay, so just leave me alone and never talk to me again! Because I will not let you ruin what I have with Amy. I’m sorry you’re a psycho jealous bitch but that is not my problem. For the past two years I’ve let you bad mouth her, but I love her. I always have and always will and no matter how many times you kiss me I will never doubt that or whatever the fuck you were going on about!” shouted Bob and with that he turned got into his car and drove off.

He didn’t know where to go. He could go home, but he figured he’d go insane being home alone. Bob couldn’t go to Amy’s because they just got back together, and he was kissing Marissa. He could go to Gerard’s or one of the guys, but he didn’t feel like it. He needed to get away. So, he ended up just driving around for about an hour thinking about everything. What Marissa was saying didn’t even make sense! He was getting worked up because she married for Christ sake. She had a kid, and another one on the way! He felt like shit so he ended up getting ice cream and eating it all alone in the parlor. Why does this jacked up shit always have to happen to me? he asked himself as he ate his cookie dough ice cream. Why do I feel like things would have gone a lot further if Marissa hadn’t pulled away?