Faithfully Yours

“Hey, who is this going to be?” I said to little Jessica after hearing the doorbell go. I could see who it was through the glass of the front door. Billie.

I opened the door and watched my daughter’s face.

“Unca Biwwie,” she said in her sweet little voice then started giggling as Billie made a few faces at her then bent down and picked her up. Her hair so very blond next to his jet-black spikes.

“Hey little one,” he said. “What have you been doing?”

“Bakin for Daddy,” she said and began picking at one of Billie’s buttons on his shirt.

“Not those chocolate muffins that you and your mom make? Am I in time for one?” He said looking at her.

“Can Unca Biwwie have a muffin mommy?” She said looking at me.

”Of course he can, we’ve got loads and there’s a pot of coffee on, come on through,” I said to him.

He put Jessica down but she immediately took him through to the kitchen where she took him over to the tray of muffins and asked him to choose one but not the largest one because that was for her Daddy. Of course.

After he’d chosen Jessica happily went off to fetch the doll that Tre had bought her yesterday. He was always spoiling her, treating her to little things nearly every day and it was the only argument we seemed to have about the way he spoilt Jessica and hardly bought anything for Ryan. He was good with Ryan and bought him things occasionally but not like he was with Jessie, his beloved little princess. It was as though he was making up time, time that he missed out on with Ramona all those years ago when Lisea had taken her away from him.

“So, the big fella not in?” said Billie, mouth full of muffin.

“No, I haven’t seen him today, he went out early, probably saw what a glorious sunny day it was and got up and went off to play golf. He left a note saying that he would be at the club. He’s probably with Mike.” I said passing a mug of coffee over to Billie.

“No he’s not with Mike, Mike was with Estelle in Starbucks as I passed by,” said Billie.

“Oh, I don’t know who he’s with then,” I said frowning. May be he’s just gone to have a practice.

“That must be it,” said Billie.

He sounded down I noticed as I loaded the dishwasher with all the dirty pots and pans from our baking.

”Are you OK Billie?” I said glancing up at him.

“Not really,” he said. “I’m kind of having writer’s block. American Idiot really took it out of us, I don’t know how to follow it.”

“That’s only to be expected, it was huge, and you had a long tour, eighteen months. You need a break, why don’t you and Adrienne go away together, get a rest, I’ll have the boys.” I said to him closing up the dishwasher and grabbing my coffee.

But he turned away and just went over to the kitchen window and looked out at the garden.

“That won’t be happening,” said Billie.

”Why not?” I said frowning. Something was bothering Billie.

“Adrienne and I…she’s gone to her parents for a while,” he said.

”What? But you were OK yesterday,” I said putting my coffee down and going to him.

“No we weren’t, it was all an act, and it’s been an act for a couple of months now,” he said.

I put my arm across his shoulders.

“I’m so sorry Billie, I had no idea,” I said to him.

He turned to look at me and his eyes were slightly bloodshot, like he hadn’t slept for a while. I’d not noticed this, I’d been busy with my children and Tre was in a strange mood yesterday, perhaps he’d sensed something.

“I’m not sure what’s going to happen,” said Billie. “She said she needed some space. Space? Why would she need space from me? I really don’t understand.”

“Oh Billie come here,” I said to him and brought him in for a hug. He loved Adrienne so much; this was just something small, I was sure of it. They were great together, a great family.

“I think she still has this hang up over Jessie.” He said.

”You’re kidding. Billie I thought Adrienne was very understanding over Jessie, you told her years ago, years ago when you first met. You must be wrong, that can’t be it.” I said convinced that he was being stupid here and that his first love, my friend Jessica who had been killed before they’d even had a chance to get married was the cause of Adrienne going off.

“She brings her up sometimes, sometimes if we’d had an argument she sometimes says things like, ‘I wonder if you and Jessie would have had a little girl’ or ‘Do you think you would have lived in England if you’d got together with Jessie’ or ‘Would you and Jessie still be together now if she hadn’t have died.’

“Really?” This didn’t sound like Adrienne at all.

“Yes,”, not often, don’t get me wrong, but just now and again when we’ve may be got on each other’s nerves.

He drained his coffee.

“Would you like something stronger? A beer?” I said to him.

“Yeah, why not,” said Billie. “Listen Stella, don’t say anything to Tre, it may be nothing but, I thought I’d let you know, you were Jessie’s best friend and Adrienne thinks the world of you I just wondered if she’d said anything about us,” he said as I handed him the beer.

”She hasn’t said anything to me,” I said wiping down the surfaces, “and of course I won’t say anything to Tre, I won’t even tell him you came.”

Billie finished his beer and I told him not to worry about anything, it was something over nothing and he should get to the bottom of it with Adrienne.

**

An hour later Tre walked in, he didn’t seem to be in a very good mood, he couldn’t have had a good time at the golf club, but I’d made his favourite meal so hopefully that would cheer him up.

“Daddy I’ve got a muffin for you,” said his little princess going straight over to him to be picked up. “I’ve got the biggest one for you,” she said handing it to him in her little pudgy hands.

“The biggest for me, you’re an angel,” said Tre taking a munch out of his muffin.

“So who were you at the golf club with today?” I asked him and heading off to the kitchen. “Was it Mike?” I shouted.

“No, I couldn’t get hold of Mike today, I just had a game to myself but I was crap,” he said heading over to the dustbin to put the muffin case in.

“Oh right,” said Stella knowing that she couldn’t tell him that Billie had seen Mike in Starbucks because then he would realise that Billie would have been here and seeing as Billie didn’t want him to know anything she decided it was best that he thought he hadn’t been here at all.

As Tre opened the bin he noticed an empty bottle of beer.

Someone had been here.

Had Mike been here?